


Courage

by Abi623



Category: Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Genre: F/M, Friendship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-10
Updated: 2016-11-23
Packaged: 2018-06-07 14:34:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 48,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6809164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Abi623/pseuds/Abi623
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Today is the day, Peeta thought. Of course, he’d been saying that for the past ten years and it hadn’t happened yet. Peeta strikes up the nerve to talk to Katniss before the 74th Annual Hunger Games. AU. Rated T for mild language and adult situations.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Decent Start

**Author's Note:**

> This fic has already been posted on my FF.net account under the same name, Abi623. As of 5/10/2016, I have ten chapters posted. Hopefully I’ll be able to post all the chapters I have as quickly as possible. Thanks for understanding!
> 
> This story follows both Katniss and Peeta in the months before the Hunger Games and I plan to continue it through all the books. It is AU.

_ Today is the day, _ Peeta thought as he looked into the faded gleam of the mirror in the bathroom. Today, he was going to talk to her. Of course, he’d been saying that for the past ten years and it hadn’t happened yet. He smoothed his blonde waves down over his forehead, hoping to shape it into some sort of order. It didn’t work. As soon as his hand left his hair, they popped up in their unruly fashion. He sighed to himself and moved to exit the bathroom. In the common area of his family’s apartment, his mother caught sight of him preparing to leave for school.

“‘Bout time you got out of that bathroom.” His mother commented disdainfully. “Get your lazy butt to school, Peeta!”

“Sorry, Mom.” He replied automatically. Fifteen years had taught him to apologize for any and everything concerning his mother. He gathered his textbooks and turned to head downstairs into the family bakery.

“Peeta!” His father greeted from the kitchen.  The small smile his father had to offer was somewhat comforting after the snide comment from his mother. “You better hurry or you’ll be late. Robbie already left.”

“I’m leaving now.“ Peeta assured him, heading for the back door and grabbing his jacket.

“Did you eat?” His father asked as he followed. Peeta shook his head, frowning. Sometimes, if he looked pathetic enough, his father would let him have one of the “faulty” pastries for breakfast. It worked, apparently, because his father sighed and shook his head as he disappeared into the storefront. He came back moments later with a danish that had some smudged icing. “Don’t tell you mother.” He muttered as he handed it to his son.

Peeta didn’t have to be told twice. The last time his mother caught him sneaking food from the bakery, she rapped him so hard across the knuckles, they bled. He waved gratefully to his father and rushed out the back door. His oldest brother, Clyde, was out in the backyard, tossing feed to the various animals kept there. The brothers ignored each other, like most mornings, and Peeta raced towards the school.

He wasn’t late, thank goodness, but by the second period, he had developed a twitch in his right leg. The instant he’d stepped onto the schoolyard that morning, he’d spotted her. Katniss. Looking as pretty as ever. His earlier determination floated to the forefront of his mind. He could barely pay attention in class. Instead, he kept stealing glances at her from the corner of his eye. She never seemed to notice, she just kept glaring at the book on her desk. By lunch, he’d worked up a sweat trying to come up with a reason to talk to her and what he would say.

He’d only had a crush on her for what? Ten years? He never really had a problem with words, they just seem to come out. People usually listened to what he had to say. At least his friends did. Peeta stared down at his lunch, uninterested at its content. His friends were talking casually around him and he tuned out their conversation in favor of searching the cafeteria for the her. She sat in the corner of the room, with the Mayor’s daughter as always. Neither were talking which was also normal. He studied Katniss carefully. She was frowning into her lunch. He couldn’t see clearly, but it looked to be a piece of dark bread and a thermos of what he assumed was soup.

He suddenly felt guilty. He’d only ever had tesserae bread once or twice. It wasn’t anything like the bread his family made, tasteless, chewy, and dry. Peeta gazed down at his own lunch. A sandwich, made with delicate white bread his father had made a couple days ago, thick slices of ham and a slice of tomato. He also had an apple and shortbread cookies. Maybe he should give her some of his lunch? Before he could think more on the idea, he felt an elbow in his ribs.

“Hey,” his friend, Mark, said. “You alright, Peeta? You look like you’re gonna hurl or something.”

Peeta tore his eyes away from the Seam girl and to the boy sitting beside him. “I’m fine,” He replied and forced a smile.

“Is it your food?” He asked. “‘Cause if it is, I’ll eat it.” Mark laughed.

Peeta lifted the sandwich to his mouth and licked one side of it before handing out to his friend in mock offering. Mark blanched and muttered something under his breath before laughing again. Peeta found himself laughing along. He finished his lunch in silence, berating himself for hoarding it and not sharing it with Katniss.

The day was only half over, and he already felt drained. All this thinking and worrying over his crush really took it’s toll. He vowed to push her from his thoughts and focus on his classes. Not a minute after making the vow, however, he broke it. He was walking to his first class after lunch when he rounded a corner and collided with a body. The sound of books hitting the floor drew his eye to the floor where a blonde girl his age layed sprawled out on the tiles. Madge, the Mayor’s daughter. He swore under his breath and bent to help her up.

“I’m so sorry, Madge.” He apologized as he helped her to her feet. He thought he heard her mutter something, but he was distracted by the thought of their books on the floor.

He stooped down and began piling them in his arms, not really paying attention. So it shocked him when his hand bumped into another. His eyes flashed up to the owner and he felt like the breath had been knocked out of him. There she was, looking at him with those beautiful gray eyes. He’s never been this close to her and certainly never touched her or talked to her before. His brain screamed,  _ Here’s your chance! _ But he could barely hear it over his frantically beating heart.

“S-sorry.” He mumbled under his breath, dumbstruck. Katniss drew her eyebrows together and frowned at him in confusion. She said nothing as she picked up the remaining book and stood swiftly. He followed her to his feet, eager to have a chance to talk to her. When he straightened to his full height, she had already handed the book to Madge and was turning to leave.

“Wait!” He exclaimed suddenly without thinking. She turned back to him, a confused look on her prettily tan face. “Uh… Um-have a nice day?” He stammered. Then he glanced at Madge and felt like a complete idiot. So he added, “Both of you! Happy Friday?”

Madge offered a kind smile as she tugged her books from his hands. “Thanks, Peeta.” She said sincerely before turning towards Katniss. Peeta stared at Katniss with wide eyes, debating on whether or not to say anything more. He’d already made a complete fool of himself.

“Thanks,” she finally murmured. It was low, and soft, but he heard it. And it made his heart race.  _ She spoke to me! _ He thought in wonder. He didn’t get another chance to say anything, though. They had both turned and started down the hallway to their next class.

Peeta had trouble containing his smile for the rest of the day.

 

* * *

 

 

Saturday was a busy day at the bakery. Peeta and his brothers woke before the sun was up in order to start on the day’s work. His mind was still reeling after his run-in with Katniss the day before. He found himself daydreaming about possible future “accidents” where he could run into her. One in particular featured him heroically pulling her to safety during a tornado drill that wasn’t really a drill. In his fantasy, he pushed her from under falling debris and she had kissed him as a reward. He could almost feel her soft lips brushing against his.

“ _ Peeta! _ ” The voice snapped him back to reality. By the tone of Clyde’s voice, that wasn’t the first time he’d said his name. “What’s up with you? What did you do to that dough?”

Peeta glanced down at the dough he was working in his hands and groaned. Thankfully, his mother slept in on Saturdays and he could avoid her wrath for botching up a batch of cinnamon nut rolls. The dough was clearly over-worked and was no long light and fluffy, but tough and sticky. The cinnamon that was supposed to be swirled gently through was now thoroughly mixed in. He might be able to salvage it, but it wouldn’t be near good enough to sell. He’d have to save it for their personal bread basket.

“Well?” Clyde asked again, looking over his shoulder and eyeing the dough crytically.

“I got distracted.” He explained as he set the dough aside to fix later. “Please don’t tell, Mom.” He begged softly.

His brother clapped him on the back in an unusual show of affection and promised not to say a word. Probably because he was getting married soon and moving out. Clyde had always been the favorite, and as oldest, he was most likely to tattle on his brothers. MAybe now that he was leaving, he could see that his younger brothers weren’t quite so bad. The three brothers got back to work, the sound of the bell over the dough signifying their father was opening the shop for the day. Robbie had taken over the breadmaking when the first of the cookies and cupcakes were finished baking. Peeta set them to cool and began to whip up the icing.

“So, what has you so distracted today?” Robbie asked from the other side of the worktable. He didn’t look up from the bowl he was mixing, but the smirk on his face was clearly visible.

“Nothing.” Peeta muttered under his breath, feeling his cheeks flush. He tried to focus on coloring the icing just right and not the snort of disbelief his brother made.

“Uh-huh, sure,” he said. “Are you sure it had nothing to do with that Seam girl, Katniss?”

Peeta’s whole body went rigid when Robbie spoke her name. When he was younger, he had confided in his older brother about his crush. His brother had brushed it off as unimportant and hadn’t mentioned it in a long time. He was actually hoping Robbie had forgotten all about it. 

“What’s this, now?” Clyde piqued up from his place by the ovens. “Peeta’s finally got a girlfriend?”

Peeta clenched his jaw and fisted his hands at his sides. “She’s not my girlfriend!” He claimed indignantly, flushing.

Robbie snickered and began to knead the dough on the counter. “I saw him the hall yesterday-” He said between fits of laughter. “Stammering like an idiot at her. Poor girl didn’t know what to say!”

“Shut up, Robbie!” Peeta yelled as he turned back to the icing in front of him. Clyde had joined in on the laughter as well by that point. Peeta could see him out the corner of his eye, shoulders shaking with laughter as he took some bread loaves from the oven.

“What’s going on back here?” Their father poked his head into the kitchen from the storefront, a reprimanding look already on his face.

“Nothing.” Peeta asserted, avoiding his gaze.

Clyde and Robbie continued laughing, taking pleasure in their brother’s discomfort. Mr. Mellark didn’t believe that for a minute. Peeta’s face was bright red and he was precariously close to breaking the pastry bag with his jerking, forceful movements.

“Robbie, get those loaves in the oven and help me out front.” He commanded, hoping that breaking up the duo would lessen Peeta’s distress. “And Peeta, careful with those bags.”

Peeta continued on with his work through the day, only stopping to eat a quick cold lunch out on the frigid porch in order to avoid the rest his family. By late afternoon, he finally got permission to call it a day, but only on the condition that he make the deliveries. He welcomed the chance to get out of the house. The cold January air ruffled his hair and turned his face pink. By the time he got home, his father was closing the bakery and his mother was finishing making dinner. They sat at the table silently, like every night. The silence only broken by the sound of silverware hitting plates. That is, until Mrs. Mellark took a bite of her roll. Her face scrunched up in obvious disgust and she spit the mouthful onto her plate.

“Who made these disgusting rolls?!” She shrieked.

The whole table had gone still, Peeta especially. He panicked as he remembered making the dough for rolls in the morning. Over-kneading them, setting them aside, then finally switched them out with the dough his mother had assigned for dinner that night. He hoped by some miracle she wouldn’t notice. That was a long shot.

“Well?” She asked, voice still raised.

Nobody had said anything and Peeta knew the longer he waited, the worse his punishment would be. So he cleared his throat, and raised his hand slightly. “I- I did, Mom.” He confessed nervously.

She turned her cold eyes on him and considered him for a moment before frowning. “And why, might I ask, are they so hard and unappealing? And what happened to the rolls I told you to make for tonight?”

“I, uh… Over-kneaded one of the batches this morning, so I switched it out?” Peeta ended his account in a question, hoping it made him seem vulnerable and blame-free. It didn’t work.

“You think cinnamon grows on trees?” She asked incredulous. “I guess you just put the second-rate ingredients into the rolls you replaced them with, didn’t you? How do you think it makes us look when we sell our customers sub-par goods?”

“I didn’t mean to!” Peeta defended. “It was an accident!”

“You always were incompetent.” She spat. “You’re lucky you can make those fancy cakes, otherwise I’d had turned you into the orphanage long ago!”

“Sudie!” Mr. Mellark admonished. “Leave the boy alone, he’s suffered enough.”

“Yeah, Mom,” Clyde interrupted, unafraid of incurring wrath from his mother. He was the favorite son, afterall. “It’s not his fault he spent all morning mooning over the that Everdeen girl.”

Sudie Mellark started upright. “Everdeen girl?” She glared at Peeta and then to her husband.

“I’m sorry, Mom!” Peeta apologized. “It won’t happen again!”

Mrs. Mellark narrowed her eyes at her son, grabbed the ladle and brought it down on Peeta’s knuckles lightning quick. Peeta let out a howl of pain and cradled his injured hand to his chest. “Damn right it won’t happen again, you worthless piece of trash! Go to bed!”

Peeta did as he was told storming off to the bedroom he shared with Robbie, hearing the raised voices of his parents arguing yet again. He slammed the bedroom door with more force than was necessary. It wasn’t until he was sitting on his bed that he looked down at his right hand. A red welt was forming across his knuckles, and there was blood seeping from a small cut. It stung. Not wanting to go across the hall to the bathroom, Peeta wiped the blood on the side of his pants and laid down in his bed.

Morning came too quick. But luckily it was Sunday and he was spared from waking too early. He finally made his way down to the bakery in the late morning, peering around corners and watching for sight of his mother. Satisfied she wasn’t there, he strolled into the kitchen. Clyde was mixing something in a bowl and his father sat beside him frosting some cookies.  He stepped up beside his father and grabbed a cookie to frost.

“Morning, Peeta. “ His father greeted. “How’s the hand?”

He displayed the red, swollen skin of his knuckles in response, wincing when Mr. Mellark prodded it with his finger. His father gave him a pitying smile before excusing himself to take a break upstairs. Peeta continued the work of frosting cookies in silence with his brother. They continued quietly for an hour or so when the brothers heard a light rap on the back door. Peeta raised an eyebrow at Clyde.

“Where’s Mom?” Knowing who it was at the door.

“Took Robbie to Mrs. Darven’s. I think she wanted to set him up with Mary. She said she’d be gone all day.” He shrugged. Peeta made for the back door, wiping his hands on his apron more to keep them from shaking than trying to get them clean. 

He opened the door to find Katniss on his porch with the Hawthorne boy slightly behind her. She looked up when the door opened and she gave him a quizzical look. “Where’s your dad?” She asked.

“He’s taking a break.” He answered automatically. “Show me what you brought and I’ll get ask him what he wants to trade.”

She raised her dark eyebrows at him. “Why not just get him so I can show him myself?”

Peeta sighed and waved her in. She didn’t move from the porch. “It’s cold out there. You guys can come in while I get Dad, my mom will gone all day.” They looked skeptical, but came in to stand just inside the door.

Peeta called up the stairs for his dad and waited by the back door around their guests. His eyes roamed to Katniss more often than not, but he couldn’t bring himself to talk to her. When the bell rang in the storefront, Peeta glanced ruefully towards it. He didn’t want to leave the room if Katniss was there, but someone needed to help the customer.

“Don’t worry, I got it.” Clyde said, giving Peeta a suggestive waggle of his eyebrows as he passed. Peeta swatted at him with the back of his hand and cried out when his injured hand made contact with his shoulder. He’d forgotten about his injury.

“What happened to your hand?”

Peeta jerked his head around at her voice, stunned that she was actually speaking to him. He gaped at her for a moment before flashing her a hesitant smile. “I, uh, messed up the rolls.” He laughed.

Both Katniss and the Hawthorne boy- Gale, Peeta remembered- just stared at him. He held up his hand for them to see and tried to explain, smiling. “Mom didn’t appreciate my contribution to dinner last night. She’s uh, surprisingly quick for her age and stature.”

Katniss twisted her face into a disgusted frown and for a frightening second, he thought she was disgusted with him. “You’re mom hit you?” He nodded with a grim smile. “For messing up the bread?” She asked incredulously.

“Yep.” He answered cheerfully. “Welcome to my lovely family.” He added sarcastically.

She gave him a look just as Hawthorne- Gale, he reminded himself- started laughing hysterically. He replayed what he’d said in his mind and blanched.  _ God, _ he thought,  _ could I be any more pathetic? _ He decided to move to the worktable and continue decorating the cake someone had ordered for a birthday. His dad was sure taking his good old time getting down the stairs.

Katniss wandered over to where he was working and inspected his work. He could feel her hovering beside him and it made it difficult to concentrate. He set his pastry bag down and turned to face her. She was much closer than he’d originally thought. She started when their eyes met. He smiled at her and he could see her cheeks colored slightly.

“Prim likes to look at the cakes when we come into town.” She explained defensively. “I’ve never seen anyone actually make one.”

His smile widened. “I do all the cakes. Most of the cookies, too.”

Just then his dad thundered down the stairs and Peeta cursed inwardly. This is the most he’s ever spoken to Katniss and he was really enjoying it.

“Katniss! Gale!” His father greeted as he approached. “What did you bring for me today?”

“Got a couple squirrels, Mr Mellark,” Gale answered, leading him to the porch. Katniss followed and Peeta’s mood went with her. It was a good fifteen minutes before his dad came back in. He looked up and was surprised to see Katniss close behind. 

His father shrugged his shoulders, “Forgot the money. Stay here, Katniss, while I go grab some coins. Peeta, why don’t you wrap up a few cookies for her to take with her. I saw her eyeing the yellow ones.” He winked as he passed and Peeta felt his face heat.

Katniss was looking to him expectantly and he made his way to the tray of cookies waiting to go into the display cases. He waved her over to join him, grabbing a bag and flipping it open.

“Which ones do you want?” He asked cheerfully.

Her eyes widened as she looked at the selection. “How many can I have?” She asked softly.

“Uh…” He scratched his head, unsure how many his father intended to give away.

“Three.” His father answered from the door. He made his way over to Katniss and handed her a few coins. “That one squirrel was pretty big.”

“Okay.” She said and she pointed to a couple for Peeta to place in the bag. She seemed to hesitate on the remaining and Peeta suggested his favorite, excluding that the reason was that the flower it was inspired by would look good in her dark hair.

By the time she left, Peeta was feeling a little light headed. And giddy. He suddenly felt like being with Katniss wasn’t such an impossible feat. He could imagine being her friend and tried to conjure up images of her laughing with him as he worked in the bakery. His father gave him an encouraging smile before returning upstairs. Clyde returned to the back and the day went on as normal. Although, Peeta’s mood was considerably brighter.


	2. An Awkward Beginning

It had been weeks since the incident at the bakery with Peeta. It unsettled Katniss how much she thought about it. Never before had this boy talked to her, or even acknowledged  her presence. And no, she wasn’t going to think about the day in the rain with the burnt bread and the black eye he’d had the next day. Did his mom beat him for that, too? She knew the answer. She thought about his self-deprecating smile when he’d told her how he’d hurt his hand. He’d smiled at her a lot when she was there.

She remembered when she wandered over to take a look at the cake he was working on. Prim had always dragged her to the window to look at them and she was curious to see how they were made. And then he’d turned those blue eyes on her and flashed that lopsided smile. She hated it. It gave her this weird feeling. It made feel as if her heart was going to do something stupid, like fly out of her chest. Gale teased her about it on the way home. She hated the way it made her cheeks hot.

She purposefully avoided hunting squirrels for a couple weeks, embarrassed to go back to the bakery and show her face. Not that it mattered, though, she still saw him at school. When she snuck glances at him throughout the day, he was already looking at her. It was creepy, she told herself. She had just gotten over feeling weird about the whole thing when the most peculiar thing happened.

It was at the end of the math class they shared. The final bell had just rung and students were rushing to get out of the classroom. Mr. Kinley's voice rang out over the buzz.

“Mr. Mellark, Ms. Everdeen, please stay behind!”

Peeta’s shoulders slumped forward as he stopped just short of the door. He turned to meet her gaze before trudging to the front of the class. Katniss followed reluctantly making sure to keep plenty of space between her and the baker’s son.

Thankfully, Mr. Kinley addressed Peeta first. “Peeta, I’m sure I don’t have to tell you that your grades have fallen since the last grading period.” Peeta shrugged and gave him a small smile. “You remember what we talked about.” He nodded and looked at the ground.

“Are my grades low, too?” Katniss asked uncertainly. Last she remembered, she had received top marks.

“Ah, no.” Mr. Kinley said, shifting his focus on her. “Quite the opposite, really. You are among the top of your class. I’ve asked you to stay because I’d like to ask a favor. Peeta and I had an agreement. Keep his grades up this year, or I would make him get a tutor. Obviously, he’s failed his end of the bargain. Which brings us here. I’d like you to assist Peeta for the remainder of the school year.”

Peeta avoided her gaze when she looked at him. He seemed embarrassed. But why had Mr. Kinley asked her? Surely, there were other, more qualified people to tutor him. “I, uh, don’t think I can help much. I’m not a teacher.” She confessed.

“That’s quite alright, Katniss.” He assured her. “Just spend a few hours a week reviewing the material with him and I think he’ll be fine.”

Peeta looked up sharply. “A few hours a week?” He asked. “I don’t have that kind of time, I have to work the bakery.”

“And I have to take care of my family!” Katniss interjected.

Mr. Kinley held up his hands to dispel the outbursts. “Now, now. A few hours a weeks isn’t really that much time if you think about it. Start with an hour every other day and then you can adjust the time according to your needs.” He turned to address Peeta fully. “Peeta, you have until midterms to show me your progress. I’ll leave you two to sort out the details.”

It was the last class of the day and Mr. Kinley seemed eager to be rid of them as he shooed them from the classroom and closed the door behind them. Both students were rendered speechless and stood in the deserted hallway looking at anything but each other.

“Okay,” Peeta said eventually, turning his blue eyes to her. “How do you want to do this?”

Katniss whipped her head around to meet his stare and narrow her eyes. “What do you mean? I thought we both established we don’t have time for this.”

Peeta coughed into his hand in a nervous gesture. “Well, uh,” He confessed. “This isn’t the only class I’ve fallen behind on... “

“Why should I care? I have better things to do than hold your hand through the semester!” She said indignantly.

His face fell for a split second before it hardened into a glare. “You think I don’t have stuff to do?”

Katniss scoffed.  _ Typical merchant kid _ , she thought. “Whatever you  _ have _ to do, I’m sure your family’s lives don’t depend on it!” She shouted out him, wincing when she heard her voice echoing of the walls. She lowered her voice, but kept the venom. “All of my free time is devoted to ensuring my family doesn’t  _ starve _ to death. So excuse me for not wanting to use that time to tutor you.”

She saw the guilt etch its way into his features as he looked down at the floor. He looked miserable. She had expected him to shout back, but he just stood there, listening to her and actually looking remorseful. He looked up from his shoes and his piercing gaze shocked her.

“I’m sorry,” He said after a moment. “I didn’t mean-” He paused as the sound of footsteps sounded around the corner. They saw a teacher approach and then turn into one of the classrooms. Once alone, he continued. “I didn’t mean to imply my work is more important than yours. I know it isn’t. Not even close. What you do for your family is amazing... I’ve just... been a little stressed out lately.”

Katniss studied him as he apologized. She had always assumed merchant kids were all the same. Haughty, rich, and privileged. She’d automatically hated them for their status- for always having enough food to eat, for never being overworked in the mines, for never having to take tesserae in order to survive. She was confused by this boy in front of her. Wasn’t he supposed to sneer at her and put her down for being Seam? She had been so caught up in studying him, that she almost missed when he spoke.

“Don’t worry about it, Katniss.” He said with a small smile. “I’ll find someone else to help.” He laid a hand on her shoulder and squeezed once in reassurance before turning and walking away.

If she was surprised before, now she was utterly astonished. When was the last time someone other than her sister gave her any sort of comfort? She didn’t even know this boy; he had validated her efforts of keeping her family alive  _ and _ taken this unexpected burden from her shoulders. Why would he do that? Surely someone like Peeta Mellark wouldn’t place her needs above his own. Merchants never did that.

“Wait!” She spoke before thinking about what exactly she was going to say. She jogged the few yards to catch up to him. Peeta was waiting for her, a hopeful smile aimed at her. When she came to stand in front of him, she found herself apologizing. “I’m sorry I yelled at you.” She frowned at her own words. What was she doing, exactly?

“It’s okay, I deserved it.” Peeta chuckled. And Katniss hated the way it made her breath quicken and a smile tug at her lips. 

“Well, I…” She paused, trying to come up with something to say. “I’m not really  _ that _ busy in the afternoons. I think I can help you out then.”

His face lit up. “Really?” He asked hopefully.

She sighed, already regretting her hasty decision. “Sure. We can start tomorrow after school. Do you want me to come to the bakery?”

“No!” He shouted with a panicked look on his face. Katniss was taken aback at his sudden outburst. It made sense to her, she knew where it was. She was sure he didn’t know where she lived in the Seam. “No,” he said much more calmly. “My mom can’t know I’m falling behind in my classes. She’ll-” 

She waited for him to finish the sentence, but it was obvious he wasn’t going to by the way he clamped his mouth shut. His mom would... what? Beat him? She instantly looked down at his hand, where he had had an angry welt. It was gone now, but she remembered what he’d said.

“How about I come over to you house?” He asked before she could address the subject.

“You don’t know where I live.” She stated.

He chuckled again, and Katniss frowned at her reaction to it. “True.” He said. “But, we’re both going to be in school tomorrow. I can walk to your house with you.”

Katniss fought the rising panic in her chest. Her house? Peeta was going to come to her house? She wanted to protest, to avoid the shame of showing him her pathetic shack of a home. But another part grew indignant.  _ Let him see what people in the Seam have to live with. Let him see how we struggle, _ she thought.

“Fine.” She agreed and turned to leave, trying to ignore the way his grin was pulled up higher on one side.

“See you tomorrow!” He said cheerfully from behind her. She didn’t bother to turn around and wave in farewell. She was too embarrassed by the flush of her face.

* * *

 

When she arrived home, her mother was sitting with a patient at the kitchen table. She held a slightly bloody cloth to his arm and spoke to him in low tones. Katniss ignored them and joined Prim on the sofa. She was doing homework, but looked up when Katniss sat down on the cushion.

“I tried waiting for you after school.” She whispered. “But Rory wanted to go home. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Katniss reassured her. “I got held up.”

“By what?” 

“I’ll tell you in a bit. Finish your homework, Prim.”

Prim rolled her eyes, but did as she was told. They worked side by side for awhile in silence. The only noises coming from the kitchen and the demon cat that sat on Prim’s feet. Katniss finished her schoolwork relatively quickly but remained on the sofa. She would normally start preparing dinner for the three of them, but her mother was still with the patient. So she sat on the couch, trying to avoid thinking about the baker’s son and the ridiculous idea of tutoring him.

When Prim finished her homework, she raced to the kitchen to help their mother. The patient left shortly after, handing her mother some coins and a multitude of apologies for the deficit. Her mother shooed him away, claiming to be fine and reviewing the ways he can care for his injury at home. Finally, the strange man was gone and they could get on with their nightly routine. Prim helped Mrs. Everdeen clear the table as Katniss gathered ingredients for the dinner they had planned in advance. Her mouth watered as she chopped the vegetables. 

Vegetables were rare this time of year. There was one greenhouse in the district that served for the merchants and of course, the supplies that came on Capitol trains. Out of season, though, they were a bit pricey. Katniss was lucky to be able to trade for them. She had brought them home as a surprise and a treat. The kitchen filled with sounds of rhythmic chopping and the graceful voice of her sister. 

Katniss waited patiently for Prim to recount every moment of the day with them before addressing her mother. “Hey, Mom?” 

“Yes, dear?” Her mother replied automatically.

“I, uh, agreed to tutor someone. So I’m going to bring him over tomorrow after school.” She tried so hard to make it sound unimportant, but Prim was sharp and caught on to one of her words.

“ _ Him _ ?” She asked excitedly, raising her eyebrows as high as they would go. “Who is it?”

“It’s nobody, Prim.” She turned to face her mom. “Is that okay?” Her voice almost a challenge.

“Of course, Katniss. Is he going to stay for dinner?”

Katniss rolled her eyes. “I hope not. Besides, he probably wouldn’t even if we payed him. He’s a merchant kid.”

Her mother shrank back like she’d been stung and Katniss had to replay her words over in her head before catching the reason for her reaction. She resisted the urge to comfort her mother and turned back to prepping the meal.

“Who is it?” Prim asked again, pleadingly.

Katniss sighed heavily as she took in her sister’s face. she could never say no to Prim. “It’s Peeta Mellark, the baker’s son.”

Prim squealed in delight. “Oh, Katniss! Peeta is  _ so _ handsome! All the girls at school think so!”

She stared at her sister in confusion. Why would she care what he looked like? But her cheeks heated as she conjured him up in her thoughts and appraised him approvingly.

“Well, if he’s a Mellark, you can bet he’ll be polite.” Their mother said pointedly. “Katniss, let’s save those vegetables for tomorrow in case Peeta decides he wants to stay for dinner tomorrow.”

“He won’t.” Katniss stated, glaring at her mother.

“You don’t know that.” She countered. Katniss yielded and gathered the chopped up vegetables- a treat after a particularly good hunting day- and set them aside. She made a mental note to replace them in the insulated lock box they kept on the porch to keep them fresh until tomorrow.

The rest of the night went silently. Katniss glared at her plate of game, gruel, and tesserae bread. She stomped her way to bed after they finished and tried to fall asleep quickly. It was hard to fall asleep though with the noises of Prim and her mother cleaning the house as much as they could.

The next day was torture. Katniss could feel his eyes on her throughout the day, but every time she looked up, he was looking away. She cursed herself when it happened for the tenth time.

“Are you okay?” Madge said beside her. They had been eating lunch silently as usual, so Katniss was surprised when Madge spoke up.

“I’m fine. Why?

Madge shrugged her shoulders and pursed her lips. “You just seem edgy. And you cursed. I don’t think I’ve ever heard you curse.”

Katniss stared at her, mortified. Had she said that out loud? She was sure she said it in her head. What else had she said out loud? “I’m fine.” Was all she could manage to say. She was grateful when Madge didn’t push the subject.

After school, Katniss waited in the front entrance for Prim. She showed up faster than she normally did. She smiled brightly at her older sister when she reached her.

“I have to wait for Peeta,” Katniss told her. “You walk home with the Hawthorne’s.” To be honest, Katniss wasn’t sure how long she would have to wait for Peeta. They hadn’t agreed on a time the day before, and she had been avoided him all day. He seemed smart enough to figure it out.

“I want to wait for Peeta, too!” She exclaimed, barely containing her bounce of joy.

Katniss rolled her eyes and was about to shoo her away when she saw him approach from the corner of her eye. He waved a hand in greeting, the ever-present smile still plastered to his lips as he approached.

“Hi, Peeta!” Prim greeted excitedly. “Are you really coming over to our house?”

Peeta laughed and readjusted the strap of his backpack on his shoulder. “I sure am!”

Prim squealed in delight. Katniss glared at Peeta, unsure why she was so mad at him all the sudden. She stalked off for the front doors, not bothering to look back to see if they had followed her. They walked through the streets, snow crunching under their feet. Prim’s face was flushed from the cold as she regaled Peeta with stories of her friends at school. He entertained her, listening intently, stating appropriate “ohs” and “ahs” and even feigned horror when she told him about a boy who pushed her books off her desk last week.

Katniss stared at him over Prim’s head as they walked. He was being so friendly to her sister. A part of heart heart swelled, but the other part hardened in jealousy. Prim was  _ her _ sister. As Prim went into great detail about one of her friends, Peeta looked up and met Katniss’s eyes. His smile was still there, and she vaguely wondered if his cheeks hurt from using the muscles so much. Katniss raised her eyebrows and nodded in Prim’s direction, now slightly ahead of them. She was glad that at that moment, Prim reached back to tap Peeta on the arm, asking him what he thought. When he turned away, Katniss felt her cheeks warm. His mouth had quirked up in that amused, lopsided grin again. It made her feel weird,  _ again. _ She spent the rest of the walk with a scowl on her face.

Her mother was waiting for them at the door. She ushered them in and shut the door behind them, taking coats, hats, gloves and instructing shoes into corners. She greeted Peeta politely and asked if he wanted anything to eat or drink.

“Actually, Mrs. Everdeen,” He replied, pulling a small box from his backpack. “I brought you guys some stuff from the bakery.” He opened the box and pulled out a small cake decorated with colorful icing.

“Oh, Peeta, how thoughtful!” Her mother cried as she accepted the cake from his outstretched hands. “You didn’t have to do that!”

Peeta’s cheeks colored slightly. “It’s a thank you.” He turned to Katniss as if he forgot it was her he should be thanking. “For, uh, helping me.”

“We appreciate it.” Mrs. Everdeen said as she moved to place it on the table. “Would you like to stay for dinner, Peeta?”

“Mom!” Katniss shouted.

Peeta flashed her a mischievous smile. “I would love to, Mrs. Everdeen.” Katniss felt her face drain of color at his words. Peeta at dinner? Nerves worked their way into her muscles and she was afraid that she’d start shaking. “But,” he amended, “I can’t. I have to be back at the bakery before dinner. Thank you for the invitation, though. Maybe next time.”

“Sure.” Her mother answered before motioning Prim to the table and helping her get her homework started.

“Katniss?” Peeta asked expectantly. She snapped her head up to look at him. He was removing a book from his bag and giving her a questioning look. “Ready?” He inquired, waving the math book in front of her face.

Katniss huffed and led him to the sofa where she wedged herself in the corner cushion and crossed her legs to make a table for her book. Peeta sat beside, a little too close for comfort, in her opinion. If she was honest, though, being in her house was too close.

She asked him questions about what they learned that day. She was surprised to find he remembered what they’d talked about in class and even worked out the homework problems on his own. She went further back, questioning him about previous lessons. He knew the answers to those too. She was starting to think he didn’t really need her help. When they finished reviewing the first lesson of the school year, she narrowed her eyes in suspicion.

“You don’t seem to be behind to me.” She accused.

He met her eyes briefly before smiling into his lap. He knew. He knew he didn’t need tutoring and he asked her to do it anyway. He didn’t stop Mr. Kinley from suggesting it. She snapped her book closed with all the strength she could muster.

“Well?” She asked in a low voice so her mother and Prim wouldn’t witness her humiliation at being played by this boy.

He met her cold stare with a warm one. “I don’t need help learning it.” He offered just as quietly. “My grades are slipping because of homework and test grades.”

“If you know it, then why are you failing tests?”

“Only in history and math. The first and last classes of the day.” He said as if it were self-explanatory.

Katniss raised an eyebrow at him.

“My mother has been giving my brother and I extra shifts at the bakery. Clyde got married and moved out. So instead of picking up his shifts, she’s giving them to Robbie and I.” He shrugged. “I don’t get a lot of sleep.” 

“Oh,” Katniss said. “So you fall asleep during tests?”

“I just get distracted.” He corrected and gave her an odd smile before turning to pack his belongings into the bag.

“If you knew you didn’t need help, why are you here?”

There was that odd smile again. He raised an eyebrow in amusement. “Maybe I just wanted to hang out with you, Katniss.”

She couldn’t help the snort erupt from her. Hang out? With her? Prim and her mother shot questioning glances their way before returning to Prim’s papers strewn across the table. She searched Peeta’s expression. There was no malice, no hint of it being a trick to embarrass her. All she could see was warmth and friendly amusement.

“Whatever,” She waved a hand at him and pushed up from the couch. “I think you just wanted to get out working the bakery.”

He shrugged as he lifted himself up to stand beside her. “Maybe. But I convinced my dad that it was a good idea, and he’s made me promise to bring gifts every time I come over.”

“I thought you didn’t want your mom to know.”

“My dad can keep a secret.” He smirked. “Besides, I have a feeling he knows I don’t really need a tutor.”

Katniss raised her brow at his comment, waiting for an explanation. He shook his head at her and moved to the kitchen to say goodbye to Prim and her mother. Katniss followed him to the door and waited patiently as he tugged on his shoes and coat.

“So, Thursday?” He asked casually.

Katniss started in surprise. “You just admitted to not needing a tutor.”

“Doesn’t mean I can’t take advantage of the change in scenery.” He gave her an imploring look. “I’ll bring some loaves of bread. The good kind!”

Katniss sighed and looked away. Real, delicious bakery bread in exchange for an hour with Peeta Mellark? Prim and her mother would appreciate it greatly. She could suffer a few hours a week for that. She had an idea.

“Fine. But you have to promise me to stay awake during your tests. I don’t want to get in trouble for helping you get your grades up. And we work on homework while you’re here.”

A wide grin greeted her when she looked back at him. “Deal. See you later, Katniss!”


	3. Chapter 3

Peeta practically ran home. Not even his mother’s wrath could sour his mood. Katniss Everdeen had agreed to “tutor” him! He had been afraid when she saw through his charade of falling behind in his studies. But he couldn’t,  _ wouldn’t _ , ever outright lie to her. Even misleading her into thinking he needed help with his schoolwork had made him uneasy.

The bell over the bakery door chimed as Peeta rushed inside and ran straight into the kitchen where he stripped off his winter coat and donned an apron before sitting at the worktable. His father was sitting across from him, kneading some nutty bread dough. Peeta met his eyes and couldn’t restrain the laugh that burst from his lips. God, he was happy. His father quirked an eyebrow.

“I take ‘tutoring’ went well at the Everdeen’s?” He asked quietly, although Robbie was in the storefront and couldn’t possibly overhear.

“She knows I’m not stupid, but she agreed to see me once on a while. I’m going over Thursday and promised to bring some bread.” He told him.

“You’re going to pay for it, right?” His father asked as he set aside the kneaded dough and pointed to the prep space. Peeta got the hint and went to the sink to grab the cleaning rag. “I would be glad to supply it if you really needed help, but I know what you’re up to. Are you going to be able to convince Robbie to switch shifts with you?”

Peeta began wiping down the wood countertop. The smile displaying how pleased he was with himself. “Yes, and yes. And I’ve already convinced Delly to cover for me. If Mom or Robbie ever ask where I am, tell them I went to the Cartwright’s.”

“Oh, what’s this? Peeta keeping secrets from Mom?” Robbie asked from the doorframe.

Peeta went still. His panic evident from across the room. “Robbie.” Their father admonished. “Not a word or I’ll tell your mother what, exactly, you get up to when you go out for deliveries. Get back to the counter.”

Now it was Robbie’s turn to pale. He growled in annoyance and stomped off to the storefront.

“Thanks, Dad.” Peeta mumbled as he returned to his chore. His father’s threat doing little to quench the fear rising inside him. His mom had always had an irrational hate for people from the Seam, but it seemed she hated the Everdeen’s even more than most. Which didn’t make sense considering Mrs. Everdeen was a merchant kid before she married Katniss and Prim’s father. He still remembered the day when he was seven and came home after admiring Katniss all day declaring, “I’m going to marry her!” His mother had laughed cruelly and spit at him, saying he wasn’t going to marry some “Seam brat.” He didn’t even want to think about what would have happened if she had found out that bread he’d burned five years ago was for Katniss.

“Don’t worry about Robbie.” His father said with a wink. “He won’t risk you mother finding out he uses the deliveries to sneak out with his latest conquests.”

Peeta gave his father a reassuring smile, letting him know he’d heard before throwing himself into his work. Dinner was quiet, as always, even more so without Clyde there to make light conversation. After cleanup, Peeta rushed to his room and pulled out his unfinished homework. He was dead tired, but his promise to Katniss echoed in his thoughts and had nagged him all throughout the afternoon. He finished it sloppily, replaced it in his bag and turned out his light.

The bang on his door wrenched him from his dream. It was pitch black outside. He waited for his eyes to adjust to the darkness before looking to his clock. Four eighteen. Crap. He was supposed to be in the bakery at four. He scrambled out of bed, blindly reaching for a shirt and pants. Downstairs, he could hear someone moving about. He hastily dressed and made his way quickly into the bakery kitchens. His father was at the oven, coaxing the fire to burn brighter.

“Dad, this is my shift, go back to bed.” He said as he slipped his apron on and scanned the dough waiting to be baked.

His father straightened. “I just wanted to make sure you got everything started okay. Your mother kicked me out of bed when she didn’t hear you down here.”

“I’ll be fine, go back to bed.” He reiterated. His father waved him off and headed back towards the stairs. Groggily, Peeta began the routine of placing loaves in the oven, separating dough into rolls and beginning to mix up the confectionary goods. Over the years, it had become second nature to him and he was glad to not have to think too much about it so early in the morning. Six o’clock came around sooner than he expected and he opened the storefront and waited on the long line of morning patrons. By seven o’clock, Robbie took over for a few minutes while Peeta ran upstairs to wash and gather his supplies for school.

His mother had, thankfully, left him a plate of eggs on the table and he devoured them quickly, ignoring their cooled temperature. His father was sitting next to him, sipping from a mug. His father used to joke that he couldn’t do even the most basic of tasks without his coffee. Peeta thought about his first class of the day and knew it could give him the energy he needed to focus on Mrs. Larnig’s droning voice.

“Is that coffee?” Peeta asked, already knowing the answer. The promise he made to Katniss was still fresh in his mind. He needed to pass his history quiz today.

“Why? You want some?” His father asked suspiciously. “I didn't’ think you liked it.”

“I don’t, but I need a jolt.”

His father shrugged and nodded to the cupboard where they kept their dishes. Peeta quickly grabbed a mug and filled it with the black liquid. Steam rose lazily from the glass. He blew on it as he retook his seat and chanced a sip. It was incredibly hot and bitter. He sputtered.

His father chuckled. “Here,” he said as he pushed a small ceramic jar closer across the table. “Put some honey in it.”

He put a spoonful in, stirred, and tasted it. He repeated this process twice before the bitter coffee became manageable to drink. After the second long sip, Peeta sighed. The warmth spread from his stomach through his limbs and outward to his extremities, and his mind begin to clear.

“Peeta,” His mother called unhappily from the other room. “Tomorrow you better get up when you’re supposed to! Otherwise-” She stopped at the sight of them in the kitchen, sipping from their mugs. She turned cold eyes on her husband. “Paul! Did you give him coffee? You know how expensive that stuff is!”

“Oh, let him have it, Sudie.” Her husband sighed. “If he’s going to work the opening shift, he needs something to keep him awake at school.”

Sudie huffed her annoyance and stomped down the stairs. With Clyde gone and Peeta becoming an absolute screw up in her eyes, Peeta supposed Robbie was her new favorite son. Father and son drank their coffee in silence. When his mother yelled up the stairs telling him to “get his ass to school,” Peeta waved farewell to his father and did as he was told.

Thanks to the coffee, he was fully aware of his surroundings while in his history class. He was sure he aced the quiz, and Mrs. Larnig’s voice didn’t seem quite as boring and lifeless as it usually did. Despite the vitality he received from the coffee wearing off before lunch, he felt almost weightless. Peeta could feel his life changing for the better. In the lunch room, he noticed her instantly. Sitting at the remote table and, surprisingly, Madge wasn’t sitting with her today. He glanced around for her, but she was nowhere to be found. He studied Katniss from afar, feeling his chest tighten when he saw her measly lunch.

“Dude,” Mark said beside him. “You look like wounded puppy. What gives?”

Peeta straightened in his seat and face his friend. “She’s sitting all alone.” Mark would know who he was talking about. He was the only one he could ever talk to about Katniss. His lifelong friend had known about Peeta’s crush since they were five. “Maybe I should go sit with her.” He whispered.

Mark snorted. “It’s your funeral, man.”

Peeta glared at his friend. “I don’t care what people think about me.” He hissed, not wanting to be overheard. He might not care that people saw him talking to her, but he wasn’t sure he could face the incessant teasing for loving a girl who wanted nothing to do with him.

Mark dropped his smile. “I only meant that she doesn’t talk to anyone besides Madge, and even then it isn’t much. She’ll rip your throat out if you go over there.”

“Not if I bring a peace offering.” Peeta said, anger forgotten as he wagged his eyebrows and held up his stack of shortbread cookies.

Mark laughed again. “Like I said, it’s your funeral.”

Peeta didn’t waste another moment as he surged to his feet. Hardly anyone noticed him do so, and he gathered his lunch and made his way over to her. She saw him coming immediately, face drawn in a frown as he approached. He stood before her, adorning his most charming smile. She ignored him and bent over a book resting on the table.

“Can I sit here?” He asked casually.

She tensed. “There’s no rule against it.”

He took that for a yes and quickly sat down. Up close he could tell that her thermos didn’t hold soup like he’d thought before. He could smell the mint from where he sat. And a piece of tesserae bread in her hand that she nibbled from.

“So, ah-” He gulped. “I think I passed my history test this morning.”

“Good for you.” She said dryly, taking another bite of her roll.

“Where’s Madge?” He asked, trying to get a conversation started.

She shrugged her shoulders without looking up. They sat in silence for another couple of minutes. He could feel her eyes on him, or his lunch rather, when he started unpacking it and spread it in front of him. He could see the envy etched into her expression and felt a pang of remorse. He should have left his lunch at the other table. Or offer her some, but that idea would likely get him some unkind words.

But it would be rude not to. Not to mention he would gladly trade lunches with her for the rest of the year if it meant she didn’t have to suffer. He picked up his orange and held it out to her. “Do you, uh, want my orange?”

The cold glare was expected, but he held the fruit out to her even further. “I don’t need your pity.” She said icily.

Peeta shrugged, ignoring the sting in his chest and trying to come across as nonchalant. “Suit yourself. I only asked because I don’t like them and I’d hate to waste it by throwing it out.”

Her glare intensified and he knew he’d said the wrong thing. Flushing, he set the orange between them, and turned his attention back to his own lunch.

“Why?” She asked suddenly. When he met her eyes, his breath caught. Her gray irises were filled with an intense heat that sent a jolt straight to his groin. He struggled with keeping his mind from imagining what it would be like to kiss her.

He cleared his throat and ended up choking in the process. “Why what?” He wheezed.

“Why are you sitting here? And why do you want to hang out with me?” Her voice was low and laced with accusation.

She’d asked him this yesterday before he left her house. What could he say?  _ Well, Katniss, it just so happens I’ve been in love with you since we were five. _ Ha! She’d probably hit him. Or worse. Maybe he could settle for telling her he wanted to be friends? It was true; he found her interesting and had been wanting to find something in common with her since the moment he heard her sing.

He cleared his throat, hoping it would dispel his nervousness. “Maybe I just want to be your friend.” He rolled his eyes inwardly. That sounded childish. “I think you’re… intriguing.” He frowned. It was the first word that popped into his head and now he was sure she thought he was an idiot.

“Intriguing?” Katniss questioned flatly. Peeta nodded weakly in response. “You find me  _ intriguing _ ?” He nodded again, stronger this time. “And the fact that we  _ just _ had a vocabulary test in Language, and  _ intriguing _ was one of the words, is a coincidence?”

Peeta scratched the back of his head and averted his eyes. it was true that he had remembered that word from the test just an hour ago, but he really did find Katniss interesting. “Well, uh, maybe. But it’s still true! I think you’re interesting and I just wanted to get to know you. You never talk to anyone besides Madge and that Hawthorne guy-”

“Gale.” Katniss supplied. She said it so fiercely, that Peeta was afraid that there was something  _ more _ to them than friendship. He pushed the thought aside. Telling himself that even if there was something between the two, he still wanted to be friends with Katniss. He just wanted to know her.

“Gale,” He corrected. “Besides him and Madge, everyone thinks you’re intimidating. I want to get to know the  _ real _ Katniss.” He flashed her a broad grin.

She was still frowning, although now it looked like she was trying to figure him out. “People really find me intimidating? I don’t even talk to anyone!”

“I think that’s why.”

“I just like to keep to myself. What’s the point of having friends, anyway?” She confessed softly.

Peeta shrugged his shoulders. “To have someone to laugh with. Maybe to help share burdens?” He pushed the forgotten orange towards her and gave her his most reassuring smile.

His heart soared when she took the fruit and began to peel the rind away. After a couple bites, she turned her attention back to him. “You really just want to be my friend?”

“Yes.” He said certainly. Katniss eyed him warily and he wondered if she would ever trust him. “There are perks to being my friend, you know.”

One of her dark eyebrows rose. “Oh?”

He smirked at her and held up one of his shortbread cookies. Her eyes widened. “And there’s more where that came from. Remember, I promised to bring you bread tomorrow.”

Her eyes narrowed and she huffed out an annoyed sigh. “Peeta, you don’t have to give me anything. I can take care of myself and my family just fine.”

“I know.” He answered gently as he slid the cookie across the table to her. “I’m not offering to put you on the spot or point anything out to you or make you feel inadequate. I’m doing this because I want to. It’s what friends do.”

Katniss hesitated slightly before reaching for the cookie. Her cold fingers grazed his for a brief second and Peeta wished he could hold it to warm it up. She nibbled on it as she frowned into her book. After a few moments of what he hoped was internal debate in his favor, she nodded.

“Okay, Mellark. Friends.” She gave him a rare, nervous smile and Peeta was sure there was no way he could contain his joy. He looked down to hide his silly grin.

“Great.” He said as he stifled his elation.

Lunch was over quickly after that, but Peeta was too excited to bemoan the fact that he didn’t get to ask any of the questions he’d been dying to ask her for years. Mark caught up with him on the way to their next class and clapped him on the back.

“I have to admit, I was scared for you when you first sat down with her.” He said to Peeta in a low, but amused voice. “I saw her smile at you, how’d you manage that one?”

Peeta laughed in response. “I just told her she only ever talked to Madge and Hawthorne and that I wanted to be friends with her. It took a lot more convincing than I’m used to.”

“She’ll come around, they all do. Katniss will be eating out of your hands before too long. Just like Delly.”

Peeta stopped in the hallway, causing Mark to stop as well. When his friend turned back to him, a frown was set on Peeta’s lips. “Katniss is different. I don’t want her to fawn over me. And I didn’t want Delly to fawn over me either. I’ve only ever had eyes for Katniss and I really just want to be her friend. Even if she never has feelings for me, I still want to be near her.”

Mark drew his mouth into a thin line. “Sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just, I don’t think there’s anyone in the entire  _ district  _ that doesn’t like you. You’re hard to dislike.”

Peeta held his tongue. He didn’t want to mention how his mother and older brothers seemed to be indifferent towards him at best.

“I think you have a shot.” Mark continued reassuringly. “It’s not like she’s ever had a boyfriend. She might be curious.” He finished with a wink.

Peeta started forward again and narrowed his eyes, thinking back to the way Katniss had corrected him about Gale. “I don’t know. She seems close to the Hawth- Gale.”

“Gale Hawthorne?” Mark asked. “I’ve seen him with more girls than Robbie.”

Peeta was conflicted. On the one hand this piece of news elated him. If Gale was with other women, then he wasn’t with Katniss. On the other hand, what if Katniss was one of those girls? She didn’t seem the type to mess around without commitment, if at all. Katniss was… Pure.

He contemplated his findings all afternoon, sneaking glances at Katniss to see if he could get a read on her. She seemed different. She was definitely more aware of him now. Many times when he turned his head slightly to look at her, he met her eyes briefly before they flittered away. Once, he thought he saw her blush.

After school, Peeta was on his way to the front door when he saw Prim standing in the hall. She was rising to the tips of her toes and scanning the crowd. For Katniss, he was sure. He made his way over to her.

“Hey, Prim, looking for Katniss?” He asked when he reached her.

“Hi, Peeta!” She greeted with a wide smile and rocked back onto her heels, halting her search. “Yes, I am. I can’t wait to tell her all about today! Are you coming over again?”

Peeta chuckled. “No, not today. But I’ll be over tomorrow. I’m bringing some bread, too. What kind do you want?”

Prim’s eyes lit up. “Really?” Peeta nodded and Prim put her fist to her chin in concentration. “The white kind, I guess.” She finally answered.

“Okay,” Peeta said, raising an eyebrow. “What else?”

Prim jolted in surprise. “You mean we can have more than one loaf?”

“Yes! Now tell me what your favorite bread is.”

“Oh! Can you bring the kind that has the cinnamon with the nuts and raisins?” She pleaded.

“Of course,” he chuckled. He glanced sideways just in time to see Katniss make her way towards them.

“Katniss!” Prim exclaimed when she spotted her sister. “Did Peeta tell you he was bringing bread when he comes to see us tomorrow?”

Katniss raised one eyebrow. “He mentioned it.” She said carefully.

“He said we can have any kind we want!” She explained. “I told him I wanted the cinnamon kind!”

“What’s your favorite, Katniss?” Peeta asked.

She seemed to think on it a moment before answering. “A regular loaf is fine. We can have it with a few different meals.”

Peeta drew his face into a mock scowl. “That’s not what I asked, Katniss. Which kind is your favorite?”

Katniss frowned at him. “The cinnamon one, like Prim said. So you might as well just bring a regular loaf so we can have some variety.”

He didn’t know how, but he knew she was lying. He rolled his eyes. “Whatever you say. See you two tomorrow.”


	4. Bonding

As the weeks went by, Katniss found herself more and more bemused. Peeta had continued to walk home with her and Prim on Tuesdays and Thursdays. And he always brought something. Loaves of bread, cookies, tiny cakes, danishes. When they got to their house in the Seam, Prim would work at the table with their mother while Peeta and Katniss did their homework on the couch. They conversed softly to keep up the appearance of tutoring to Mrs. Everdeen. The topics were always light hearted, with Peeta doing the most talking and Katniss struggling to resist his charm. She felt uneasy divulging personal details with him. Every day he was there, she convinced herself that he was practically a stranger, that they didn’t know each other and that she should not answer his invasive questions.

It wasn’t until months later, a week before midterms, before Katniss realized that Peeta was no longer a stranger. Her one-word responses became longer and longer- until they were both contributing equally to their conversations. Prim adored him. He listened to her stories with apt attention while Katniss rolled her eyes at her sister’s “problems.” At some point, Gale and his brothers had started walking home with them. Gale was hesitant at first, keeping a wary eye on the baker’s son the whole way and shooting meaningful glances at Katniss before they went inside. She knew those looks, he used them when they hunted to signify possible danger ahead.

He eventually warmed up to Peeta. Although, he was still wary and wasn’t exactly friendly towards him. He politely answered Peeta’s curious questions, asked a few of his own, but spent most of the walks listening to him interact with Prim like Katniss did.

In school, things hadn’t changed much. Peeta still kept with his own friends most days, but when Madge was absent, he joined her for lunch and shared his sweets. She definitely noticed him looking at her. At first when they would meet eyes, both of them would look away quickly. It was a subtle shift. Peeta would hold her gaze until she looked away, and occasionally, he’d give her small smile or an eye roll behind a teacher’s back.

It was the Thursday before their midterm exams. Peeta, Katniss, Prim and Gale (and his brothers) were walking towards the Seam from school. As usual, Prim was talking Peeta’s ears off.  _ How does she have so much to say? _ Katniss thought. Peeta was listening good-naturedly, interjecting comments and praises when he saw fit. She couldn’t help but admire him. He was so  _ nice _ to everyone. She felt Gale nudge her ribs.

“Ow.” She scowled, looking sideways at her hunting partner.

“You were drooling.” He teased.

“I was not!” She hissed as she felt her face heat.

“It’s okay, Catnip. I can understand. He’s great with Prim; not bad looking either.” He laughed softly at her uneasy expression. “But, be careful. He’s still a Merchant kid.”

Katniss stopped in her tracks, snapping her head to the side to look at him. Was Gale implying that she had  _ feelings _ for Peeta? Preposterous! She would admit that Peeta is a nice guy, and as Gale said, not bad looking. Handsome, even. And he  _ was _ really good with Prim. But she did not,  _ would not _ , think of Peeta that way. They might be friends but that was it. Katniss had no intention of becoming romantically involved. With anyone. Ever.

“I don’t  _ like _ him. He’s my friend. That’s it.” She stated quietly, giving him her best glare.

Gale rolled his eyes skyward. “Okay, Catnip, if you say so. I just don’t want you to get hurt.”

“Well, you have nothing to worry about since there is  _ nothing _ between us.” She said before stalking off after the group that had left them behind. Peeta caught her eye as she caught up, an eyebrow raised in curiosity. She shook her head at him and refused to meet his eyes the rest of the way home.

“So, next week is midterms,” Katniss stated cautiously when they sat on the couch in her house. The completed homework lay on their laps. Their “arrangement” was quickly coming to an end.

Peeta slipped his book into his bag. “Yeah...” He said without meeting her eyes. It bothered her, she realized, because she was so used to seeing his blue irises when she so much as glanced at him. Now he was avoiding her gaze purposefully.

“I guess things will go back to normal.” She ventured, not knowing why she was annoyed by his answer. “You’ll go back to the bakery and since we don’t really speak in school...” 

“What? No!” Peeta exclaimed as he whipped his head in her direction and she was rewarded with the flash of blue. His face softened out of it’s perplexion and he scratched his head in an innocent manner. “I mean, I don’t want things to go back the way they were. I like being your friend, Katniss.”

She managed a small smile. “Me too, but if your grades improved, which we both know they have, that means you don’t need a tutor anymore.”

“That doesn’t mean we have to stop being friends.” He argued.

“Oh?” She narrowed her eyes. “So when we go back to school the Monday after midterms, you’re just going to start talking to me like you do your other friends?”

Peeta opened his mouth to argue, but Katniss cut him off. “We’ve been ‘friends’ for a months now, Peeta, and the only times you’ve ever talked to me in school is when Madge is absent or with her other friends.” She hadn’t realized how much she resented the fact they were only friends when it was convenient for him.

“It’s not because I don’t want to.” He stated softly. It caught Katniss off guard. She was wholly prepared for an argument. There he was, unnerving her again. She wasn’t sure how to handle him.

“Whatever.” She decided to say. It still hurt, that he seemed ashamed to be her friend in school. Even if he denied it, it didn’t ease the pang in her heart. She pushed up from the couch and strode to the door, holding it open for him when he followed reluctantly.

“Katniss-”

“Good luck on your midterms, Peeta.” She said icily before slamming the door. She walked back to the kitchen and was greeted by two worrisome faces.

“What’s wrong, Katniss?” Prim asked, her delicate face pinched in concern.

“Nothing.” She said distractedly and began on the preparations for dinner. The fine bakery bread,  _ his bread _ , was mocking her from the table as she cooked. During the hour it took to prepare their soup, she managed to cut her finger, lose one of the potatoes and almost burn her eyebrows off. She concluded that nothing good could ever happen when thinking about Peeta Mellark.

* * *

 

Katniss successfully avoided him the next day in school; and on Saturday, when Gale managed to snare good-sized squirrel, she begged him to go to the bakery without her. By the time Monday rolled around, Katniss was determined to put him as far from her mind as possible and focus on her exams. Everyone was certainly doing just that. Even if someone managed to finish any of the exams before the allotted time, students were expected to remain silent. It carried over into lunch hour. It was strictly forbidden to talk to one another about any of the eight Capitol-mandated exams. The eerie silence didn’t bother Katniss. She embraced it and reviewed material for her next exam while she ate.

Friday, the day they received their exam grades, came slowly. Katniss loved the Friday after midterms. If she passed, she was free to leave after she got her scores. She supposed everyone loved that Friday. So she should have expected that everyone would be in a good mood, asking one another about their prospective scores. As it happens, she was completely taken aback when she sat down and Peeta had wandered to her desk in the minutes before the first bell rang.

“Hey, Katniss!” Peeta greeted. “How do you think you did?”

She really wasn’t in the mood to deal with him. She was positive he was just making a point to talk to her after she said he never did. She seethed beneath his towering form as he leaned over her. “Fine.” She ground out.

He leaned back abruptly and drew his eyebrows together. A flicker of sadness in his blue orbs. “Sorry, I just wanted to come and say hi. I’ll talk to you later.”

She sighed and waved her hand to dismiss him and brooded in her seat. She put on her best neutral expression in order to hide her troubled state. She warred with herself. She genuinely believed Peeta was just trying to be nice and be her friend, but Gale’s warning and Peeta’s aloofness at school still burned a spiteful fire in her heart. 

It was no surprise that everyone passed their midterm exams and were allowed to go home. Katniss waited for Prim outside by the front door, enjoying the bright, spring sun. Closing her eyes, she inhaled the sweet scent of renewal and basked in the sun’s warmth. A shadow fell on her and she frowned when it didn’t move. She opened her eyes to see the object of her anger blocking the delicious rays of the sun.

“Katniss,” Peeta addressed her. “I’m sorry about this morning. And about not talking to you more these past few weeks.”

“Okay.” She shot at him. She really didn’t want to be mad at him, but her stubborn side won out. It always won out.

Peeta’s eyes looked away at her detached answer and he shuffled in place for a moment. “Can we take a walk?” He asked earnestly. “I just really need to talk to you.”

Katniss peered around him to the doors, searching for Prim. She really shouldn’t leave her. She was about to decline his offer when she spotted Gale jogging towards them.

“Aced them!” He shouted and he joined them, raising his grading paper in the air.

“Me too,” Peeta said, flashing a smile that wasn’t quite right. Katniss cursed her heart when it panged at the sight. She nodded when the boys looked at her expectantly. What should she do now?

“Hey, Gale,” Peeta said, turning away from her and facing the tan teenager. Katniss had a bad feeling pooling in the pit of her stomach. “Would you mind seeing that Prim gets home? Katniss and I are going on a walk. We shouldn’t be long, but she didn’t want Prim to walk home alone.”

Gale studied him for a moment, frowning. Then he turned his eyes to Katniss and studied her as well. Eventually he sighed and said, “Sure, no problem, Catnip. See you in the morning?”

Katniss nodded, not trusting her voice. She felt Peeta’s fingers close around her arm as he gently led her away from the school. Her anger soared at being drug along, but she waited until they rounded the corner of the first building before whirling on Peeta and stabbing a finger in his face.

“What the hell, Peeta?!” She hissed at him. The alarm in his eyes was evident, but she ignored it. “I wanted to go home with Prim! I don’t have time for this!” She gestured between them, then averted her eyes at his wounded look.

She wasn’t sure how long they stood there, but when she finally found the courage to look up, his eyes were still on her. He ducked his head forward to catch her eye, remaining slouched as he spoke.

“I’m sorry, Katniss.” He whispered gently. “I really needed to talk to you. I shouldn’t have assumed you’d go with me. I promise this won’t take long.”

Katniss released a slow breath, commanding her brain to respond to him and not get lost in his impossible blue eyes. “Fine...” She answered at last. His small smile eased her anger somewhat and Peeta turned to start walking again. It was silent at first. They walked by the buildings surrounding the school and finally to though the rows of houses between the Merchant square and the Seam. She hadn’t realized where they were going before they got there.

The meadow was bright green with dots of yellow springing up here and there. She turned to Peeta and smiled. She told herself it was the meadow that made her heart lift, not the boy beside her. Although, when he answered her smile with that lopsided grin of his, she felt her stomach flutter.

“So,” She said after stamping down her emotions. “You wanted to talk?”

Peeta sat in the long grass at the edge of the meadow and patted the dirt beside him. She sat, making sure to keep plenty of space between them. She stared at Peeta, waiting for him to saw something. She was starting to get nervous about what he could possibly want to talk about. He seemed more troubled as the minutes ticked by before he spoke.

“I just wanted to say how sorry I am for treating you the way I did when we were in school.” He said softly. “I didn’t think you minded that much. If I’m honest, I didn’t think you wanted to be my friend. I sort of thought you were… kidding.”

Katniss pulled her legs up to her chest as she considered him. “I did it for the food.” She confessed softly. She saw the sad, knowing smile on his lips and rushed to continue. “At first! Mom and Prim really enjoyed the bread and it helped. But then I got to know you and I don’t know… Really, you didn’t do anything wrong. I was just upset that we might not be able to hang out anymore.”

He flashed her a real smile before turning his gaze to the blades of grass and fiddling with them. “That’s another thing… Besides school, I won’t be able to see you anymore.”

“Why not?” 

Peeta looked at her for a long moment, seeming to hesitate on what to say. “My mom.”

“What about her, Peeta?” Katniss whispered fiercely, fearing the answer.

Peeta shook his head. “Nothing. I just can’t sneak away from the bakery anymore. I’ll probably get in trouble by not going home straight from school, but Clyde and Winnie were going to the bakery today. I might be able to come up with an excuse.”

She took in the hunch of his shoulders, the pain in his eyes and the words he just spoke. Mrs. Mellark was beating her son, she knew it. “Peeta…”

A sad smile followed by a nervous laugh. “What, Katniss?”

“I hate her.” She said viciously.

Peeta started at her confession. “You don’t know her! She’s not that bad. Really, it’s my fault I can’t-” he stopped abruptly and clamped his jaw shut.

“It’s not your fault.” Katniss said as she impulsively reached for his hand. “Whatever she says to justify her behavior is bullshit. You don’t deserve to be hit by your own mother.”

Confusion flicked across his features as he studied her hand resting on his. “You mean… You mean, your mom doesn’t… Punish you?”

Katniss couldn't keep her mouth from gaping open. “No! Of course not. Not like that!”

“Oh.” He said. “I thought all parents did. At least the moms in the Merchant square. My friend, M-” He paused again. “I have friends whose parents are… physical. But even I have to admit my mom is a bit cruel.”

Suddenly, Katniss was thankful for her birth status. She couldn’t think of anyone from the Seam being beaten by a parent. Was it really so commonplace in the Merchant square? She looked down when she felt his thumb slide over her fingers and she immediately pulled away. Her brain was frantic as she replayed what he had done. He seemed to pick up on her uneasiness. He laughed unexpectedly and threw himself backwards into the grass. She watched him as he bathed in the sun, still confused and scared about what was happening between them. She was quite naive on the subject of love and dating. She wasn’t sure if that was considered flirting or not. All she knew is that she needed to fight off any of his advances. Marriage was not in her future. And it would only hurt both of them if she pretended.

She cleared her throat. “I’m sorry about your mom, Peeta. We can still talk in school, right? Unless... You’re embarrassed by me?”

He sat up and furrowed his brows. “What? I’m not embarrassed by you.”

“Oh,” Katniss stammered. “I just thought…”

His hand reaches up to brush along her cheek and she leaned into it momentarily before flinching back.  _ Get a grip, Katniss!  _ She yelled inwardly.  _ Stop this before you do something stupid, like kiss him! _ Her heart hammered violently in her chest as she stood and faced away from him. She felt him stand up behind her and hover over her shoulder.

“I’m sorry, Katniss, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.” He said softly. “Please, don't think I would ever be embarrassed by you. If anything I thought you would be embarrassed by me… Or annoyed.” He chuckled.

She pondered his words, confused as to what to do or say that will erase the awkwardness between them. She pivoted around and offered him a nervous smile. “You've been apologizing a lot today…”

“And you haven’t accepted any of them.” Peeta teased. 

She felt herself relax at his words, her nervous smile turned into a smirk. “I accept your many apologies, Peeta.” She said mockingly.

He chuckled then looked back down at the ground, his smile fading. “I need to get back to the bakery…”

“Okay.” She told him as she begins walking towards town. The silence between them was comfortable. Katniss reveled in the warm sunshine and couldn’t help the smile that flitted across her face. When they reach the edge of the Merchant square, Peeta hung back in the shadow of a building and brushed his fingers along her arm before gently pulling her to a stop. She gave him a questioning look.

“You should probably head home.” He said, looking down at his shoes.

“Oh,” The disappointment evident in her voice. “I thought-”

“I just don’t want my mom to see you.” He interrupted. “She found out that you were ‘tutoring’ me and she got really mad about it. If I show up late to the bakery, with you, she’ll go berserk.”

Katniss drew her eyebrows together. “What did she do? Did she hit you?” She asked angrily.

“It’s nothing, Katniss. I don’t even think there’s a bruise.” He offered her a tight smile. His hand reached up to touch the back of his head.

Katniss sprung like a jungle cat, turning Peeta so he faced the wall. She inspected the area where his hand had been, eyes narrowed in concentration. It was hard to see anything under his shaggy curls, but after a moment's scrutiny, she spotted a patch of his blonde hair that was slightly darker than the rest. She brought her fingers to the dark spot and brushed his hair back, revealing blue-black skin underneath.

“There  _ is _ a bruise.” She snapped. She pressed her fingers to the spot and he hissed in pain. “Is that the only spot? Did she hit you somewhere else?”

Peeta grabbed her hand and pulled it away from his head as he turned to face her again. “That was the only place she hit me.” He admitted tensely, avoiding her eyes again.

“Peeta,” She warned. She removed her wrist from his grip and took a step back to examine him. She didn’t see any other bruises or cuts. He looked fine.  _ Not all wounds can be seen, _ she remembered her mother saying once.

“I’m fine,” He reiterated. “Really. She got a hold of one of the rolling pins is all.”

“Head injuries can be bad, Peeta. At least let my mom take a look at it.” She implored.

“Katniss, I’m  _ fine _ . I’ve had worse beatings.” He said, pursing his lips and looking remorseful. He probably hadn’t wanted to tell her that.

“Fine. I’ll see you later.” She said softly before brushing past him and hurrying home.

* * *

 

Nothing was the same after that. Peeta kept his word and talked to her at school, joining her and Madge nearly every day for lunch. But the conversations were short and almost forced. Katniss watched for any more signs that he wanted to get closer to her like when they were at the meadow, but he kept his distance. Maybe he wasn’t interested in her like that. She couldn’t ignore the hurt she felt when she came to that conclusion.

The rest of the school year went by quickly and without incident. And even though she spoke to Peeta almost every day, she felt their friendship slipping. It was almost as if he was avoiding her emotionally, but, she had to admit, she was doing the same thing. She was afraid of what might happen if they were alone again. He no longer held her gaze for more than a second. She missed him, even though he never left. Whatever she was feeling, Katniss was afraid of it. She kept telling herself it didn’t matter what she felt, or what he felt, she was never getting married and there would be no point to pursue a relationship.

She and Gale, on the other hand, seemed to be growing closer. They still hunted every day together. She found herself talking to him more now that she didn’t talk to peeta as much. After the incident at the meadow, Katniss explained her worries to Gale, hoping he would have some sort of advice for her. He never did. After awhile, he snapped at her for being so concerned about a Merchant kid and told her to worry about her family and the upcoming reaping instead.

The Reaping. It was only a month away. It would be Prim’s first year, Katniss’s fifth. Her name would be in the Reaping bowl twenty times, if she signed up for tesserae again this year, which was the only option. If she wanted to keep Prim and her mother alive, she had to sign up for it. Her sixteenth birthday was in a few days. She made a mental note to go down to the Justice Building on Thursday after school. 

_ One month, _ she reminds herself.  _ One month until the Hunger Games.  _


	5. Deception

Katniss’ accusations echoed through Peeta’s mind all the way home. Did he really ignore her at school? He didn’t think so. He spent a vast majority of the time staring at her. Maybe she just wanted him to talk to her more. The problem with that was the more he spoke to her, the more he felt like confessing his love for her. He wouldn’t risk her friendship by doing something as stupid as that. He was so distracted by his thoughts, he didn’t notice the stony silence as he entered the bakery kitchens.

“And where have you been?” His mother asked accusingly. Peeta flinched at her voice and drew back instinctively.

“At- at Delly’s!” He answered nervously.

“Is that so?” He nodded. His mother’s glare intensified. “Then how is it when I went to visit Mrs. Cartwright, she said she hadn’t seen you in months? I’m not going to ask you again, Peeta.  _ Where have you been? _ ”

Peeta gulped and broke out into a sweat. He was caught. There was no getting out of this one. He glanced around the kitchen, noticing Robbie for the first time. He was rolling out some cookie dough on the counter, but his eyes were on his brother. Peeta could see the pity in them. Peeta continued searching for the one person who might be able to get him out of this with minor injuries, but his father was nowhere to be seen. He racked his brain for an excuse.

“Peeta,” Robbie spoke up from his workstation, laughing nervously. “Don’t tell me you spent the whole afternoon with Leena!”

Peeta stared at his brother in confusion. Leena? She was Robbie’s year in school and his mother had always gone on and on about how pretty and smart she was. Her fondness probably had more to do with the fact that Leena’s parents were District Officials, the ones who helped coordinate District Affairs with the mayor and were set on the same pedestal. Robbie was giving him an out.

“Ah-” Peeta cleared his throat and straightened into his full height. “Yes, Mom, I was with Leena. I’m sorry.”

“Leena Denworth?” His mother asked skeptically. “You’ve been seeing her?”

“Yes.” Peeta said, shooting a wary glance in Robbie’s direction.

His mother appraised him for a long moment. Her glare was still menacing and Peeta felt like she was towering over him even though they were the same height. Mrs. Mellark’s eyes searched his face and he tried to keep his expression neutral. He could feel the sweat beading between his shoulder blades as his mother assessed him. He fought his base instinct to run away, telling himself that meeting her stare would hide his deception.

“You better not be lying to me, Peeta.” She said at last. “If I find out you’ve been lying, it’ll be the last thing you ever do! You hear me?”

Peeta averted his eyes and nodded mutely. When he gazed back at the woman who raised him, she nodded in return and left the kitchen. He let go a sigh of relief, collapsing onto a stool by the worktable.

“Sorry, Peeta.” Robbie whispered from his spot across the table. “Dad had a delivery and she came home so soon, swearing up a storm.”

Peeta looked at his older brother. They had never been that close, even when they were little. “Why did you cover for me?”

Robbie shrugged cutting the dough into shapes with the cookie cutters. “Guess you owe me one, now.”

He knew it. Robbie had only ever done things for his own gain. And now he was in his debt.

“So where were you really?” Robbie asked innocently.

“None of your business.” Peeta said through clenched teeth.

“If you tell me, I’ll consider us even.” He smirked.

Peeta paused in his work. Could he really trust him like that? Maybe if he just told him, he could stop trying to hide it. He liked hanging out with Katniss and if he was ever going to bring her home as his girlfriend, maybe he should start trying to talk her up.

“I was with Katniss Everdeen.” He supplied.

“Everdeen?” Robbie laughed. “I thought she was a total prude! Nice, Peeta. Maybe she’ll be more friendly now that she’s getting some.”

He felt his mouth gape open. Robbie didn’t seriously believe that Peeta was  _ sleeping _ with Katniss. Did he? “It’s not like that.“ He hissed, his anger rising to new heights. “She’s tutoring me.”

Robbie raised his eyebrows. “Uh-huh,  _ tutoring _ .” The satisfied smirk made Peeta’s blood boil.

_ Ignore him, _ Peeta told himself.  _ He’s just trying to bait you. _ And that’s what he did. He ignored Robbie’s taunts for the rest of the afternoon. More than a few times, he had to restrain himself. The urge to punch his brother’s disgusting, suggesting mouth was strong. Luckily, his father sensed the tension when he returned and ordered Peeta to work the storefront.

 

* * *

 

“Maybe I should pay the Denworth’s a visit.” His mother said unexpectedly while they were eating dinner that night. Peeta froze in his seat, his fork halfway to his mouth, eyes wide in fear. Robbie kicked him under the table and his brain seemed to come back to itself as he lifted the food to his mouth and chewed his now tasteless food.

“The Denworth’s?” Peeta’s father asked. “Whatever for?”

Mrs. Mellark gave her husband a haughty look and nodded her head towards their youngest son. “Peeta has been seeing their daughter, Leena. I just thought it would be nice to get reacquainted with them.”

“Oh?” Paul Mellark inquired, raising a disbelieving eyebrow at Peeta.

Peeta swallowed his food, but it did little to ease the lump rising in his throat. “Ah! Yes… Dad. I’ve been spending time with Leena after school on Tuesdays and Thursdays…” He gave his father a meaningful look, hoping he knew what it meant.

“Well,” his father said. “How nice.”

“As I was saying before I was so  _ rudely _ interrupted,” Sudie growled. “I think I’ll pay them a visit this weekend. It’ll be nice to see old friends again. And then we can discuss Peeta’s intentions with Leena and get them properly established in the community.”

“No!” Peeta shouted suddenly. He couldn’t let his mother find out he was lying. But he knew she disapproved of young couples running around in the shadows without “proper” claims to each other. If the relationship was real, he knew she would make them visit under supervision and establish boundaries with the other parents involved. He searched for an answer. “No, Mom. Please,” He started, lowering his voice. “Leena… She doesn’t want anyone to know about us.”

His mother was glaring at him again and he knew if he said one wrong word, he would regret it for the rest of his life. He shot a pleading look to his father, hoping he didn’t go too far for him to help him out of this jam. He relaxed marginally when he saw his turn and address his wife.

“Now, Sudie. There’s no use scaring them off. Why not let the boy have some fun for now?” He asked. His wife turned her icy stare on him and he cleared his throat. “What if Peeta promises to come home straight after school? If Peeta is still interested in becoming attached to the girl after the Hunger Games, we’ll talk about it then.”

Peeta sighed and looked into his plate. He was thankful for his father for coming up with a solution to continue hiding the truth from his mother. But it also effectively cut off his chances for pursuing Katniss outside of school. He also thanked his father for buying him time. The Hunger Games were still a few months away, but only a fool (or a couple who were truly in love) would pursue a relationship before the Games. The chance of being ripped apart was too great.

“You come straight home after school!” His mother snapped at him, bringing his attention to the present. “If you want to spend time with her outside of school, you’ll bring her here to the bakery, where I can keep an eye on you, you hear?”

“Yes, Mother.” Peeta replied.

 

* * *

 

Peeta didn’t have much time to think about his fabricated story. The midterm exams came on suddenly and he used all his attention and focus on passing them. By the end of the day on Thursday, he’d completely forgot about Leena Denworth and their supposed “romance.”

His mother hadn’t, though.

When he opened the door to the bakery, he instantly heard it. Yelling. A slightly feminine voice and a calmer masculine voice replying. He heard the crash and turned to leave, fearing the sight he almost walked in on. He was halfway out the door when he was caught by her voice.

“Peeta!” His mother yelled angrily at his back. “You get in this house this instant!”

Eyes wide, Peeta turned and slowly made his way into the kitchens. His mother stood beside a broken bowl, hands on her wide hips. His father was sitting at the worktable, his expression unreadable. Panic rose inside him. He searched frantically around the back of the bakery. There was a slim possibility that Robbie was the one in trouble and she just needed some information out of him. No such luck. He spotted Robbie’s head peeking through the cellar door, hiding from their mother’s wrath.

“Would you like to know what I did today, Peeta?” His mother asked him in a cruel, mocking voice. Peeta froze. Any movement could have adverse effects on the outcome.

“I was walking around the square, doing my usual duties when I happened to run into none other than Mrs. Denworth.” She paused, taking a step towards her son. “Imagine my surprise when I asked her how Leena was doing and she said Leena had found a nice young man. Apparently she and this fine young gentleman- who is not you- have been promised to each other for a year.”

“Mom!” Peeta begged, not knowing what to say, just knowing she would take her anger out on him physically.

“Do you remember what I told you if I found out you were lying?” She asked, taking another step forward.

Peeta swallowed, remembering perfectly well what she had said. He fought the urge to cower away from her. He knew he was stronger. Would anyone really blame him if he stood up against her?  _ No, _ he thought,  _ but I would _ . Peeta hated the idea of hurting his mother, even if she was a monster. She had raised him and there were a few fond memories they shared from when he was younger. He compromised. He didn’t shrink back, but he didn’t strike back as his mother’s hand snaked up to grab his hair.

“Where were you?” She punctuated each word, yanking his head back forcefully.

Peeta remained silent. The last thing he wanted was to give up Katniss to his mother’s fury. He knew it would mean more violence from his mother if he refused to tell her, but he would do anything to protect her, even if he was sure she could protect herself.

“I’m not going to ask you again, Peeta.” His mother warned, releasing her grip on his head. “Where have you been sneaking off to?”

Peeta met her eyes defiantely. Mrs. Mellark’s snarl awakening the fear in him. He pushed it aside and faced her head on, bracing for his punishment. He saw movement out of the corner of his eyes, a tan cylinder, a second before the pain came. The rolling pin struck him in the back of the head. He swallowed his grunt of pain. It came down again in the same spot and Peeta’s vision was blinded by dark spots. He couldn’t restrain his voice this time. He groaned and slouched forward.

The third blow never came. Although he saw her hand reach back again, the rolling pin didn’t strike him. He was vaguely aware of the sound of a fleshy smack and his father’s voice.

“Enough, Sudie. The boy hasn’t done anything wrong!” He commanded.

“He lied to me Paul!” She argued. “And he’s been skipping his shifts!”

“He traded with Robbie, you know that. The Everdeen girl has been tutoring him for school, but now that his grades are up, he won’t need to go anymore. Stop this before I do.”

_ Oh no… _ Peeta thought.  _ Now she knows about Katniss... _

Peeta raised his eyes from the floor to his parents. His father stood between him and his mother, the rolling pin clutched in his broad hands. Mr. Mellark had never interfered with punishment before, at least not physically. He’d only chastise his wife for beating the boys. If Peeta was hearing correctly, which he wasn’t sure he was due to the pain radiating from the back of his head, it sounded like his father was threatening her.

“You wouldn’t.” Mrs. Mellark challenged.

“I’ll call for the Peacekeepers right now.” He asserted.

Mr. and Mrs. Mellark stood staring at each other for a long time before Peeta felt his strength give out and he slumped to his knees. His father was at his side, throwing Peeta’s arm over his shoulders and dragging him to stand.

“I’m taking him to bed.” He told his wife. Then his voice grew soft and pleading. “Please, Sudie. I beg you to think about what you've done.”

“If you think-”

“Sudie! Enough.” Peeta heard his father sigh above him. “Beat him anymore and maybe you won’t have a son anymore.”

He didn’t wait for her reply, if there was going to be one. Mr. Mellark dragged Peeta up the stairs and into his room that was now his own since Clyde had moved out. Peeta moved to lay down, but his father stopped him. He didn’t say a word as he inspected the damage. After a minute of poking and prodding, wincing every time Peeta hissed in pain, he declared sleep to be his best option and left him alone. Grateful for the privacy, Peeta sank into his mattress and instantly fell asleep.

The morning brought pain, but at least his vision was clear again. He waved off his father’s protests that he should stay home from school and tried to ignore his mother’s threats to stay away from “that Seam trash” Katniss. Today, they got their exam grades back and if he passed, he would likely be home soon anyway. Besides, he needed to see her. Something about pain made him want to be closer to Katniss. Or maybe he just associated his beatings with her. The black eye he’d received after burning the bread for her, his swollen knuckles for thinking about her instead of doing his job, and now a splitting headache for protecting their friendship. He smiled sardonically to himself. Katniss sure did cause him a lot of pain.  _ It’s worth it though, _ he said to himself as her envisioned her smile.

He was right. His time with Katniss by the meadow improved his mood significantly. Even though she had rebuffed his advances. At least now he knew where he stood. He just needed to back off for awhile.

 

* * *

 

 

It was May. The bright heat of the sun kissed Peeta’s face as he stood outside the school. In the past few weeks, it had become routine to wait outside the school and chat with Prim before they went home. Katniss was always there, and she seemed uncomfortable. Even when Prim tried to include her in their conversations. It was no different today, but Katniss had arrived at their pre-determined meeting place ahead of Prim.

“Hey, Katniss!” Peeta greeted as he approached, being mindful to keep some distance between them. Ever since the day in the meadow, she seemed to be uneasy when he stood too close. It pained him to restrain himself, but scaring Katniss was the last thing he wanted to do.

“Hi, Peeta.” She said in return, keeping her eyes on the flow of students around them.

Maybe now was a good time to address the awkwardness between them? Peeta hated to see their friendship fade after feeling so close to her before midterms. “Are you okay?” He asked without thinking.

She turned her attention to him and drew her eyebrows together in confusion. “Yeah, I’m fine. Why?”

“I don’t know…” Peeta began, shoving his hand into his pocket to quell his urge to touch her. “I just feel like things have been… different between us lately.”

Her eyes narrowed and she looked back to the crowd of bodies, searching for Prim. “It’s not  _ my _ fault.” She stated quietly.

Now it was his turn to be confused. “What? Are you saying it’s my fault?”

Katniss glanced sideways at him. Their eyes met briefly before she looked away again, her mouth set in a grim line. She wasn’t denying it. Peeta scratched his head, perplexed. The past few months he had gone out of his way to make excuses to talk to her during school. She had been the one to pull away. After the day at the meadow…  _ Oh no.  _ He thought.

“Is this…” He said, inching closer to her and lowering his voice to a whisper. “Is this about what happened at the meadow? Katniss, I’m sorry about that. I just-”

“I don’t want to get married.” She stated unexpectedly, looking down at the ground.

Stunned, Peeta’s mind raced with unbidden images of Katniss sitting beside him in front of a fire. A piece of bread in their joined, outstretched hands. He closed his eyes, hoping the images would go away. When they didn’t, he pinched the bridge of his nose, hoping the pain would bring him back to reality. He opened his eyes to stare at her, a gaping hole ripped in his chest. Suddenly his future seemed bleak and grim. Katniss doesn’t want to get married. Ever or right now? He was too afraid of the answer to ask, so he searched for something to say.

“Um.” He said, subconsciously reaching his hand towards her to steady himself and his conflicting emotions. He drew his hand back before it reached her, any sort of physical touch would surely send her running. “We’re just friends, Katniss. No one said anything about marriage.” It was true. Despite his fantasies and wishes for them, he had never mentioned his feelings for her.

He saw her release a breath and slowly turn her head to him. “I’m sorry. I just- at the meadow- I panicked. I’ve never wanted that.”

Peeta’s heart was pounding in his chest. It wasn’t his worst fear- that was her dying- but it was definitely close to the top of the list of his biggest fears. Rejection. They could still be friends right? He could possibly live with being her friend. “Katniss-”

“Peeta!” He heard Prim yell from a distance. “Katniss!”

Peeta immediately stepped away from Katniss and plastered his best smile on as he turned to greet Prim. She hugged him tightly. Now she would tell him about her day and he would listen patiently until she finished and they all said goodbye and went to their prospective homes. He was wholly prepared to listen to whatever Prim had to tell him, but she turned to Katniss instead.

“Katniss,” Prim addressed her, holding out a small package to her. “I’m so sorry I didn’t give this to you this morning, but it wasn’t finished. Happy birthday! Again!”

“Thanks, Prim,” Katniss said as she laid a hand on her sister’s cheek lovingly. “I’ll open it when we get home.”

Prim tilted her head to the side and gazed at her expectedly. “Don’t you want to show Peeta?”

His name brought Peeta out of his shock. Today was Katniss’ birthday? How had he not known? “Today’s your birthday?” Peeta blurted.

“Yes.” Katniss said, avoiding her eyes.

“I didn’t get you anything!”

“It’s okay. I don’t need anything.”

“No, it’s not okay, Katniss.” Peeta said firmly. “You’re my friend and I want to get you something.” He furrowed his brows in concentration, thinking of anything he could get her. A cake would be a good start, but he needed to give her something she couldn’t eat. Something she could keep forever.

“Peeta-”

“No. I’m going to get you something, okay. Come by the bakery tonight? Around seven?” He pleaded.

“Yes, of course!” Prim cried, grinning from ear to ear.

“Prim!” Katniss admonished. She threw a glare in his direction. “Peeta-”

“See you at seven!” Peeta exclaimed before racing away so she couldn’t refuse. Even if she didn’t want to come, she would if Prim asked her to. Her smile had that effect on people. And suddenly, Peeta had the perfect idea for her present.

He ran all the way home, sending a prayer to whoever was listening that his mother wasn’t home or at least not in the bakery. He banged the door open and dropped his school things by the door before wrenching an apron off the hook and heading toward the pantry. He scanned the ingredients, picking out the ones used in every cake recipe. She deserved way better than plain yellow cake. She likes chocolate candy, but she hadn’t fawned over the chocolate muffins he’d brought her that one time.

“Whatcha doin, Son?” His father asked, amusedly from his seat by the oven.

Peeta turned and set the ingredients on the worktable then searched the bakery for sign of his mother. “Where’s Mom?” He asked, ignoring his father’s question.

“At the Cartwright's.” He said sadly. “She might not come home tonight. She was pretty upset about that comment I made last night at dinner.” Right. The one about his right to divorce her for violence.

“Good.” Peeta said, scanning the bakery for inspiration.

“Are you going to tell me what you’re doing?” His father asked tiredly.

Peeta turned his full attention to his father, ready to explain his dilemma, but he caught a whiff of butter and cheese and he looked past his father and in the ovens where he saw a couple dozen neat little balls. “Are those cheese buns?” Katniss’ favorite. She never said it, but he knew she was lying about cinnamon bread being her favorite. So, he had brought one of every kind of pastry they made at the bakery over the course of a month. Every time he would ask which was her favorite, and every time she would stubbornly answer “cinnamon bread, of course.” But when he’d brought cheese buns the first time, her eyes glazed over and she gazed longingly at the extras the rest of the day.

His father sighed, nodding his head. Peeta crossed the room to him. “Can you save a couple? For Katniss? It’s her birthday today and I didn’t get her anything.”

Mr. Mellark eyed his son, smirking. “Ah, I see. And I bet you plan to make her a cake as well?”

Peeta nodded. “I don’t know what kind. Yellow cake is too plain, she doesn’t like chocolate pastries, and I don’t know!” He threw his hands up in despair.

“If it’s special you want, there’s only one cake you can make her.” His father said, walking towards the bookshelf that held their recipes and pulling a thin book from the shelf. He brought it to the work table and motioned Peeta over, pointing to the old, tattered page the read  _ Italian Cream Cake  _ in old, neat handwriting.

“What? Dad! I can’t! Those ingredients are too expensive!” He protested, scanning the list: buttermilk, pecans, coconut, cream cheese. It was an old family recipe that dated back to before the Dark Days. His great-grandfather had written down from memory when he opened the bakery. It was only used for family birthdays. Although, it had been years since his mother let them celebrate so extravagantly. 

“Nonsense. I can tell how much you like that girl.” He said, winking. “ _ This _ ,” he gestured to the recipe, “is how you win a woman’s heart!”

Peeta smiled and gave his dad a hug. “Thanks, Dad.” He quickly found and gathered the remaining ingredients, mixed a half recipe and poured it into a round cake pan. 

“Are you getting her anything else?” His father asked as he removed the cheese buns from the large brick oven. He set them to cool and took the cake pan from his son’s grasp.

“Shit!” Peeta cursed. Her present! He ran towards the cellar door, pulled it open and flew down the steps. With the light from the kitchen, he navigated around the boxes of supplies and old files. He found an old box that contained ancient receipts and orders, sorting through the ones he’d already doodled on. He pulled out a yellowed sheet of paper and surveyed it for damage. Besides the discoloring, it was in perfect condition. He returned to the kitchen and placed the paper on a clean part of the worktable, ignoring his father’s curious looks.

“Son?” He asked, but Peeta ignored him and disappeared into the storefront. He came back a second later, holding the pencil they used to take down orders. Mr. Mellark could only stare thoughtfully at the boy as he began sketching on the paper.


	6. Confusion

Katniss fumed at the kitchen table as she watched her mother help Prim finish her homework. She and Prim had come straight home after school, with Prim going on and on about how  _ sweet _ Peeta was to think of her on her birthday. But he hadn’t, really. He hadn’t even known it was her birthday until Prim gave her that present- which still sat unopened in front of her. Her sour mood only worsened when they had arrived home and Katniss realized she had forgotten to go the the Justice Building to sign up for Tesserae. She’ll have to stop tomorrow after school.

“Are you going to open your present, Katniss?” Prim asked sweetly from across the table. Her homework was apparently finished. Her mother sat down at the head of the table and looked to Katniss expectantly.

Katniss sighed and reached for the package in front of her. What could it possibly be? She shot an appreciative smile at prim before untying the string and unwrapping the gift. Inside the plain brown paper was gray wool, shaped and fitted into a long scarf. It was thick and warm and perfect.

“I know it’s almost summer and you won’t need it,” Prim explained, giving her a hopeful look. “But I thought it could keep you warm when you go hunting this winter.”

Ignoring the heat, Katniss wrapped the scratchy fabric around her neck. “I love it, Prim. I’m sure it will keep me plenty warm this winter.”

Prim beamed at her. Her mouth stretched wide on her face and her mouth slightly open. Katniss loved Prim’s smile. She supposed everyone did. It was wide and genuine and it touched her eyes and made them shine bright.

“Here, Katniss,” her mother spoke up from her side, pushing a bulging envelope towards her. “Happy birthday.” Katniss felt uneasy under her mother’s warm smile. It was true that in the past two years or so her mother had begun to help more around the house. She had even started taking patients again and was contributing to their income. But some part of Katniss would always resent her mother for leaving her and Prim to fend for themselves for so long.

Katniss lifted the fat envelope and pulled the flap free, dumping the contents out. A small, round tin deposited in her hand and she looked at it curiously. She lifted the lid and was hit with the strong scent of lemongrass and honey. She examined the balm inside, pale yellow and thick.

“What is it?” Katniss asked as she lifted the tin to her nose and inhaled the soothing scent and noting the way her airways seemed to open further.

“It’s a balm to help keep your skin from drying out.” Her mother said. “It will also help with sinuses. I know how the pollen bothers you sometimes.”

Katniss felt her heart constrict. It was thoughtful of her. Katniss pushed the feeling away and offered a small thanks as she replaced the lid and set the tin on the table.

“I wonder what Peeta got you!” Prim said unexpectedly from her seat. Katniss felt her face grow warm and took off the scarf, telling herself that was the only reason she was flushed.

“It doesn’t matter,” Katniss muttered. “I’m not going over there.”

“Why not, Katniss?” Prim asked, shocked. “What if he made you a cake? Are you just going to let it go to waste?”

“What’s this, now?” Her mother inquired in concern.

“Peeta told Katniss to go to the bakery tonight at seven so he could give her a birthday present.” Prim explained.

Katniss rolled her eyes and pushed herself up from the table to begin making dinner. “And I’m not going because it’s stupid!” She cried indignantly.

“That’s not very polite, Katniss.” Her mother chastised. “That poor boy probably spent a lot of time and energy on it. It would be rude not to accept.”

Katniss gave a strangled choke of disbelief. “He didn’t even know it was my birthday until Prim told him after school!”

Prim hopped up from her seat and came to stand in front of Katniss. “Didn’t you see his face when he found out? He was so upset! He really likes you, Katniss.”

She ignored her mother’s questioning glance and turned to the counter to hide her burning face. It wasn’t true. It wasn’t! Just earlier, he had said they were just friends. Which obviously meant he didn’t think about her like that and she had just made a fool of herself for assuming he did.

“No he doesn’t…” She whispered, fighting back the sadness that wedged its way into her heart at the thought.

“Katniss,” her mother said gently. “Is there something you want to talk about?”

“Not with you!” Katniss blurted before covering her mouth with her hand, her eyes going wide in shock. Why did she say that?

Her mother’s pained expression hurt Katniss more than she would ever admit. But she didn’t push the subject and continued with making their dinner. The small kitchen was silent as the three Everdeen’s cooked their dinner of rabbit meat, wild greens, and a small portion of their nearly depleted tesserae grains made into bread.

As they ate, Prim picked up a conversation with their mother about some end or the year project she was doing in school. Katniss glanced at the clock between bites, the ever ticking hands mocking her. It was just after five o’clock now, if she hurried to eat and maybe cleaned herself up a bit, she could make it to the Merchant square in time to visit the Justice Building before seeing Peeta.  _ What? _ She thought incredulously.  _ No! I don’t want to see Peeta!  _

Well, she did, but not like  _ that _ . Right? Prim’s earlier words came back to her and she hated herself for hoping they were true. She could not and would not think about Peeta that way. She couldn’t afford to entertain any idea of them together. It didn’t fit her plan. How could she look after Prim if she went and got married to some merchant? What happened if one of them were reaped? Love was dangerous and cruel. She had seen what it had done to her mother. Images of her mother lying in bed, unable to do anything- even speak. She wouldn’t do that to herself.

But… A small, insesent part of her told her it wouldn’t be like that. How many times had her mother told her she had been sick? That it was more than just sadness. Maybe she could entertain the idea of being with Peeta. Maybe she could take the risk. No. Prim needed her. She couldn’t abandon her, even if a small part of her heart wanted her to.

“Katniss?” Her mother called. “Are you alright?” Katniss snapped back to herself and felt the cool press of her mother’s fingers on her hand.

Katniss sighed tiredly and pulled her hand from underneath her mother’s. Maybe talking to her mother would help sort out this confusion, but she had never opened up to her mother like this. Not since her father died. She decided to test the waters.

“It’s Peeta.” She whispered, pushing her wild salad around with her fork and avoiding the gazes of both her mother and Prim. “I don’t know what to do.”

Prim was surprisingly quiet, only watching them with large, innocent eyes. Her mother pushed her plate away from her and turned to face Katniss directly. “About what? Seeing him tonight?”

Katniss laughed sardonically. “About him!” She exclaimed. She paused as she thought about how she could stop the conversation right then and nobody would ever know about the storm raging inside her. She looked up to her mother finding comfort from them that she hadn’t seen in years. “I don’t want to like him.”

“Why not?” Mrs. Everdeen asked, drawing her eyebrows together in confusion.

“It’s not worth it.” Katniss whispered, looking away and drawing a breath to explain. “I saw what you were like after Dad… If something happened- I don’t want to hurt like that.”

Her mother didn’t speak for a long time and Katniss stole a glance and saw the tears in her eyes. She looked to Prim and saw the sadness on her face as well. “Katniss…” Prim whispered. “I don’t think that’s a good enough reason to not like him. Peeta is  _ so _ nice and he cares about you a lot. Isn’t that worth it?”

“No.” Katniss said firmly. “Nothing is worth losing yourself for. I can’t take care of you if I can’t even get out of bed!”

Her mother flinched at her words. “Then don’t.” Her mother said softly but surely. “If you’re not ready to give your heart completely, then you shouldn’t. If you don’t want to be involved with Peeta, don’t be. But don’t drag him along while you make up your mind. If he cares about you like Prim said, you’ll only hurt him.”

Katniss was shocked. She couldn’t remember the last time her mother spoke to her like that, if at all. They sat in silence while Katniss finished her food and helped her mother and sister clear the table. She glanced at the clock again, five thirty-seven. Maybe…

“I was going to suggest we eat this for dessert,” Mrs. Everdeen proposed, holding a bowl filled with various fruits. “But if you’re going to see Peeta, I think you’ll need to save room.” She finished with an uncharacteristic wink.

Katniss frowned. Maybe she should go just to avoid her family. “Fine, I’m going.” She marched off to the bedroom she shared with Prim and her mother, opening her mother’s drawer on the dresser. She didn’t really have any nice clothes, except for her Reaping outfit, and she definitely didn’t want to wear that. She rummaged around, pushing clothes aside until her fingers brushed soft fabric at the back. She pulled out the faded blue sweater. It was thin, too thin to even protect against the gentlest of breezes. Perfect for the warm weather. She fastened the sweater’s buttons over a plain black shirt that might have been Prim’s by the way it hugged her. Her fingers ran out of buttons at her breasts and she frowned. She walked back to the kitchen.

“Mom, there’s something wrong with this sweater, it’s missing buttons.” She complained.

Her mother turned and inspected the offending clothing, chuckling softly. “No, dear. It’s made like that. It’s a cardigan. It helps show off a woman’s curves.”

Katniss blanched. She didn’t want to show off her “womanly curves” to anyone. She was pretty sure she didn’t even have any. Her mother must have seen the panic in her face, because she came over and laid a hand on her shoulder.

“It’s okay, Katniss, it looks nice on you. Why don’t you brush your hair out before you go?”

She rolled her eyes at her mother’s request. “No thanks, it’s fine the way it is. Besides, I need to get to the Justice Building before it closes.”

Her mother let her leave, and Prim said goodbye and asked if she would bring her home some of whatever Peeta had made her. She kissed Prim on the top of her head and said her goodbyes, heading into the fading light towards the bakery.

 

* * *

 

The doorbell rang overhead as she entered the Mellark’s bakery. No one was attending the counter and all of the display cases were empty. She stood awkwardly by the door, unsure of what to do. She thought about going around to the back like she did when she brought game for Mr. Mellark, but Peeta had invited her so she’d decided to use the front door. Katniss hugged her arms to her body, self-conscious of her body and the way the blue sweater outlined her feminine form. She had just ran into Darius at the Justice Building where he gave her the once-over and smirked mischievously. She didn’t think she’d ever stop blushing.

“Hey, Katniss.” She heard Mr. Mellark say from the back of the storefront. “Come on back, I’m just about to finish closing up.”

“Okay,” Katniss said nervously, making her way to the back.

“Wait, Dad! I’m not done yet, don’t let her in here!” She heard Peeta yell from somewhere ahead of her. Mr. Mellark stopped in the doorway and turned to give her an apologetic look before pointing back the way they came. Mr. Mellark gestured to one of the chairs by the window and set to work cleaning the cases and counters with a rag.

About ten minutes later, Peeta appeared in the doorway. His face was slightly red and he had icing smudged onto his cheek. When he met her eyes, he smiled. “Hey! Happy birthday!” He greeted, walking towards her.

“Uh, thanks.” She said, standing from the chair, tugging the sleeves of the sweater over her hands.

He smirked, full of something Katniss couldn’t quite place. “You look nice.”

“Oh, well, it’s my birthday, so…” She returned his smile. He gave her a laugh and turned towards the back rooms again, motioning her to follow him.

“Peeta,” his father said before they left the storefront. “I’m about done closing up, then I’m going upstairs. When Katniss is ready to go home, be a gentleman and walk her home, okay? And behave yourself.”

“Dad!” Peeta exclaimed, turning scarlet. It was Katniss’ turn to laugh out loud. Peeta gave her a wary glance before giving her a smile as well. He said goodnight to his father and led Katniss into the kitchen.

He walked over to a long wooden table. On it was a cake, covered in white frosting, brown flakes and some type of nut. A plate of cheese buns and a small square wrapped in paper sat beside it.

Peeta gestured to the festive display, “Ta-da!” He said cheerfully. “Happy birthday, Katniss!”

She followed Peeta’s lead and sat at the table across from him. “Wow, Peeta…” She mumbled as she studied the cake. Up close she could see the brown flakes were coconut. And she only knew that because Peeta had brought her a coconut doughnut once. She had never seen nuts like the ones that were arranged so perfectly in a circle on the cake’s top. She was sure she had never seen a cake like it in the bakery window. She looked up to see him looking at her. “What kind of cake is this?”

Peeta turned the side, pulling two plates and a knife towards him. “It’s called Italian Cream Cake. It’s an old family recipe. Older than the Dark Days.”

Katniss narrowed her eyes skeptically. “No way.” They didn’t have anything  _ from  _ the Dark Days, let alone  _ before _ …

Peeta smiled, “It’s true! My great-great-grandfather passed it on to his son and he wrote it down from memory before he died.”

“I don’t believe you.” Katniss challenged, raising an eyebrow.

Peeta took the knife and cut a wide piece out, setting it on one of the worn, wooden plates and sliding towards Katniss. “Then how do you explain the name?” He argued, cutting a slice for himself.

“Well, ‘cake’ is obvious. And so is ‘cream.’” She said thoughtfully. “What was the other word?”

“Italian.”

“Hmm.” She frowned. She’d never heard that word before. “I don’t know. Maybe your great-grandfather made it up.”

Peeta laughed and handed her a spoon. “Why would he do that?”

“So he could claim the recipe was from before the Dark Days, of course!” She smirked at him, tucking her utensil into the cake. She frowned again, pulling the spoon from her cake and holding it in front of her. “A spoon?”

“What?” He asked innocently before giving her a smug smile. “Don’t tell me you’re one of those weird people who eat cakes with forks.”

“ _ Normal _ people, like me, do eat cakes with forks.” She retorted.

He laughed loudly and Katniss found herself joining in. “It’s better with a spoon, trust me.”

She gave him a skeptical stare, leaving her eyes on his as she dug her spoon into the cake again and brought it to her lips. She caught a glimpse of his smug expression before her eyes closed in pleasure. The cake was so moist and tasted better than  _ anything  _ she’d ever had before.

“Told you.” She heard him say. She ignored him and devoured her slice. He followed suit and took her plate to the sink when they finished.

“Are those cheese buns?” She asked.

“Yeah,” He said, leaning his upper body on the table towards her. “It’s part of your present. Take them home with you.”

“Oh, okay.” Her present? Wasn’t the cake her present? As if sensing her thoughts, Peeta reached for the paper-wrapped square and held it out to her. She took it gingerly and laid it on the table before her. Another present?

“Open it.” He said. His eyes searched hers nervously. What does he have to be nervous about?

She sighed and untied the string, pulling the paper from the square. It was a frame. Her mother had a couple at home. Made of wood and holding old pictures of people she’s never met. It appeared to be the back of a frame, the little stand pushed flush against the backing. She glanced at Peeta. A picture? Of what? Did he have a camera? He motioned for her to look at and she flipped it over.

Katniss’ breath caught in her throat as she stared at the image in her hands. It was Prim. A gray sketch of her face up close. Every detail was perfect. He wide, open smile. The way her cheeks pulled upward. Even in black and white, Peeta had somehow captured the way her eyes lit up. They practically shined.

“Did you draw this?” She whispered. She knew the answer. She recalled the tiny sketches he doodled in the margins of the paper when they finished their homework.

Peeta nodded anyway. “I can color it, if you want. I just have to see if I can locate some colored pencils or paints.”

“No.” Katniss said, fighting tears in her eyes. “It’s perfect. You captured her… perfectly.” She screwed her eyes shut and place the picture on the table. She would not cry in front of him. But what he’d done was so thoughtful. He somehow knew what was most precious to her in the world and gave her a way to cherish it forever.

“Katniss?” She heard him ask beside her, suddenly aware of him. She hadn’t heard him walk around the table towards her, but she could feel the heat of him radiating beside her. He placed a warm hand on her back. “Katniss, are you okay? I didn't-”

She opened her eyes and turned towards his voice, “I’m fine.” She said unevenly. “It’s just… No one has ever done something so nice for me.” His face was close to hers and she felt hot under his gaze. An overwhelming urge to kiss him washed over her and she jerked back when she realized she was beginning to lean forward.

“Sorry.” Peeta mumbled, taking a step back. He searched her eyes, her eyes that were still full of tears. “You really like it?”

Like that, the spell was broken and she half-laughed, half-sobbed as she rolled her eyes to the ceiling. “Of course I like it, Peeta. More than that. I  _ love _ it. Thank you.” Impulsively, she flung her arms out to him and wrapped him in a hug. It was the most contact they’d ever had. And even though Katniss was turned to the side, the feel of his body pressed against hers was comforting.

“No problem. It’s what friends are for.” He said almost sadly.  _ Right _ . Katniss thought.  _ We’re just friends. _

She pulled away and looked into her lap where her fingers twisted together uncertainly. “I should go home.” She said.

Peeta nodded silently and disappeared into the storefront. He came back holding a couple pastry boxes and quickly folded them into shape. He lifted the cake and nestled it carefully into the large box, closing it and fastening the lid with string. The smaller box he loaded with the cheese buns and similarly tied it up. Katniss grabbed her picture, now her most valuable possession, and stood up to follow him to the door. Peeta stopped in his tracks halfway there and Katniss nearly ran into his back.

“Peeta, what-”

Peeta glanced back at her and she saw the raw panic in his eyes. Then she heard it, the unmistakeable sound of a door shutting and footsteps coming towards them. She was slightly impressed with the way Peeta smoothed his features into a blank expression and turned back around.

Katniss poked her head around his broad shoulders and saw his mother standing before them. She had likewise froze in her steps upon seeing them and was now alternately pinning Katniss and Peeta with glares.

“Peeta.” She said flatly, schooling her face back into something resembling calm. Peeta didn’t answer, but shifted his stance so that he stood more in front of Katniss. Mrs. Mellark turned her attention to Katniss and raised an eyebrow. “You must be Katniss. I’ve heard so much about you.” She deadpanned.

She saw Peeta’s muscles tense and his jaw clench before he spoke. “Mother… Please.”

His mother eyed him for a considerable moment before stepping aside. “Leave. Now. I better not see her face around here again, or else.”

Peeta quickly grabbed Katniss’ arm and began to lead her out the door, clearly intent on getting them out of there as quickly as possible. Was Peeta going to get in trouble for this? For being nice to her? Memories of his black eye from years ago and the bruise on his head just months ago flashed through her mind. She dug her heels into the floor and pulled her arm from Peeta’s grasp. She had to stand up for him.

“No, wait-”

“Katniss.” Peeta’s voice was calm, but she could hear the warning underneath.

“No, Peeta, give me a minute.” She turned and strode to where Mrs. Mellark was standing by the stairs. She squared her shoulders and put as much confidence into her voice as she could muster. “Mrs. Mellark?” She turned and raised an eyebrow at her.

“You can’t treat him like that.” Katniss said before she knew what she was saying, voice wavering slightly. “Peeta is the kindest person I’ve ever met. He wouldn’t hurt a fly. And he’s so talented. People love his cakes. You can’t mistreat him the way you do. You have no right!”

“He’s _my_ _son_ , I have every right!” She shot back angrily.

“In all the years you’ve beaten him, has he ever laid a hand on you? No! And he doesn’t even have a bad word to say about you! He defends you! What kind of monster-”

“Enough! I won’t be spoken to like this!” Mrs. Mellark turned to her son and pinned him with a glare.

Katniss felt Peeta’s hand on her shoulder. “Come on, Katniss, let’s just go.”

“No!” She yelled, pulling her shoulder from his hold. “Not until she promises to treat you better! You don’t deserve this!”

“What’s going on?” Peeta’s father said from the top of the stairs. He descended swiftly, eyeing all three of them warily before turning his attention to his wife. “Sudie? I thought you were staying-”   


“I changed my mind.” Mrs. Mellark said brusquely, looking down.

“Mr. Mellark, please,” Katniss addressed him. He had always been a kind man, surely he would help her. “I just want to make sure she won’t hurt Peeta again.”

“Katniss, this isn’t your problem-” Peeta said softly.

“I’m not leaving until she promises.” Katniss asserted.

“Katniss,” Mr. Mellark said. “Really, there’s no need.”

“No. I don’t care if you have to call the Peacekeepers to drag me out, I just need to know she won’t hurt him again.”

“I promise.” Mrs. Mellark whispered. Three heads snapped in her direction. She was looking at the floor, shoulders slumped. “At least I’ll try.” She brought her eyes up to meet Katniss’. “Is that enough?”

Katniss stared at the woman for a long time. Where a cold-hearted shrewd she had always imagined her to be was gone. In her place stood a tired looking woman with red-rimmed eyes and a defeated posture. Had she looked like this when she came in minutes ago? Katniss wasn’t sure if she could trust this woman, but at least she was yelling or cursing or swing her club-like arms at them. Katniss reluctantly nodded.

“Then go.” Mrs. Mellark said wearily. Peeta immediately pulled Katniss from the room and she let him. When they were outside, Peeta released her arm and walked silently beside her. 

“You didn’t have to do that.” Peeta whispered, it was barely audible over the crickets that were starting to wake for the night.

“Yes I did.” Katniss said. She hugged the precious frame to her chest and impulsively reached out to him. She squeezed his hand in her fingers. He looked down at the joined hands and back to her face. He offered her a sad smile and they continued to walk down the street, hand in hand. 

She said goodbye when they reached her house but he insisted he come inside and put the pastry boxes on the table. She thanked him for the presents and closed the door on his retreating form.

Despite the confrontation, Katniss thought it was one of the best birthdays she’d ever had.


	7. The Reaping: Part 1

Mrs. Mellark’s behavior over the next few weeks was surprising. It wasn't a complete one-eighty turn, more like forty-five degrees. She was still cold and distant, admonishing Peeta when he made mistakes, and she occasionally yelled at him, but she hadn't laid a hand on him. And it was all thanks to Katniss, and maybe his father. Apparently his comment about divorce had some effect on her.

Things with Katniss had changed for the better as well. Although a couple weeks after her birthday, school had ended and they saw each other significantly less. She stopped by every Saturday, bringing a squirrel or two for his father and staying to chat for awhile afterwards. May rolled into June and all too quickly, Peeta found himself on the morning of Reaping Day. At four in the morning, he stood over the sink in the bathroom, peering at his disheveled face. His tired eyes were begging to close, but he shook himself awake and splashed his face with water. Robbie banged on the door and Peeta cursed silently before exiting into the hallway.

“About time.” His brother muttered under his breath as he entered the bathroom and slammed the door behind him.

Most other businesses in town took the day off, but not the bakery. People took advantage of the “holiday” and came to the bakery to buy bread and breakfast pastries for their families. After the Reaping, families would come buy sweets to celebrate that their family had been spared. And every year, a few families would chip in to buy something for the families of the tributes. It was the bakery’s busy day of the year.

All three of the Mellark men set to work in the early hours of the morning. They doubled every batch and by the time six o’clock came, they had a line of patrons waiting outside the door. Peeta was surprised to Gale Hawthorne as one of the first. Peeta unlocked the door and welcomed them in, taking his place behind the counter as his father took over the register. Gale wasn’t in a talkative mood, but Peeta talked to him nonetheless. He left quickly after picking out a loaf of bread. The other customers were more polite as Peeta packaged up their orders efficiently. The first two hours went quickly, with Peeta taking and packing orders, his father ringing them up and Robbie running back and forth from the kitchens to restock the display cases.

His father was the first to take his break at nine, when the line slowed to a manageable pace. They each got an hour to relax and eat before they closed temporarily at noon. They still had to attend the Reaping after all. Ten o’clock finally came and Peeta took some defective pastries with him to the back porch to enjoy the summer morning. He downed his food within the first five minutes before laying out on the sun-warmed planks of the porch. The bright sun felt good on his skin and he felt his fatigue catch up with him. Soon, he fell asleep.

* * *

 

“Peeta?” A voice said above him. Peeta opened his eyes to the the bright sun. After his eyes adjusted, he saw Katniss and Gale standing at the bottom of the steps, glancing at him curiously. Their game bags were bulging and slung over their shoulders.

_ Crap, _ he cursed.  _ How long have I been asleep? _ He sat up and rubbed his eyes before greeting them. He welcomed them onto the porch and told them it would probably be better to wait outside due to the heat of the kitchen ovens. On his way to fetch his father, Peeta glanced at the clock and breathed a sigh of relief. Ten fifteen. He hadn’t been asleep for long. He took over the kitchen for his father, anxiously awaiting his return. Hopefully Katniss would wait for him and they could catch up before his break was over. After what felt like hours, but was only about five minutes, his father returned and Peeta bolted to the back door. She was still there, her back towards him as she spoke low to Gale. She was handing him her hunting bag and gesturing wildly.

“Just go on ahead, what’s the big deal?” Katniss was saying.

“This is your game, you should be the one to barter for it.” Gale argued back, eyes narrowing.

“I trust you to get a fair price, Gale. I just want to talk to Peeta.” His heart soared. She wanted to see him!

“Katniss.” Gale warned. She didn’t reply, just rested one hand on her narrow hip and held her game bag out to him with the other. “Fine.” He grumbled sourly, shooting Peeta a withering glare before stalking off towards the Mayor’s house. 

“What’s up with him?” Peeta asked as he approached.

Katniss shrugged her shoulders and took her spot on the top step with Peeta close behind her. “He’s been acting weird lately…” She finally said.

“I didn’t think you guys would be hunting today.” He said. Which was true, in all the Reaping Days Peeta can remember, Katniss and Gale hadn’t stopped by with a squirrel for even one of them.

Katniss kept her eyes forward and tugged on her socks inside her shoes. “We normally go after bigger game or fish because we have more time, but I thought your dad would appreciate it. I didn’t know the bakery was open on Reaping Day.”

Peeta smiled at her, even though she wasn’t watching him. “Yeah, it’s our busiest day, actually.”

Katniss turned to him, brows furrowed. “Really?”

He nodded. “I guess people like to take advantage of the day off and have other people make their bread for them.”

She frowned. “Yeah… But it seems unfair for you guys.”

Peeta shrugged. “Oh well. We make a lot of money on Reaping Day. Especially in the afternoon.”

“You guys are open after the Reaping, too?”

Peeta gave her a grave smile. “People like to celebrate.”

Katniss was quiet and pulled her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around them and resting her chin atop. Peeta studied her as she basked silently in the sun. Her hair was shining and there was a small smudge of dirt on her cheek beside her ear. She was beautiful. She probably didn’t even realize. Her eyes turned to him and he offered her a small smile. She looked down and sighed tiredly. It was then that her noticed the heavy bags under her eyes.

“You look tired.” He said quietly.

She hesitated, still staring at her shoes. She met his eyes briefly before answering. “I didn’t get much sleep.”

“If you go home now, you might be able to get a couple hours of sleep before the Reaping.” He suggested.

Katniss shook her head and laughed sarcastically. “I couldn’t sleep even if I wanted to.”

“Why not?”

She hesitated again, avoiding his eyes and eventually covering her face with her hands. She stayed like that for a moment and Peeta reached out to touch her shoulder.

“Hey,” He said gently. “If you don’t want to talk about it, that’s okay. But I’m here if you do want to talk.”

She peered at him from behind her hands, somehow looking more tired than she was before. “I get nightmares sometimes.” She confessed so softly, Peeta had to strain to hear. “They can get really bad.”

Peeta waited for her to elaborate, but it was clear that’s all she was going to say on the subject. And was he imagining it, or were her cheeks flushed? “Okay,” He said, brightening his voice slightly. “Let’s talk about something else. Nice weather we’re having, huh?”

Katniss lifted her head up and smiled sadly. “I can’t really focus on the weather today. Maybe tomorrow, when it’s all over.”

Peeta understood, she was worried about the Reaping. She had every right to be. Because of low wages offered in the mine, most children from the Seam needed to take out tesserae, which upped their chances at being Reaped. She had also mentioned weeks ago that it was Prim’s first Reaping. She was probably more worried about Prim than herself. Peeta admired her ability to love.

“It’ll be okay,” He reassured her, placing a hand on her back. “It’s Prim’s first year, her name is only in there once.”

“There’s still a chance. One name out of thousands is still enough of a chance for her to be Reaped.”

Peeta inched closer to her and pulled her into a sideways hug, holding her close. “It’ll be okay. Whatever happens, I’m here for you.”

Katniss buried her head into his shoulder and he was surprised by how  _ normal _ it felt. Before, any physical contact between them had always seemed awkward on either her end or his. But this, this was not. It was comforting, and he loved knowing he could offer her something when she felt this miserable. She angled her head up to look at him. “I can’t stop thinking about it.”

Peeta searched for something to say. “It’s her first year, just hold onto that. My name will be in there five times. What’s my chance of being Reapped?”

“Pretty slim.” She frowned at him.

“And Prim’s chance is even slimmer.” He countered, giving her shoulder a squeeze. He was trying his best to reassure her, but ended up making himself anxious in the process. Katniss was the same age as him, so she automatically had five entries, like him. But he knew she had taken out tesserae because he’d seen her eat bread made out of the tesserae grains. “How many?” He whispered fearfully.

“What?” She asked before recognition dawned on her face and she looked down. “Twenty.”

Peeta’s breath caught in his throat. He figured as much after doing the simple math in his head, but he wanted to make sure. He pulled back from their embrace, his eyes wide in concern. Katniss pulled back as well, returning her knees to her chest and hugging them tightly. “Let’s not think about it.” He said at last.

“I can’t.” She whispered. “All I can think about is someone I care about getting Reaped. I don’t even care about myself, just as long as it isn’t Prim, Gale, Rory, or you.”

_ Me? _ Peeta thought. She cared so much about him, that she was worried about him being Reaped? Of course he felt that way with her. He loved her. For once, he allowed himself to think maybe she felt the same way. Suddenly he thought about being Reapped and not telling her how he felt. The panic rose up so swiftly and violently. “Promise me.” He blurted out forcefully.

She turned to him, confused. “What?”

“Promise me,” He said again, softer. “If I get Reaped, promise me you’ll come say goodbye.”

She was silent awhile, but she finally met his eyes and nodded. “I will. If you promise me the same thing.”

He nodded in return. Of course. If she ended up being Reaped, he would come say goodbye to her. Although, he doubted that it would be the last time he saw her if she were Reaped. Katniss was strong and resourceful. He was sure she would hold her own in the arena if it came down to it.

“Peeta!” His father called from the door. “Break’s up! You’re on the counter!”

Peeta smiled down at Katniss and stood up on his feet before offering his hands to pull her up as well. Peeta embraced her tightly. “It won’t be us. Or anyone we care about. Okay?” The confidence in his voice surprised even him. But he didn’t think life could be so cruel as to pluck her from him before he even had the chance to be with her.

“Okay,” Came her breathy reply by his ear and he squeezed her tighter before letting go and saying goodbye.

* * *

 

The last hour before closing the bakery trudged by. Peeta kept glancing at the clock, counting the minutes until finally, his father gave him the okay to lock the front door and head upstairs to wash up and get ready. He scrubbed down quickly and fashioned his wet hair back. He donned his best clothes and raced downstairs to meet the rest of his family by the door. The walk to the square was short and Peeta fidgeted with the collar of his shirt several times.

“You okay, Peeta?” His father asked as they approached the lines.

Peeta gave his father a wary glance before nodding. Robbie was giving their mother a hug and Peeta couldn’t remember the last time that had happened. After Robbie shook hands with Mr. Mellark, he joined the line. Mrs. Mellark came to stand in front of Peeta and simply nodded before heading for the crowds surrounding the square. Figures.

“Good luck, Son.” His father said before turning to follow his wife.

Peeta went through the line in a haze. He didn’t even feel the prick of the needle as they drew his blood to check his identity. As he was standing in the group of other sixteen year old males, he saw Mark trade places with a couple of guys so they were standing next to each other. He nodded in greeting and Peeta barely said hello before the Capitol anthem blared out of the loudspeakers.

The anthem rang out and afterwards, Effie Trinket came out to relay the same story of the Rebellion and the Dark Days and how the Hunger Games was their rightful punishment. The Mayor said a few words along the same line, but more reproachful. Then, without warning, Effie was back and announcing “ladies first” in that over the top, flashy accent of hers.

Peeta held his breath, chanting “not Katniss, please not Katniss” over and over in his mind. He released a breath when the name drawn was not hers. But something sounded familiar and something about it made Peeta go cold. When he replayed the name in his mind to make sure, he blanched: it was Prim.

He looked wildly about, trying to find her. He spotted her blonde hair, braided in two sections over her shoulders, making her look younger. Her wide eyes were full of shock and panic, but her feet diligently marched forward towards the stage. He saw movement from across the center aisle, a flash of blue as someone stumbled between the groups of sixteen year olds. Katniss. What was she doing? Peeta glanced at her curiously as she shouted Prim’s name over and over again.

“No.” Peeta whispered as Katniss began to run forward, shouting Prim’s name.  _ Don’t do it Katniss _ , he thought. But she did. He felt his heart stop when she shouted the words.

“I volunteer!” She screamed. “I volunteer as tribute.”

“No.” He whispered again and he could feel several eyes on him now as he watched, horrified, as Katniss pushed Prim into Gale’s arms. Gale? Where had he come from? Then Effie Trinket introduced Katniss to the crowd and asked for a round of applause for the first ever volunteer from District 12. Peeta locked his eyes on her form, rigid and tall. He couldn’t see any trace of emotion on her face. She was so strong. He was so fixated on her that he didn’t notice the people around him giving her the three finger salute.

“You okay, Peeta?” Mark asked beside him. Peeta nodded and dropped his gaze to the ground, eyes watering with unshed tears. He vaguely heard a commotion onstage, but didn’t trust himself to look up yet.

“And now for the boys,” Effie was saying, over-emphasizing every move as she walked to the bowl of names and drew one. She walked back to the microphone and opened the slip. “Peeta Mellark!”

Peeta stilled. Was that his name? Did she really call  _ his  _ name? He was frozen, unable to move. Mark elbowed him in the ribs, confirming that it was him. He glanced at the stage, zeroing in on Katniss as he made his way towards the stage on numb feet. The anger and resentment on her face shocked him. She wasn’t looking at him, though. He followed her line of sight and saw her staring down at Robbie with the rest of the seventeen year olds. Was she mad he wasn’t volunteering for him? Probably, but Peeta knew better than to think Robbie would be willing to take his place. He reached the stairs and turned to look at Katniss, relieved to see she was looking back at him. Her face was tight and he could see the beginning of a frown on her lips.

Effie escorted him to the spot next to Katniss and introduced them as District 12’s tributes and urged them to shake hands. Peeta turned to Katniss and took her outstretched hand. A handshake did little to convey his feelings for her and he suddenly felt bold. He tugged on Katniss’ hand and pulled her into a tight hug. Her hands wrapped around him and he buried his head into her hair, whispering apologies to her. He heard her sniffle and they pulled away as the Peacekeepers pulled them into the Justice Building.

“Katniss-” Peeta began, but the Peacekeepers pulled them into separate rooms before he could say anything else.

Peeta was shoved into a posh sitting room with plush seating and high windows. He paced back and forth, waiting for something to happen. At last, the doors opened and his mother, father, Robbie, Clyde and his wife, Winnie, were entering the room. His father swept Peeta up into a hug, the tears already falling on his face. When he pulled back, Clyde stepped forward to clap him on the back and wish him good luck. Winnie did the same, throwing in an apology and a warm hug. Peeta turned to Robbie and saw his uneasiness.

“Peeta, I’m sorry!” Robbie said. Staying back and shoving his hands into his pockets.

“It’s okay, Robbie, I understand.” Peeta told him, slightly confused by the sudden affection from his brother.

“No, it’s not. I should have volunteered, like Katniss.”

“No. I couldn’t lose both of you.” Peeta said earnestly.

“She’s a tough one.” His mother spoke up. “She has a real chance. Maybe we’ll get another Victor after all.”

Her candidness stung. But he knew better than to think his mother would offer him comfort, even if he was facing his death. So he agreed, “Yes, she is.”

Mr. Mellark pulled something from his pocket and handed it to him. Shortbread cookies wrapped in cloth. “A taste of home. I had Robbie run down to the bakery before we came in.” His father said.

Peeta took them carefully and put them in his pocket. “Katniss?”

His father smiled softly, pulling out another cloth and showing its contents to him. Cheese buns. Peeta whispered his thanks and asked to be alone with his father. Everyone filed out of the room, leaving Peeta alone with the man who raised him.

“Dad,” he began, swallowing a lump in his throat.

“It’s okay Peeta,” He assured. “You’re stronger than you think, you have a chance-”

“No, Dad.” Peeta stopped him, looking away and inhaling a breath to reveal his plan. “I’m not coming out. Not if there’s a chance she can win.”

A sad realization crossed over his face. More tears fell from his sad eyes. “Peeta…”

“It’s okay, Dad.” Peeta told him, laying a hand on his shoulder. “Even if by some miracle I could make it out of the arena alive, I can’t live without her.” The simple statement finally weighed on him and his heart broke. Peeta’s eyes filled with tears and overflowed onto his cheeks. “Sometimes I wish I had never talked to her, that we were still strangers. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt as much.”

“I doubt that. You’ve liked her for so long… It still would have hurt. Have you told her?”

Peeta shook his head. “And now I can’t. I can’t burden her with my feelings like this. She needs a clear head if she’s going to win.”

The Peacekeepers banged on the door. “Time’s up.” One of them said. His father gave him one last hug before exiting the room. Peeta slumped down on a chair, putting his head in his hands and trying to calm himself down. He needed to be strong.

He was surprised when the Peacekeepers opened the doors again and told him he had another visitor rather than escorting him to the train. He stood up, wondering who else could possibly want to say goodbye to him. A pale blur came running at him and he opened his arms just in time for Prim to jump into them. Of course. Prim. He hugged her tight and kissed the top of his head. He was certain this would be the last time he saw her. She was crying into his shirt and that’s when he noticed Mrs. Everdeen had also came to visit. She tugged on Prim’s shoulders and told her to let go so Peeta could breathe.

“It’s okay, Prim.” Peeta told her.

She gave a broken sob and shook her head. “No it’s not! It’s either you or Katniss and I can’t stand to lose either of you!”

Peeta looked at her then to Mrs. Everdeen. She was standing off to the side, quietly watching their exchange. Her red rimmed eyes told him that she had been crying too. Prim gave another sob of grief and Peeta sat in his chair so he could look her in the eye.

“Prim, look at me.” He commanded softly. Hesitantly, she raised her eyes to his. “I’m going to make sure Katniss makes it out of the arena, okay. She’s going to win.”

“Peeta, you can’t promise that.” Mrs. Everdeen said, frowning. 

“Maybe not, but I can promise I will do everything in my power to protect her.” Peeta met Mrs. Everdeen’s eyes, narrowing them to convey his sincerity.

“You can’t ask her to kill you if it came down to it. You know she wouldn’t.” She whispered.

“If it comes to it, I’ll kill myself.” Peeta stated and Prim hiccupped a sob and wedged her way into his arms again. “I mean it. Katniss lives. I can’t live without her and I don’t plan on giving it a try.”

Prim’s hold tightened and her mother’s eyes went wide. “You know how the Capitol feels about suicide.” She said softly. He did know. When he was eight, the girl tribute from District 9 made it to the final four, only to kill herself because she couldn’t live with what she’d done to get there. The Capitol shows her as a coward, and their district suffered heavily because of it.

“Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that.” He said just as the Peacekeepers were ordering them out. Peeta hugged Prim again, pressing a kiss to her forehead in goodbye. Her mother held onto her to keep her from falling as the left the room and Peeta could hear Prim’s broken sobs as they went down the corridor.

* * *

 

Peeta waited a long time before he was led to the back of the Justice building and pushed into the back of a car. He stumbled in, catching himself on the seat and glaring back at the Peacekeeper who’d shoved him. The middle aged, tight faced man simply moved to shut the door and Peeta had to scramble inside to keep himself from being caught in the door. He found katniss inside, staring out the window. He took the seat beside her as opposed to the one across from her and touched her knee. She jumped slightly at his touch, but when she saw him, she relaxed.

“Of all the luck.” She murmured, leaning back into the soft seat.

“Right?” Peeta said, chuckling softly.

“Sorry I didn’t come to see you like I promised, but you know…” She teased, smiling softly.

“Yeah, me too. Oh well, I guess you’ll never know what I was going to tell you.”

She sat up and turned to him, raising an eyebrow. “You can tell me. This is technically visiting, right?”

Peeta chuckled and shook his head. “Sorry, my lips are sealed.” Despite the lightness in his voice, his heart was heavy. They were going to face their deaths and he would never be able to tell her how he felt.

She was about to reply when the car slowed and they caught a glimpse of the train station. Reporters buzzed about, cameras flashing brightly as they saw the car approach. Peeta looked at Katniss and gave her a squeeze on the knee before moving to the opposite bench and readying himself for the door to open. Cameras were everywhere as he stepped onto the platform. He had never seen so many reporters in his life. They crowded in on him and he felt like he would never get to his destination. But he reached it and Katniss followed soon after. They stood together at the door to the train and waited for the okay from Effie to board.

Peeta turned to Katniss and was about to comment on the frantic reporters, but Effie was already leading her away. Someone took Peeta by the arm and led him to a compartment. There was a bed and a small table and chairs, the quality of which Peeta didn’t even know existed. Attached was a bathroom even more luxurious and a small room filled with drawers and clothes and any kind of wearable article imaginable. Something made a sound resembling a blip and he turned to the door to find a small screen had illuminated. The words  _ Dinner in one hour _ scrolled across it. Unsure of what to do, Peeta sat on the bed and waited for the hour to pass.


	8. The Reaping: Part 2

_ Katniss was hugging her father. The smell of coal lingered on his overalls and his soft touch comforted her. He was going into the mines and she had just begged him not to go. He’d simply wrapped her in a hug and told her he had to in order to feed her. His hands were rubbing circles on her back and he was whispering in her ear. _

_ “My beautiful girl.” He was saying. “My Katniss.” _

_ He kissed her hair, then again and again. His hands roaming her body and, confused, she looked up and was startled. Her father’s Seam gray eyes had been replaced by bright blue ones. His coal black hair now dirty blonde. The narrow face of her father suddenly transformed into Peeta’s wide, strong jaw. _

_ “Katniss,” He admonished, still running his hands over her body. “I need to go…” _

_ “No,” She said. “I don’t want you to go to the mines.” _

_ “I have to. I left the bakery so we could be together. Now I have to work in the mines like everyone else.” _

_ “No, Peeta, please…” She was begging, trying to hold him tighter, but he was pulling away. _

_ “I did this for you.” He said again. She felt ashamed. Why had Peeta left the bakery? For her? How could she do this to him? _

_ He was pulling away and she held onto his hand, begging him not to go. He smiled at her and granted her one last hug. She wound her arms around him as tight as she could, wishing she never had to let go. She tilted her head up to look at him and the love shining in his eyes almost blinded her. He leaned in for a kiss and she let him, ravaging his mouth and taking everything he gave. Their lips slanted against each other in fiery caresses. Peeta’s kisses were hungry and persistent. Katniss could feel herself reacting to them. Suddenly she felt like she couldn’t get enough; that she needed more from him. But all too soon he pulled away and walked towards the elevator. Every few steps he would turn to look at her and give her a sad smile, until, eventually, the doors shut and he was gone. _

_ She stood at the mine’s entrance, crying softly. When she noticed the songbirds, far away, stop the song she didn’t know they were singing, she panicked. A bad feeling rose up in her chest. She screamed Peeta’s name just as an explosion ripped through the empty elevator shaft. _

“Peeta!” Katniss said as she jerked awake, confused and heart racing. Prim stirred in her arms and looked up at her through half-lidded eyes.

“Katniss?” She whispered sleepily. “Did you have a nightmare?” A nightmare? So it was all a dream? Peeta wasn’t dead, he was safe and sound- in his own house.

Katniss exhaled and nodded slowly, pressing her hand to her forehead and wiping the beads of sweat that had collected there. “Did you have one, too?” She asked quietly. Prim nodded and Katniss leaned down to kiss her hair. “Go back to sleep, okay?”

“Okay,” She mumbled, burrowing into the softness of the bed.

Katniss lay awake, disturbed by her dream. She couldn’t remember all of it. Just her father turning into Peeta and him going into the mines and then dying like her father. No. There was more. She touched her lips, feeling their softness as she recalled the way Dream Peeta had kissed her. She took a deep breath. So what? It didn’t mean anything. People had crazy, weird dreams all the time. Just because she had kissed Peeta in her dream didn’t mean she wanted to do it in real life, did it?

Unable to sleep, Katniss eased bed and got ready to go into the woods. Maybe the calming silence of the woods would set her mind at ease. After she dressed and grabbed her game bag, she slipped into the cool morning air and made her way through the fence and into the woods.

At their usual spot on the rock outcropping, Katniss waited for Gale. It was a little early, she knew, but being out nature was better than lying awake in bed. After the better half of an hour, she heard rustling in the bushes behind her and she nocked her bow with an arrow and aimed in the direction of the bush. She was certain it was Gale, but her father had taught her she could never be too careful. He appeared through the bushed, raising an eyebrow at her aimed bow. She lowered it and sat back down. He joined her and held something out to her.

“Look what I caught.” He said, holding out a loaf of bread with an arrow sticking out of it.

She smiled softly and took it from him, wresting the arrow from the loaf and inhaling the scent. It instantly reminded her of Peeta and she handed back to him.

He frowned at her slightly before taking his hunting knife and cutting the bread in two. Katniss dug through her bag and pulled out the goat cheese Prim had left for her. She spread some on her half and handed the rest to Gale who did the same.

“What’s up with you this morning?” He asked, picking berries from the bush behind them and placing them on his bread before taking a bite.

“Nothing.” She said, copying him and placing berries on her own bread.

“Did you have nightmares again?” He asked.  _ Damn him _ , she thought. She never should have told him all those years ago.

She nodded, tight lipped and took a bite of Peeta’s bread. They sat quietly for awhile before Gale pushed the subject a little further.

“Is it because it’s Prim’s first year?” He asked.

She didn’t want to tell him about the weird dream she’d had about Peeta. Not only was it embarrassing, but it also upset her more than it had a right to. Peeta was her friend, and so was Gale, but she never dreamed about him blowing up in the mines. And if she did, she didn’t think she would be so affected by it. So she nodded instead, hoping he would drop it.

“Last night I dreamed that Rory was Reaped.” He confessed. His voice was so soft; she had to look at him. He was never sentimental. There was the pact they’d made a couple years ago that they would take care of each other’s families if the other was Reaped, but that was the most emotion she ever saw from him.

Katniss coughed to clear her throat. “I dreamt about my father, again.” Which was partly true. She was certain the beginning of the dream it was her father hugging her.

“Really, that’s it?” He asked skeptically. “You seem more upset about it than usual.”

“Really?” She asked sarcastically, pinning him with a glare. “Because I think it’s none of your business.”

Gale stared at her, returning her glare with curiosity. “Geesh, Catnip. Sorry for trying to be a good friend.”

She softened. Of course he was just looking out for her. That was what they did, wasn’t it? “Sorry.” She muttered. “It was… Really intense. My dream, I mean. I think it’s just stress from the Reaping.”

“Okay,” He said softly, looking out over the valley. He was thinking deeply about something, she could tell. He turned to her, a light in his eyes. “We could do it, you know.”

“Do what?” She asked quizzically.

“Run.” He said. “Into the forest and never come back. We could make it.”

Katniss stared at him, shocked. Where had this come from? The only thing she can think to say is, “I can’t leave Prim.”

“We can bring her. And Rory and Vick and Posy…” He adds.

“Our mothers?” She didn’t want to admit it, but the past couple months she had been getting closer to her mother.

“Them too.” He said, looking at her expectantly. “You know we could do it.”

“I can’t.” She said, suddenly thinking of Peeta. Of him being alone to fend off his mother, of never seeing or talking to him again. “I can’t leave my friends.”

“What friends?” Gale laughed. Then stopped when she didn’t join in. “You’re serious.”

“I wouldn’t have said it if I wasn’t.”

“You mean the baker’s kid?” He asked harshly.

Katniss rolled her eyes. “ _ Peeta _ is my friend and I think I would be sad if I never saw him again.”

“You think?”

“Okay, I know! I like spending time with him,” She said, pausing to give him a meaningful look, “At least we don’t spend our time bickering like you and I.”

“We don’t bicker!” He argued.

The tension broke and Katniss laughed. “Like an old married couple.”

Gale’s lips twitched up in response. “Still… We could get out of here and never have to deal with the Reaping again… Or the mines.”

Katniss felt her smile fade and she looked down at the ground. “I don’t think I could leave.”

Gale stood up suddenly and Katniss followed, unsure what was happening. “You of all people should know better.” He said.

Stunned, Katniss took a step back. “What?”

He looked mad, really mad. “You of all people should know not to get involved with someone right before the Reaping.”

Katniss’ jaw went slack and hung open in disbelief. “I’m not  _ involved _ with anyone. I never will be. That’s not what I want.”

“Well, you sure seemed to be cozying up to Mellark!” He accused.

Katniss sighed and closed her eyes briefly. “His name is  _ Peeta _ , and I haven’t been cozying up to him. He doesn’t see me that way.”

“Please, Katniss, anyone with eyes could tell he’s in love with you!”

What? That wasn’t true. Peeta definitely was not in love with her. Even if he was, she’s made it plenty clear she doesn’t want to get married. So why did her heart flutter at the thought? “He does not.” She said flatly. “Even if he did, he knows that that’s not what I want.”

“Doesn’t keep him from ogling at you, or touching you. It’s like he takes any excuse to give you a hug or pat you on the shoulder!” Gale was positively livid now. But what on earth could have made him so angry? He couldn’t possibly be jealous, could he? She ignored that particular thought.

“I don’t know what’s gotten into you, but you better knock it off.” She told him icily. “Peeta is  _ just _ my friend. And even if he wasn’t, you have  _ no _ right to tell me what I can and can’t do.” She turned towards the bush and picked up her game bag. “I’m fishing at the lake. Join me if you want, but I’m done talking about this.”

She made her way down the valley without looking back, resolving to keep both Peeta and Gale far from her thoughts. At the lake she located the poles, baited them, and set them up so she could gather surrounding plants. Gale joined her after a while and helped collect plants without speaking. They periodically checked the poles, placing caught fish in the underwater basket until they were ready to go back. Katniss saw a fat squirrel sitting on a branch and drew her bow to shoot it down without thinking. Gale gave her a look, but she ignored it and collected her prize. When they crossed the fence, Gale stopped her.

“I’m sorry, Katniss. About earlier. I guess I was just mad that you didn’t agree with my plan.” He said vaguely, no doubt wary of the Capitol listening in.

“Let’s just forget about it.” She suggested and was relieved when he nodded and said nothing further.

* * *

Katniss had no idea what had just happened. The moment Prim’s name was called, she went into autopilot, moving towards her and shouting the only thing she knew that could save her. Now she was standing on the stage, speechless as the people of District 12 gave her the three fingered salute. They recognized her sacrifice. They mourned with her. It was overwhelming. She was still thinking about it when Effie’s high, accented voice called out:

“Peeta Mellark!”

Katniss’ stomach dropped.  _ No, _ she thought.  _ No, no, no! Not Peeta! _ She searched for him in the crowd and found him instantly, standing beside one of his friends from school and looking down at the ground.  _ Look at me! _ She silently commanded. He refused, so she turned to the only one who could possibly save him. Her face twisted in anger as she saw Robbie Mellark glancing down at the ground and refusing to volunteer in his brother’s place. How could he let Peeta go into the arena? Didn’t he know how inherently  _ good _ he was? He deserved to be loved as much as Prim was. But of course, family only went so far for some people. 

He was mounting the steps now and Katniss ripped her eyes away from the coward and pinned them on her best friend. Was he her best friend? She supposed he was. He met her eyes and she could see the shock and hurt displayed in them. Her worst nightmares had come true. Not only had Prim been Reaped her first year, but so had someone else she cared about. And now she was going to have to battle her best friend to the death. She pushed the thought aside when Effie announced them and told them to shake hands. Numbly, she extended her hand towards him. He took it, then pulled her to his chest and wrapped her in a hug.

She fought back tears as he held her. She wrapped her arms tightly around him, the images of her nightmare coming back to her and she sniffled to keep the tears at bay. One of them was going to die, and she didn’t want it to be him.

He tried to say something to her as they were pulled into the Justice building, but the Peacekeepers were adamant that they move quickly to their assigned rooms. Not long after arriving in the elegant room, her mother and sister came rushing in. Prim was already crying and ran to Katniss, hugging her tightly around the middle.

“Prim, you need to remember everything I’m about to tell you, okay?” She says then turns to her mother. “You too.” Her mother nods and takes a seat beside her. Prim is pressed between them as Katniss tells them everything they need to know. She orders Prim not to take any tesserae. She tells them they can get by on selling milk and cheese from Prim’s goat. She asks her mother to take in more patients and that Gale will help gather herbs as long as she tells him exactly what to pick. She tells them that Gale will bring them meat and keep an eye out for them.

Lastly, she addresses her mother. “You can’t shut down on her.”

“Katniss, I-” Her mother begins.

“Mom, listen to me.” She says forcefully. “You can’t leave her to fend for herself, do you understand?”

“I was sick then, if I’d had the herbs I do now-”

“Then take them!” She shouts and instantly regrets it. She softens. “I won’t be there to take care of her anymore.”

Her mother nodded, tight-lipped and Prim released a sob. “Katniss, promise me you’ll come back! Promise me you’ll win!”

“I promise.” She says before she realizes what she has promised. 

“What about Peeta?” Her mother asks quietly and Katniss stiffens. Peeta? How could she forget him? Prim sniffled and looked up at her.

“Don’t kill him…” she pleads. Katniss is shocked. Of course she wouldn’t kill Peeta. She turned over all the possibilities in her mind. They could work together and fight off as many of the other tributes as possible. But if they somehow ended up as the last two tributes, one would have to kill the other. Maybe they shouldn’t team up. They could go on their own and hope that the other doesn’t meet a horrific death. Yes, that sounded good.

“I won’t.” Katniss told her. She hugged Prim tightly until the Peacekeepers came and even gave her mother a quick hug before she was ushered out.

Madge came to see her next, wishing her luck and asking her to wear a pin. Katniss took it uncertainly, not knowing why Madge was so friendly all of the sudden. But maybe she had been the whole time, in her own way. Maybe Katniss wasn’t alone when she thought the silence between them was an understanding. She had a feeling Madge had been her friend all along.

Mr. Mellark came in a few minutes later, which surprised her. It surprised her even more when he gave her a shoulder a squeeze and handed her a wrapped bundle. She thanked him and opened it, finding two cheese buns inside. Her favorite.

“Peeta?” She asked, knowing the answer.

“He once told me those were your favorite.” He said sadly. He looked as if he had already lost his son.

“Peeta’s not gone yet,” She reminded him. “He might win, he’s strong.”

He smiled at her knowingly, like it was some inside joke. “No, I don’t think he’ll win…”

“Don’t give up on him so easily!” She yelled angrily. Peeta had just as much chance making it out of the arena as she did, why was he acting as if there wasn’t a choice?

“I’m not the one giving up.” He said softly. What does that mean? Katniss didn’t have time to ponder because he left and the Peacekeepers shoved another body through the door into the room. Gale.

“Two minutes.” One of the Peacekeepers warned.

He ran up to her and hugged her tight and she hugged him back. “Take care of them!” She requested. He rested his head on top of hers and whispered his promise that he would. When she pulled back, there was a strange emotion in his eyes.

“Katniss-” He started.

“I’m sorry! I should have said yes this morning.” She interrupted. And at the moment she meant it. If she had said yes, maybe they could have gotten their families out on time and she wouldn’t have to face the impossible task before her.

Gale laid a hand against her cheek and she startled. But he was speaking before she could think on it. “No, it was too late by then. I should have suggested it sooner.” She had to look away from the pain in his eyes. “Don’t trust any of them, even Peeta.”

She looked up sharply. “Why not?”

“Would you trust any other tribute?”

“No, but-”

“Why wouldn’t you trust them?”

“Because they’re probably only thinking about their own survival, they could betray me at any time.” Why was he saying this? And why was he touching her so intimately?

“Exactly.” He rubbed his thumb over her cheek bone. “Peeta’s no different. He’s only thinking about himself now. Don’t fall for his charm.”

“But Peeta-”

“Katniss, please!” He said desperately, eyes slightly wild. “Please, you can’t trust him, not anymore.”

“And if it was  _ you  _ in the arena?” She challenged.

“You couldn’t trust me either.”

She paused. Did he really mean that? She couldn’t imagine a world where she couldn’t trust Gale. They had helped keep each other alive for so long. She couldn’t imagine not trusting Peeta either, but she had already planned not to team up with him. She nodded to put his mind at ease. “Okay, I won’t trust him.”

He sighed in relief and the Peacekeepers came in, not bothering to tell Gale to leave. They just came up and began to lead him away. He struggled at first, saying he had one last thing to say, but they ignored him. Just before he reached the door, Gale shouted.

“Katniss, I-” The door slammed on the rest of his words, leaving Katniss bewildered.

On the train, Effie Trinket led her to her set of rooms and told her to be ready in an hour for dinner, then left her alone. She explored the rooms, wondering if Peeta’s were similar and where he was. Maybe she should search for him? The thought left her mind as she wandered into the bathroom and saw the extravagant shower. She’d never had a shower before. She quickly locked the door behind her and turned the water on, marveling that there was a tap for hot water. It took some adjusting to get the temperature right, but when she did, she stripped down and stepped inside. A sigh of pleasure escaped her lips as the warm water cascaded down her shoulders. It was the best feeling in the world.

She found it surprisingly easy to let her mind wander under the water’s pressure. She thought about her strategy for the games, what angle she should play. Perhaps she should come in with all she’s got or play a meek, defenseless little girl like the tribute from District 7 did years ago. What would Peeta’s strategy be? She let her mind race and found that Peeta came up in her thoughts more often than not. The way he’d comforted her that morning. The way his arms felt around her. The dream she’d had about him, especially the kiss. The need. She felt her face heat and a pleasant shiver ran down her spine despite the warmth of the water. She decided that was enough thinking about Peeta. In a few days, one or both of them would be dead.

Katniss shut off the water and toweled herself off with a surprisingly warm towel. She entered the dressing room and riffled through the drawers, finally picking out a dark green shirt and black pants. She took Madge’s pin and pinned it to her shirt, admiring the craftsmanship of her father’s favorite bird. Effie knocked on her door, announcing dinner and Katniss followed her to the dining car. Peeta was already there, sitting at the long table. When they came in, he flashed her an uncertain smile.

_ Don’t trust him _ , Gale’s voice said to her. She returned the smile, but sat across from him instead of the seat beside him. If it bothered him, he didn’t show it. She felt herself becoming awkward as the meal went on, fidgeting with her utensils and napkin between courses. Their mentor, Haymitch, hadn’t bothered to show up for dinner, and any conversation Effie attempted was met with one word answers from both of them. Halfway through the third course, Effie made a comment on their manners and it made Katniss’ blood boil. She made a point to eat with her hands for the rest of the meal, and every time she caught Peeta’s eye, she could tell he was struggling to keep from laughing.

After dinner, Effie motioned them to a different car to watch a recap of the Reapings. The entertainment car was full of plush, velvet couches and chairs. A bar stood off to one side and was attended by a Capitol man in a white uniform. A giant television was the focus of the room and Effie quickly steered them to the couch directly in front of it while she took a chair off to the side. Katniss took a seat on one side and felt her heartbeat quicken when Peeta took the sat next to her.

The other tributes’ faces went by in a blur. Katniss was preoccupied by Peeta’s leg, close enough to occasionally brush against hers. When the on-screen announcers introduced District 12, Katniss focused her attention on the screen. She saw Prim on the screen, walking toward the stage fearfully. Then she saw herself stumble into the open space dividing the girls and boys. She heard herself call Prim’s name, saw herself push Prim away as she volunteered. The announcers commented on how sweet the moment was and Katniss resisted the urge to throw something at the screen. They were silent when her people gave her the salute, unsure of what to say. Then Haymitch Abernathy makes his drunken debut and the announcers laugh.

She looked at Peeta when Effie announces his name on the screen. He watched intently and glanced sideways at her before offering a small, reassuring smile. Katniss turned back to the television, watching as Effie introduces them. She watched them hug and she was shocked at how intimate it looked. Of course the announcers picked up on it.

“Could there be a romance blossoming between the tributes of District 12?” The blue haired announcer asked.

“Looks like it, Venire!” His co-host replied excitedly.

“Thas actually a- great an- _ gle _ .” A slurred voice said from the bar behind them. Katniss and Peeta turned to see Haymitch leaning unstably against the bar. “We should go for it.”

Katniss was about to tell him exactly where he can stick his ideas, but he swayed on his feet and hit the floor. She rolled her eyes and stood, following after Peeta who was already trying to haul their mentor to his feet. Katniss ignored Effie’s comments of dignified behavior and helped Peeta get the man to his feet. He smelled like white liquor and vomit and she fought her own bile rising in her throat.

They half-carried, half-dragged Haymitch to his room, where he sunk to his knees and vomited on the carpet. Katniss let out a disgusted groan. How is she going to keep her dinner down now?

“It’s okay, Katniss, I can get it from here.” Peeta told her gently. “Go get some sleep.”

“Thanks, Peeta.” She whispered gratefully, trying to breathe through her mouth to keep her from smelling the acidic smell filling the room. She doesn’t have to be told twice, she exited the room and quickly found her own. She stripped to her underwear and slipped into bed, sighing contently at the plushness. She was asleep before she had time to analyze any part of the day.


	9. The Capitol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was hard for me to write. I’m still not 100% happy with it, but I don’t think there’s anything else I can do. Big shout out to Mjenney21 for proof-reading and making suggestions, you rock!  
> Anyway, stick it out through this chapter and I promise the next one will be good!  
> -Abi

The next morning, Peeta sat beside Haymitch at the table, staring wide eyed at the mountains of food before him. He’d never seen so much food. Or such strange food. Thankfully, he was familiar with most of the pastries. They made them in his family’s bakery. There was a mug of something dark in front of him; he reached for it, thinking it was coffee. The past few months he had drank a cup every morning before school, and now he craved it. Surprisingly, it wasn’t the bitter flavor of coffee he tasted after his first sip, but the sweetness of chocolate. It was, hands down, the best drink he had ever had. After finishing his second cup of what Effie called “hot chocolate,” Peeta asked for coffee. It wasn’t until half the cup was gone that he felt his craving ebb.

Katniss walked into the room just as Peeta accepted a large plate of eggs. Her hair was slightly mussed but still bound, and the bags that were under her eyes were somewhat less noticeable. He was glad she had gotten some sleep. Even if he hadn’t. She sat down across from him like she did the night before, and he offered her a bright smile.

“Try this,” He pushed the recently filled cup of hot chocolate towards her. “It’s amazing.”

She eyed him carefully, then took the cup, raising it to her nose and inhaling. When she took a cautious sip, he reddened at her moan of pleasure. How often had he dreamed of her making that sound? The very thought of her had kept him awake the previous night. Peeta kept his eyes on his food, fighting his arousal and trying to think of anything  _ but  _ her. He ate slowly, unable to resist the temptation of glancing at Katniss occasionally from under his lashes.

Peeta was about to say something, anything to abate his sudden awkwardness. A hand on his arm snapped his attention back to Katniss. She wasn’t one to initiate contact, so he was instantly worried. Her expression was soft, though, grateful even. It probably wasn’t obvious to anyone, but Peeta knew Katniss well enough to interpret her various expressions.

“Thanks,” She whispered, her cheeks turning red. “For last night.” She used her eyes to gesture to where Haymitch was sitting. He understood immediately.

He gave her a dazzling smile, chuckling softly. “It’s okay, Katniss. I know how much you hate sick people.”

Her eyes rolled skyward. “I don’t  _ hate _ sick people. They just… gross me out.”

“I know.” He winked.

“You guys have great chemistry.” Haymitch commented loudly from his seat and Katniss jerked her hand away from him. Peeta’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion at his sudden contribution to the conversation. He looked over at Katniss to see her irritated expression. She opened her mouth to say something, but Effie cut her off.

“It’s true?” She asked incredulously with her ridiculous Capitol accent. “You two are a couple? If that’s the case, we need to have a  _ serious _ discussion about proper conduct!”

“We’re not together!” Katniss practically yelled, and Peeta stared at her, unable to keep his disappointment from showing. 

“Fine, Sweetheart,” Haymitch said, picking up a cup of coffee and pointing it at her. “But it would be a great angle to play to the sponsors. They'll eat it up. You’d just hold hands and kiss in dark hallways- the Capitol will go nuts! You’ll have a lot of sponsors. Think of all the stuff I’d be able to send you. Food, water, weapons… Then when you guys are in the arena, you can team up and-”

“No!” Katniss shouted, then lowered her voice as she stood. “We are not teaming up.” Katniss avoided Peeta’s eyes and left the compartment.

Peeta was up in an instant, hitting the table with his thighs and rattling the china. Ignoring the pain and Effie’s protests, he ran after Katniss. She had stopped in the vestibule between two train cars, and she must have felt his presence, because she sighed and wrapped her arms tightly around herself. Peeta approached her carefully, and she stiffened momentarily when he laid a hand on her shoulder. 

“Katniss, what’s wrong?” He asked, letting the concern lace his voice. Katniss exhaled and finally turned to face him. His heart broke at the unshed tears in her eyes, and he staggered a bit when she stepped forward to hug him.

“I can’t.” She mumbled against his chest. Peeta’s breath hitched, but his arms instinctively wrapped around her. He rubbed her back soothingly, remembering the way he held her just the day before.

“You can’t what?” He asked softly. 

She pulled back a bit to wipe at her eyes with the sleeve of her shirt and looked up at him. “I can’t watch you die, Peeta. You’re my best friend.”

He furrowed his brows, knowing where she was going with this conversation. “I don’t want to watch you die either, but I’m not letting you go into the arena alone. I want to protect you.”

Her gaze turned hard and fierce. “We can’t team up.” She said forcefully. “There’s only one winner.”

He was amazed by the speed in which she transformed. One moment she was a sad, heartbroken girl, the next, she was a fierce and determined warrior. Peeta swallowed hard. “And you have a real chance-”

“So do you.” She argued. “There’s only a few ways this can turn out.” She stepped back out of his arms and held up a finger. “One: we both die.” She added a finger. “Two: you win and I break my promise to Prim; leaving her and my mother to fend for themselves.” She looked away and added a third finger. “Or three: I win and have to go back to District Twelve without you.”

The gravity of the situation was not lost on Peeta. He knew those were the three options. But hearing them from her mouth made it real and that much more devastating. He felt an overwhelming urge to tell her he loved her. To tell her the second option wasn’t really an option. That he would rather die than live without her. But if she had reacted so badly to the idea of a fake romance, how much worse would she react to his true feelings? Instead, he stayed quiet.

“So,” She broke the silence. “We can’t team up, Peeta. And we can’t have a fake romance, people will never believe it.”

He snapped out of his thoughts to give her a serious look. “If it means more sponsors, maybe we should give it a try.”

She let out a frustrated sigh. “They’ll expect us to team up in the arena!”

“And all we have to do is tell them it’s too hard, that we can’t watch each other die.” He said, feeling his anger rise. Why didn’t she understand what he was doing? “Like you just did.” The last part came out broken and he had to look away before she could see his intentions in his eyes.

She shook her head. “I… I don’t think I can fake something like that.” She finally confessed.

Peeta had to close his eyes to fight off the onslaught of emotions threatening to overtake him. Somewhere deep down, he knew Katniss would never go for it. He remembered clearly what she had told him on her birthday. She didn’t want to get married. Apparently the answer to his question was never; Katniss never wanted to get married, even if the relationship was fake. It stung.

“Okay.” He said at last, settling for a compromise. “We won’t play the romance. But you can’t pull away from me, Katniss.” He narrowed his eyes at her. “I’m going to need my best friend over the next week. I need you to be there for me, just like I’ll be there for you.”

Katniss eyed him carefully, thinking deeply about something. Finally she nodded once. “Okay. I’ll try.”

Peeta took a step closer to her and swept a stray strand of hair behind her ear. “Go get something to eat. I’ll talk to Haymitch about another strategy.”

She was about to retort, but he gave her an admonishing look. “Please, Katniss. You haven’t eaten anything yet and you’ll need to keep up your strength.”

“I don’t want to go back there.” She sighed. “I know I haven’t known him long, but I already don’t like Haymitch.”

Peeta chuckled. “I can tell. Just grab a plate of food and head to a different room.”

“Okay.” She said before stepping around him and heading back the way they came. Peeta took a moment to collect his thoughts and calm his racing heart.

When he returned to the dining car, Katniss was exciting through the other door and into the entertainment car. Effie and Haymitch were arguing about something loudly. In Peeta’s muddled state, he couldn’t bring himself to care what it was about. He sat down at his chair, frowning at the forgotten and suddenly unappealing food left on his plate.

“So I take it our little ray of sunshine doesn’t want to play her part.” Haymitch said to him after telling Effie, rather nastily, to be quiet.

Peeta nodded. “She won’t do the romance. And she won’t team up in the arena.”

Haymitch shrugged. “Oh well. It’s not the worst case. Plus, it makes for a tragic story. The Capitol loves that stuff- one-sided romances and what not.”

Peeta drew his brows up in confusion. “One-sided?”

Haymitch waved his now empty coffee cup around until one of the Capitol staff members refilled it. He took a long drink and set the cup down before explaining. “Sure! I’ve seen it before. Poor mannered, low-scoring tributes are often overlooked and not well-liked in the Capitol. The mentors will sometimes have a Victor or someone well known declare their love for the tribute and suddenly their swimming in donations. I’ve never seen it with another tribute, though. And it might take some acting on your part, to make everyone believe you’re really in love with her.”

“I do love her.” Peeta said before he realized what he was saying. He looked up to Haymitch quickly, panic in his eyes.

“Oh ho, ho!” Haymitch smirked, raising an eyebrow. “Well that makes your job a whole lot easier.”

“She’ll kill me if I tell her.” Peeta whispered fearfully. 

“Better wait to do it until the last moment then.” Haymitch commented. “Now onto the more important stuff. In way of skills, what do you have?”

“Uh…” He hesitated. What skills did he have? He could draw and make cakes… But those skills were useless in the arena. “Nothing…”

Haymitch studied him carefully. “You look sort of strong… Maybe we can work with that. Now what about your sweetheart?”

Peeta gave him a hard look at the nickname before answering. “She hunts. With a bow. When she brings my dad squirrels, they’re shot through the eye.” He paused. “She’s got a reputation in parts of Twelve where she sells her game.”

“Through the eye, you say?” Haymitch asked, rubbing his hand over his jaw and draining the rest of his coffee. “Sounds promising.”

“She is.” Peeta confirmed.

“Maybe it’s best if you two don’t team up. I’d hate for you two to be the last ones left.”

Peeta shook his head then pierced Haymitch with an earnest look. “No, that’s not a problem. If it comes down to me or Katniss, it’ll be Katniss. I won’t live without her.”

A choked sob came from the other end of the table and Peeta and Haymitch turned their attention to the forgotten Effie. She was sitting hunched in her chair as she brought a bright pink handkerchief up to wipe at her eyes. “How romantic!” She cried.

Peeta turned to Haymitch, who tilted his head. “See? They eat it up.” Peeta smiled grimly as Haymitch stood and walked to the window. “We’ll talk more later, we’re heading into the Capitol. Oh, and boy? When we get there, don’t protest the remake. Whatever they do to you in there, just let them. Never know who they’re going to gossip to and you both need to look strong. Pass it along to your sweetheart.”

Peeta nodded to his mentor and stood also, deciding to find Katniss. He made his way into the entertainment car and found her sitting on one of the plush chairs. She looked up at him as he entered.

“We’re entering the Capitol.” He said, stuffing his hands into his pockets. “Just thought you should know.”

She nodded and walked to the large window, gazing outwards. He heard her sharp intake of breath and sigh of wonder. He rushed to the window to see what the fuss was about and gasped. He had never seen so many buildings. Or such tall buildings. The largest building in District Twelve was the Justice Building and it was only three stories high. The buildings here looked to be a hundred stories or higher, clustered together and fighting each other for dominance.

“Oh! I almost forgot!” Peeta said as the train slowed down. He quickly turned to Katniss, tugging on her shoulder as he turned her to face him. “Haymitch said to let the Capitol do whatever they want when we get to the remake center.” Her eyes flashed angry and defiant, but Peeta held up his hand to stop her protest. “We have to look strong for them, Katniss. Just let them.”

She sighed heavily but nodded her head. He gave in to his desires and quickly brushed his lips against her forehead, ignoring her bewildered expression. They exited the room and headed down the hallway of the car. Effie was waiting by the door to the vestibule and her eyes widened when she saw them approach.

“You  _ really  _ shouldn’t be alone together.” She scolded in a high voice. She brought the back of her hand to her forehead and sighed dramatically. Katniss rolled her eyes at him and gave him a smile that he returned. “Come along, we’ll talk more about  _ propriety  _ later.” Effie said as she ushered the two of them into the main train car and positioned them in front of the door.

When the elegant glass doors of the train opened, Peeta and Katniss were greeted with flashes from a hundred different cameras. Peeta turned on his charm, waving and grinning at everybody. He was hoping the Capitol would like his reaction to their city and lifestyle. Beside him, Katniss was stiff, and her expression was neutral at best. He knew she was just taking everything in, but to everyone else, she looked detached and almost rude. He nudged Katniss with his elbow, eliciting a scowl from her. He raised an eyebrow and nodded towards the crowd and cameras.

“Isn’t this great?” He said, exaggerating his pleasant tone, hoping she would get the hint.

“Uh… Yeah, I guess so.” She said, then studied him. When he smiled encouragingly at her, she returned it before turning to the crowd and smiling for them.  She looked awkward, but at least she stopped looking cold. The crowd cheered for them as they were led from the train to a vehicle and transported to the remake center.

* * *

Haymitch’s words came back to Peeta as the workers in the remake center washed and buffed him. He thought he had been doing a good job keeping his mouth shut as they poked and prodded him, but when they took a porous stone to his feet, he couldn’t hold in his yelp. His feet had always been sensitive. By the time they were done scrubbing, Peeta’s knuckles were white, and his hands ached from gripping the chair.

It was hours before he saw Katniss again. He waited the last ten minutes or so before the tribute parade by the other tributes. Some of them were conversing with others, but Peeta was too anxious about Katniss to be friendly. So instead, he waited by the horses and the two-wheeled cart that was supposed to carry them. Haymitch had just left him by the cart with a number twelve on the side and said to wait until he was told to do so otherwise. His stylist, Portia, had been standing next to him, but now she had run off with one of the other Capitol people, talking excitedly. He liked his stylist; they got along great despite her eccentric Capitol ways. Well, Peeta usually got along with everyone. Maybe Portia had gotten that sense and deemed it safe to leave him standing there by himself.

When he finally saw Katniss, he couldn’t stop staring at her. Her hair was the same as it had been earlier, braided and tucked into an elegant bun. He had never seen her in makeup and while he definitely prefered her without it, he couldn’t deny how striking she looked. She wore a black unitard, just like his, and it hugged her tight, showing off curves he didn’t know she had. When she approached where he stood by their chariot, he grinned before not-so-subtly eyeing her from head to toe.

“Oh, no.” He groaned in mock horror, fighting a smirk. 

She gave him a perplexed look before looking down at herself. “What?”

“They dressed us in the same outfit.” He said teasingly. “My stylist mentioned it was one of the worst crimes- to be dressed exactly like someone else.”

She rewarded his joke with a roll of her eyes. “Yes, well, I’m a little more worried about the  _ fire _ my stylist mentioned. Did yours say anything more than ‘trust me?’”

“Not really.” He admitted ruefully. “But don’t worry. They can’t kill us before the Games even start.”

Katniss laughed despite herself before turning her attention to the other tributes in front of them. They were the last in the lineup and had a good view of everyone before them. Katniss's features turned serious and calculating as she studied the other faces. “It didn’t seem real up until now.” She whispered.

Peeta stepped closer to her and reached out to lay a hand on her shoulder. He squeezed it reassuringly, smiling softly at her. “Hey.” She turned her head and looked him in the eyes. “It’s going to be okay. I’m here for you.”

Katniss regarded him for a long moment before sighing and looking down at her joined, fidgeting hands. “Not for long... “ She inhaled deeply and brought her gaze up to lock with his. “How do you do it?”

“Do what?” He asked, perplexed. He took the hand on her shoulder and slid it down her arm, catching her hand in his and giving it a squeeze. God, he loved touching her.

“Not freak out.” She said vehemently. “The only reason I’m holding on is because I’ve been determined not to think about it. But now…”

Peeta’s expression fell, and he had to look away from her face. He understood. It was difficult, but his determination to keep her alive was what drove him onward. He couldn’t tell her that, though. “I honestly don’t know.” He said instead, dropping her hand and reaching over to scratch an imaginary itch on the back of his hand. “But I do know I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you alive. You’re my best friend, Katniss.”

She scrunched her face up in bewilderment. “What? Peeta you can’t-”

“Katniss!” A masculine voice interrupted her. Peeta turned to see a surprisingly normal man walk towards them. After seeing so many ridiculously dressed Capitol people, Peeta was relieved that not  _ all _ of them wore crazy attire.  “You must be Peeta. I’m Cinna, Katniss's stylist.” He held out his hand to Peeta as he approached and Peeta shook it. Portia appeared behind Cinna out of nowhere and flashed them a wicked smile.

“Ready for some fireworks?” She winked.

“Where’s Haymitch?” Katniss asked, ignoring Portia and looking around for their mentor.

“He’ll be waiting for you at the training center.” Cinna supplied. “Okay, you two. Up on the chariot.”

Peeta and Katniss did as he said. Cinna and Portia buzzed about them, adjusting their clothing, makeup and hair. When their stylists were satisfied, they stepped off the cart and stood off to one side. They advised both Peeta and Katniss to smile and wave at the people. Peeta felt anxious about it. Not for himself, but for Katniss. She wasn’t exactly friendly. As the massive doors opened in front of the District one tributes, Cinna set them on ‘fire’ and wished them luck. The horses pulling their chariot began moving without instruction and they were off. Peeta took one last look over his shoulder and saw Cinna waving at them. He was gesticulating wildly to his hand, pointing at Peeta and Katniss, and then clasping his hands together.

“What is he trying to say?” Katniss asked, seeing Cinna pointing at them.

“I think he wants us to hold hands.” Peeta said, trying to hide his elation. He hadn’t held hands with Katniss since her birthday. Without waiting for a reply, Peeta grabbed her hand and held it tightly.

Katniss looked down at their joined hands, an unreadable expression on her face. When she finally looked up, Peeta could see the nervousness in her eyes. He leaned his head in close to hers and gave her a chaste, encouraging kiss on her cheek. He was pulling back as they passed through the giant archway. The noise that had been steadily building as they approached the doors was now deafening.

“You’ll do great.” Peeta told her sincerely before straightening and facing the crowd. He waved politely and smiled broadly, stealing glances at Katniss to make sure she was doing okay. She seemed to be doing fine, she waved and smiled at the cheering people. When they started chanting her name, she turned incredulous eyes toward him and he chuckled at her astonishment. He couldn’t blame them, she looked breathtaking.

The rest of the parade passed without incident. President snow welcomed them and launched into a speech that Peeta couldn’t bring himself to listen to. Then the horses pulled the tributes into the training center, where everyone stepped down from the chariots. Peeta stepped down first and offered Katniss a hand as she followed. Cinna and Portia extinguished their fake flames and steered them towards the elevators, where Haymitch stood waiting for them. As the walked the short distance to their mentor, Peeta was surprised by the number of malicious looks from other tributes and mentors. He felt Katniss tense beside him and knew she had noticed as well.

“Don’t worry about them.” Haymitch said as they reached him. “They’re just jealous. You two did great, by the way. Nice touch with the hand holding.” Katniss rolled her eyes, a gesture Peeta was well familiar with. 

“Oh, Katniss!” A shrill voice interrupted whatever Haymitch was about to say. They all turned to see Effie walk towards them. “You looked positively stunning! I’ve already had someone hint that they might be interested in sponsoring you.”

Katniss didn’t smile at the compliment, instead she looked down at her feet. Peeta saw the hint of a flush rise on her neck.  _ She’s embarrassed _ , he thought. He smiled before turning away and catching everyone’s attention with a cough.

“What about me, Effie?” He said, plastering a hopeful look on his face. “Was I stunning?”

The small group around him chuckled and Effie waved her hand in dismissal. “Of course, Peeta. You were marvelous! Now, let’s go up to our floor and prepare...”

Peeta let Effie’s words trail from his mind and glanced at Katniss from the corner of his eye. She looked back, gratitude shining in her eyes as they were led to a group of elevators. Effie talked the entire ride to the twelfth floor. She showed Peeta and Katniss their rooms, the dining room, and the living room before allowing them to go and change for dinner.

Peeta was grateful to allowed to change himself this time. Like the train, the closet was already full of clothes that fit him perfectly. He wondered briefly if it was someone’s job to take the tributes’ measurements and then grab one of everything in that size to take to each tributes rooms. He stood in front of one of the drawers, puzzling over the multitude of perfectly folded cloth. What were they? He pulled one of the bundles and shook it out, revealing them to be trousers. Surprising, considering their bright green color. He eyed the fluorescent fabric warily before returning it to it’s spot. Finally, after much uncertain deliberation, he decided on some tan pants and a dark maroon sweater.

He must have taken a longer time to get dressed than he thought, because when he made his way down the wide hallway, he could already hear voices coming from the dining room. He could make out Haymitch’s rough voice asking a question he didn’t quite catch. What he heard with crystal clarity, though, was Katniss’s smooth reply.

“I don’t want to train together.”


	10. What If?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay! We're all caught up! Woot! I thought it would take longer than it did, but oh well. Hope you guys enjoy!

Katniss waited until she was alone in the entertainment car of the train before letting the dam of her mind break free.  _ What the hell just happened? _ She thought, absently biting off a piece of toast.  _ I can’t believe I lost control of myself in front of Peeta like that. _ She’d cried for goodness’ sake! Maybe it was just the reality of the situation finally making its way through the barrier she put up.

For the last twenty-four hours, Katniss had shoved every thought of what was to come away from her mind. It was the only way she could think to handle it. In the back of her mind, though, she knew that either she or her best friend would be dead in a few days. She could feel phantoms of Peeta’s arms wrapped around her. She had resolved to push aside her thoughts about Peeta as well, but maybe she could afford a couple minutes of internal deliberation.

Safety. That was what Peeta had become to her in the last few months. She tried to push him away, to avoid getting too close, but he found his way into her heart anyhow. What was this feeling? It was similar to what she felt for Gale. She had figured that out a while ago. She was comfortable in Peeta’s presence to the point that she found herself wanting to share personal details with him. They talked easily. But there was something different. In all the years she’s known Gale, he’s never been able to comfort her. He’s tried, on multiple occasions, but it didn’t have the same effect as Peeta’s arms.

_ What am I doing? _ She thought desperately, feeling her cheeks heat.  _ I can’t think about him like that! We’re going to die soon. _ She shoved her feelings and wayward thoughts into the space in the back of her mind and locked them away. Her breakfast sat mostly untouched in front of her and the thought of wasting food drove her to finish every last bite. Then she waited for Peeta to come and get her.

* * *

 

Katniss stared at her reflection in the full length mirror. Stark naked. She should feel embarrassed or shy, but all she can do is frown at the ribs sticking out of her sides. A door opened beside her and she turned her head to see a man walking towards her. Dark, short-cropped hair, green eyes. He looked surprisingly normal for a Capitol citizen.

“Hello, Katniss.” The man greeted as he circles around her. “I’m Cinna. I’ll be your stylist.” Katniss didn’t know what to do, so she just stood there. Cinna circled her slowly, eyeing her flesh with an indifferent expression. Thankfully, it wasn’t long before he handed her a robe and motioned her to sit down. He ordered lunch for the two of them. A lot of it. Cinna made a comment about how she must hate the Capitol because of it. 

Katniss decided that she liked him.

* * *

 

Ridiculous. That’s how she felt in her outfit. It was way too tight. Tighter than anything anyone in District Twelve would wear, including the desperate girls vying for Cray’s attention. The black, unfamiliar fabric was tight but flexible. While she was grateful for the extra mobility, she was sure that’s why her figure seemed to jump out at her in the mirror. She hated it. All it did was emphasize her too small waist and thin limbs. 

Peeta didn’t seem to mind her outfit, though. He was wearing something very similar and she forced herself not to think about the way it emphasized his broad chest and thick muscles. Then he made her laugh, despite their situation. It was one of the things she really liked about him. He was always so easy going, so unlike herself. She wanted to know how he stayed so…  _ positive _ all the time. When he trailed his hand down her arm, she felt goosebumps rise in its wake. The roar of the people beyond the gates distracted her from thinking on it and made her stomach flutter nervously. Katniss had never really liked people, and now she had to try and win them over.

She grew silent as Cinna and Portia, Peeta’s stylist, primped them. After their capes and headpieces were set on fire, the chariots began moving. Katniss could feel her heart pounding in her chest as they got closer to the gate. Sweat gathered in her palms and she wiped them on her suit in her fidgeting. Movement caught her eye and she turned back to see Cinna making strange gestures at her and Peeta.

“What is he trying to say?” She asked aloud, furrowing her brows in perplextion.

“I think he wants us to hold hands.” Peeta answered. 

Without waiting for her to reply, he grabbed her hand and held it tightly. This did nothing to help her resolve to not think about him. She looked down at their hands. His strong, warm hand grounded her to the present and she was grateful to have something to hold onto. But the crowd was getting closer and louder. Katniss felt a wave of nausea and she looked up into Peeta’s eyes. He somehow always knew what she was thinking.

It surprised her when he swooped in for gentle kiss on her cheek just as they were passing the gate. A million voices seemed to scream inside her head at what had just happened.  _ That’s the second time today he’s kissed me _ , she thought.

“You’ll do great.” Peeta said. His voice seemed to cut through all the noise around them. His words gave her the little boost she needed to smile and actually wave to people in the crowd. It was astonishing. People were cheering for her. She thought the crowd got louder because they passed the gate and there was nothing to absorb the sounds. But then the crowd started chanting her name and she looked up at one of the giant screens to see to otherworldly beings. 

It took her a moment to realize it was her and Peeta. They looked stunning. She looked back over to Peeta, eyes going wide at the praise and attention of so many people. His lips turned upward and he could see his chest shake with laughter she couldn’t hear over the crowd. The sight was breathtaking, but she forced herself to turn her head back to the people.

After a long, boring, and slightly infuriating speech from President Snow, they were allowed to go to their rooms. Effie led them all to a group of elevators, where they waited for one to become available. Katniss tried to listen to what Effie was saying, she really did. It was hard to concentrate on what she was saying whenever she felt Peeta’s eyes on her.  _ What’s happening to me? _ She thought desperately as they all filed into the empty elevator.

As Effie reviewed their schedule for the next few days, Katniss became hyper-aware of Peeta standing next to her. Although they weren’t touching, she could feel the heat radiating from him. Her concentration broke and she cursed herself for missing whatever Effie was saying. It could be important. The elevator binged and came to a stop. Their escort showed them the entire floor, which was all theirs, and left them all to change for dinner.

In the solitude of her room, Katniss finally released a troubled breath. Everything was so confusing. She could no longer ignore things. If she was going to get through this, she needed to sort everything out. So, she made a list of things she had been ignoring and tried to straighten them out.

_ Okay, _  she thought to herself as she walked to the closet.  _ I like Peeta. _ Relief swelled in her chest at the confession, even if it was only to herself. She continued.  _ Why is that bad? People have crushes all the time, right? _ She paused in front of the closet door and found a small control panel off to the side. A multitude of options greeted her when she touched the screen: casual, formal, semi-formal, black tie formal, sleepwear, business casual… The list went on. Of course she could just rifle through all the drawers and hangers, but this seemed to do the thinking for her. She selected casual and then her favorite colors. It produced gray, lightweight pants and a dark green shirt.

In the bathroom, she picked up her train of thought. She can’t like Peeta because one or, more likely, both of them were going to die. Besides, what if he didn’t like her? Rejection seemed more frightening than her inevitable death. Other than her feelings, Katniss realized she had been trying to push Peeta away as well. Most tributes from the same district in previous games would team up. There was a sense of camaraderie to them and they usually trusted each other. It never ended well. Even for the Career tributes. Katniss never understood the idea of teams in the arena. What’s the point if everyone else is going to die?

That leaves her two options. One, go all in and team up with Peeta; maybe even confess her feelings. Or two, cut him off and avoid the pain of watching him die. Images of her father burning in the mine flashed through her mind and she flung out an arm to catch herself. Leaning against the wall, she waited for the images and the pain in her chest to subside. She hadn’t been present for her father’s death (thank goodness), but it didn’t make it hurt any less. How much more would it hurt to actually  _ see _ her best friend die?

She didn’t realize she was crying until the hot tear trailed down her cheek. She swiped at it furiously, hating her new weakness. That’s what Peeta was now. A weakness. If anyone knew about her feelings, they would use it against her.  _ Forget it _ , she thought.  _ My only goal now is to make my way back to Prim. She’s the only one I’m capable of loving _ .

Thankfully, Peeta wasn’t in the dining room when she entered. Haymitch was, though. Maybe he could help her out with her predicament. She took the seat next to him and tried to ignore the pungent smell of liquor rolling off of him in waves.

“How does this work?” She asked abruptly, ignoring his curious glance.

“How does  _ what _ work, exactly?” He countered.

“The arena, the training… Everything.”

“Depends on what you want to do and how good you are at surviving.” He said, leaning back in his chair and taking a sip from his flask.

“I can survive.” She said, frowning at the table.

“Good. The boy said you can shoot. That true?”

Katniss looked up sharply and narrowed her eyes. Why would Peeta tell him that? “Yeah..” She answered carefully.

“Hmm.” He scratched his chin. “They don’t always have bows. What else can you do?”

“I can fish and make traps. I know a lot about edible plants…And I know a little about healing.” She listed off everything she’s done to help her family survive.

Haymitch nodded silently. “What if you can’t find things or you need something? You need sponsors so I can send you things in the arena.”

“How do I get sponsors?” She asked.

Haymitch laughed sardonically. “You charm them.”

Katniss blanched. She couldn’t charm anyone. “Is there any other way to get sponsors?” She asked hopefully.

“Sorry, Sweetheart.” He chuckled. “People sponsor their favorite tributes. Their favorite tributes are the most charismatic. The most beautiful. And the tributes with the highest chance at winning.”

Katniss sighed dejectedly. There was no way she could get any sponsors. She was standoffish, average-looking and untrained compared to the Career tributes.

Haymitch cleared his throat. “We could always try something else…”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “Like what?” she asked warily.

“I have a feeling people will like Peeta. He’s got a shot at winning, he’s not bad looking and charming as hell. If he says he loves you, Panem will too. And then we can have a tragic love story to drive the Capitol wild.”

A love story?! Katniss’s eyes grew wide at his suggestion. Surely a “love story” would require them to team up. Besides, hadn’t they already talked about this? “I already told you I wouldn’t do the romance.” She told him, irritated.

“I don’t get you.” He said, exasperated. “The boy’s your friend, ain’t he? Why wouldn’t you want to help him out?”

She glowered at him instead of answering. Her reasons were her own. He scoffed at her and took another long drink from his little metal container. Katniss crossed her arms in front of her. 

“Fine. Whatever you want,  _ sweetheart _ .” He sneered. “Good luck getting any sponsors.”

“Fine.” Katniss agreed angrily.

Her mentor closed his eyes and sighed deeply. “Now, about your training.” He said, eyes still closed. When he finally opened them, he gave her a grim look. “Don’t spend time on things you already know. Move around and find something you think would be useful. I’m guessing you don’t want to train with him either. Right?”

Katniss frowned. The less time they spent together, the less it would hurt. Right? She gathered herself to reply as smoothly as she could. “I don’t want to train together.”

“Figures.” He muttered.

Movement caught her eye and Katniss turned to see Peeta entering the dining room.  _ Oh no _ , she thought.  _ Did he hear us? _ She searched his face for anything that would clue her into his thoughts. She could see the crease in his brow and the slight, uncharacteristic downturn of his mouth. He had heard. And he was not happy about it.

“Peeta-” Katniss said, rising out of her chair.

“Don’t.” He said roughly, holding up a hand to stop her.

“But I-”

“Save it, Katniss.” Peeta said, his face twisting in frustration and pain. “If that’s the way you want it, fine. We’ll just go into the arena alone. Never mind the chances of us dying are greater if we don’t team up. And for what? You can’t watch me die? It’s not like you haven’t seen it before. We’ve been forced to watch children die since birth!”

“Enough, boy.” Haymitch warned, giving Peeta a chastising look.

As Peeta’s words ran through her mind, panic bloomed in Katniss’s chest and she found it hard to breath. This wasn’t what she wanted, was it? Their last moments together filled with anger and resentment. But it was true, she couldn’t watch him covered in blood as the last breath left his body. Why couldn’t he understand that? “Peeta, I just can’t-”

“Enough!” Peeta bellowed, ignoring the looks of confusion and horror from the trio that just walked in. Effie, Cinna, and Portia stood at the door, their mouths hanging open in shock. Peeta lowered his voice. “Enough, Katniss. I get it. You don’t want me around.”

Katniss fought back the tears in her eyes. She would not cry in front of him. Not again. She drew a shaky breath and whispered. “It’s not like that…”

Peeta took three long steps and came to a stop before her. “Then what is it?” He asked softly. She saw him raise a hand and was disappointed when he seemed to think twice about touching her and dropped it back to his side. “Whatever it is, you can tell me. You’re my best friend. All I’ve ever wanted to do is protect you.”

His words pierced her heart and she couldn’t think straight. This was exactly the thing she needed to avoid; Peeta thinking he should risk his life for hers. And being close to him was intoxicating and it jumbled her thoughts. She shook her head, feeling her tears slip free. “I can’t.” She whispered and turned to run from the room.

“Katniss, wait!” Peeta called after her, but Haymitch stopped him.

“Let her go. She needs to sort this out on her own.”

She raced down the hall and slammed her door before locking it and sliding down to sit on the floor. She was glad for the old man’s intervention. If Peeta pushed her in her vulnerable state, she might have told him how she felt. That was a horrible idea. She imagined telling Peeta she liked him right before the first cannon went off. He’d probably be so distracted, he’d be killed before he stepped off the platform. The last thing either of them needed was a distraction.

Later in the evening, Effie graciously showed her how to order food directly to her room. She also told her where and when to report for training in the morning and gave her a sympathetic pat on the shoulder. Katniss ate and dressed mechanically before settling herself on the soft bed and drifting to sleep.

* * *

 

Training was tough. Especially since she spent her time avoiding Peeta, but staying close enough to observe him. He didn’t seem affected by her actions at all. In fact, he seemed his usual, charming self. He made quick friends with the Career tributes and Katniss had to resist the urge to get closer to see what they were always talking about. When the Careers were too busy with the weapons, Peeta would amble around the room and stop at seemingly random stations. When he thought no one was looking, Katniss noticed he formed a connection with the girl from Eleven, Rue.

Watching him interact with her brought up memories of him and Prim. It made her chest ache in longing for home. She decided to ignore Peeta and turn back to her knot-tying station. After completing dozens upon dozens of knots, she broke down and looked up to find him again. He was at the camouflage station with Rue. They were both painting their arms and talking casually. She shouldn’t have been surprised at how good he was at the camouflage. Her birthday present was evidence enough of his talent. But still, when he held up his paint covered arm to show Rue, Katniss widened her eyes at how much it looked like real bark and moss.

It was halfway through their third day of training. After lunch, they had their private sessions with the Gamemakers to determine their scores. Katniss fidgeted all through her meal, nervous about how they would judge her skill, until a small bell signaled the end of their allotted meal time. Was it just her, or did the lunch period seem shorter than it had been in previous days? She moved around slowly as Capitol servants, Avoxes, cleared the tables and rearranged them into rows. The tributes were instructed to sit in pairs with their District companion until their names were called. Katniss sat straight-back next to Peeta and made a point to look in every direction except his. The minutes dragged on into hours until there was only Peeta, Katniss, and Rue.

“He’s going to get a high score.” Rue said, turning around to face Katniss and Peeta after Thresh, the tall male tribute from Eleven, was called.

Katniss was taken aback. She hadn’t talked to any of the other tributes before and tried her best to avoid situations in which someone might try to talk to her. It didn’t phase Peeta, though. Katniss resisted the urge to sigh or roll her eyes at Peeta’s friendly demeanor. He had to know that little girl was going to die.

“Why do say that?” He asked her, leaning forward slightly.

“He’s strong.” Rue said simply. “I’ve seen him work.”

“I’m pretty strong myself.” Peeta said teasingly, lifting his arm and showing her his muscles.

Rue giggled. Her high, crystal clear voice instantly reminded Katniss of Prim. Katniss turned to study the little girl. There was something about her. It wasn’t her looks. Prim was pale from head to toe, where Rue was dark. What was it? Rue looked over to her and Katniss saw them. Her eyes. Although unlike the bright blue of her sister, there was something in them that screamed “Prim.” Maybe it was their youth and innocence, or the brightness that said she was smarter than she looked.

Rue turned back to Peeta. “Are you a miner? Is that why you’re so strong?” She asked him.

Peeta smiled and shook his head. “No, I’m a baker.”

“A baker?” Rue asked incredulously. “Why would a baker need to be strong?”

He shrugged his shoulders. “Someone has to carry all the supplies. Have you ever seen a commercial bag of flour?” Rue shook her head and Peeta stretched his arms wide. “It’s this big and weighs more than you do!”

Katniss rolled her eyes. “It’s not  _ that  _ big.”

Peeta raised an eyebrow at her. “And how would you know? You’ve never lifted one.”

“I’ve seen you do it a hundred times.” She explained. “Besides, the bags say ‘fifty pounds’ right on the front. Even Prim weighs more than that.”

He smiled at her. “Okay, okay. I  _ may _ have been exaggerating.”

“What about you, Katniss? Are you a miner?” Rue asked.

Katniss shook her head. “In District Twelve, you don’t become a miner until after your last Reaping.”

Rue averted her eyes momentarily before bringing them back to Katniss. “Oh, well… Do you have any hidden talents?”

Katniss drew her brows together. Why was she asking her? Something deep within her made her want to tell the little girl in front of her. Thankfully, the door to the private training room opened just then and Rue’s name was called.

“I guess we’ll find out later, huh?” Peeta asked her, offering her a smile. Rue returned it with a nervous one of her own. “Hey, don’t worry.” Peeta told her, standing up and placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. “You’ll do great. Just show them what you got, okay?”

Rue nodded. “Right. Thanks, Peeta.” She gave them both one last smile before turning and walking into the room.

“Why?” Katniss asked suddenly, unable to hold herself back.

Peeta sat back down beside her and avoided her eyes. “Why, what?”

“Why are you making friends. You know there’s only one winner.”

Peeta sighed and ran a hand through his blonde waves and leaned his arms on his thighs. “Because it doesn’t matter.”

She furrowed her brows in puzzlement. “What-”

“It doesn’t matter if I know Rue as well as I know you, or if I’ve never talked to her.” He started to clarify. He turned his head and pinned Katniss with an intense gaze. “When she dies, I will mourn her. I will mourn her whether I know her or not. So instead of ignoring everyone, like you, I choose to get to know them, so if they die and by some miracle I win, I will remember them. The _real_ _people_ they are underneath. Not-” He drew breath to continue, but seemed to think better of it and looked away instead.

She kept her eyes on his profile, feeling sympathy well up inside her. “I’m sorry. I didn’t ask to be mean or anything. I was just confused.”

Peeta looked up at her from his position slouched over his knees. “It’s okay. The past couple of days have been rough for both of us.” The look he gave her told her he suffered more than she did.

Guilt and shame washed up over Katniss like a wave and she found herself fighting back tears. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just thought it would be easier.” She whispered before looking away.

“Was it?” He breathed.

“I don’t know.” She answered. A feeling of loneliness washed over her, stronger than anything she had felt in the past three days. “You probably don’t want anything to do with me anymore.”

To her surprise, Peeta chuckled. “Never. I’ll always want you around.” He said, giving her a bright smile.

“Really?” She asked softly.

“Always.”

They sat in a comfortable silence until Peeta’s name was called. He rose slowly from his seat and turned to face Katniss, wishing her luck before disappearing behind the door. And then she was alone.

* * *

 

_ Stupid! _ Katniss thought wildly as she pressed herself forward down the hallway.  _ Stupid, stupid, stupid! _

The arrow Katniss had shot into the Gamemakers’ area would surely be her downfall. They would give her a zero and nobody will sponsor her. She’ll die in the arena.

“Katniss?” Effie said, pulling Katniss out of her haze. “Are you alright, darling? Come, sit and eat.” The fluorescent pink-clad woman rushed to her side and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Effie was a lot of things, but one thing she wasn’t was unkind. Katniss felt grateful for the help and took her seat at the table.

“Well, Sweetheart.” Haymitch said when the first course was brought out. “How did you do?”

“Uh…” Katniss paused, unsure if she wanted them to know what she had done. “Fine, I guess…” She stuffed a roll into her mouth so she wouldn’t have to speak more. She met Peeta’s eyes across the table and smiled when she saw his friendly expression. She wanted to ask him how he did, but the inticing smell of the soup in front of her begged to be eaten.

The group ate diligently and Effie supplied all the topics for conversation. Katniss was glad none of them revolved around the Games or the scoring. Effie used the dessert course to go over their schedules for the next day. Peeta would train with Haymitch for the interview, while Katniss would train with Effie. Katniss frowned at the thought of being alone in a room with the eccentric Capitol woman all day. She would no doubt berate Katniss for her lack of grace and charm.

The television in the adjacent room came to life without warning and Effie clapped her hands to usher us in front of the screen. She expected Peeta to take the seat next to Haymitch one of  the two-seater couches, but instead he moved to the other. Impulsively, Katniss sat down beside him. She pretended to not notice his smile when she did so. Something had changed between them in the afternoon. Though, she still didn’t want to think about teaming up or anything that might happen in just _ three days.  _ She, again, pushed her confusing thoughts aside and turned to face Peeta.

“How do you think you did?” She asked him.

“I honestly don’t know.” He answered with a smile and a chuckle. “I just threw around some heavy weights until they told me to go.”

“Don’t underestimate strength, Peeta.” Haymitch said before Katniss could respond. She waited for him to elaborate, be he just focused his eyes on the screen and ordered another drink.

“What about you, Katniss?” Peeta asked, drawing her attention back to him.

Panic seized all her thoughts. It wasn’t that she forgot what she did in the training room, it was just that food was a good distraction from it. “I, uh... “ She felt her breathing pick up and it became harder to breathe with every gulp of air.

“Well?” Effie asked, looking at her expectantly. 

“Uh-” She was interrupted by the beginning of the broadcast, where two newscasters sat at a table and rambled on about how exciting it was going to be. Katniss released a breath of relief and settled into the couch to watch her fellow tributes on screen. They ran through the list of tributes surprisingly quick, pausing only a few seconds between each score. Commentaries were saved for after the final score. The Career tributes scored well. All were ranging from a score of eight to ten. The tributes from District Two frightened her with their scores of ten. Out of Twelve, it was an impressive score.

Rue surprisingly pulled a seven. Peeta whooped at the screen and threw a fist into the air. His score followed immediately. Under his handsome face flashed an eight. Katniss looked over at Peeta’s surprised face as everyone around them cheered excitedly. An eight was a good score. One of the Careers had gotten an eight. She had been right all along, Peeta has a chance. She clung to that thought, forgetting her own anxiety. She heard her name on the screen and saw her face. The three seconds it took for the score to show beneath her was agonizing, but when it showed, she felt her heart stop.

Eleven.

Katniss had gotten and eleven out of twelve. The highest score out of all the tributes this year. Her first thought was how. How had she gotten the highest score?

“What did you do?” Peeta asked wonderingly beside her. Absorbed in her thoughts, she hadn’t noticed the stunned silence in the room.She turned to him and shook her head.

“I shot an arrow at them.” She replied, almost mechanically. Peeta’s eyebrows rose into his hair before his eyes softened in pride and a wide grin spread across his face.

“You damn well got their attention, sweetheart.” Haymitch said, laughing hysterically.


	11. Confessions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is! The chapter you've been waiting for (sort of/ I hope so!). Get ready for some Everlark moments! :)
> 
> Just to let you guys know, I am posting them as soon as I write them. So at the moment, I have not started chapter 12, but I will soon! I promise!
> 
> By the way, you guys sure know how to motivate a writer! I've got so many ideas floating around in my head and all I want to do is write them down. Unfortunately (for you) I have a ten (almost eleven) month old who is discovering the world the entire time he is not sleeping. Please bear with me!
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> ~Abi

Peeta's cheeks still burned from smiling the next morning. He always knew Katniss was amazing, her top score just proved it to everyone else. He had never been so proud of someone. That pride also filled him with hope. Hope that she would live and that their last days together wouldn't be strained. He was sad they wouldn't get to spend a lot of time together, especially after the promising moment they had had the day before. They were being trained separately for their interviews and would only see each other at meal times.

"Alright," Haymitch said, bringing him out of his thoughts. "I don't think you'll have much trouble with the interviews. You seem a likable enough kid."

"Okay." Peeta said uncertainly. "Then what are we supposed to do?"

"I thought we could come up with a plan for the arena." He replied. "Whatever we decide is likely going to affect what you'll do during the interview. Have you given any more thought to the romance angle we talked about?"

Peeta pursed his lips in deep thought. He had thought about it. Although, his thoughts had less to do with the actual plan and more so with convincing Katniss to team up with him so he could protect her. Not to mention the thousand times his mind wandered to how he would have to convince people of his love for her. Stolen kisses, tight embraces… _other things._ Peeta felt his face get warm and took a deep breath to try and regroup his wandering mind.

"Are you going to answer me?" Haymitch asked, irritated. "Or are you just going to stand there thinking about your sweetheart in her underwear?"

Peeta blanched and turned narrow eyes toward his mentor. "That's not what I was thinking about!" He shouted. But now that it was said, the image was the only thing he could see. He closed his eyes tightly and pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration.

"Relax, I was only teasing…" Haymitch said. They stood in awkward silence for awhile before Peeta finally sighed and throwed himself onto the sofa.

"The only thing I want is for Katniss to make it out and back to District Twelve," Peeta confessed tiredly.

"Easier said than done," Haymitch muttered under his breath. "Has she reconsidered teaming up?"

Peeta shook his head. "I don't think she wants to team up with anyone."

Haymitch took a long drink from his metal flask and wiped his mouth on the back of his sleeve. Peeta noticed it was the same one he had been wearing the day before. The plaid pattern and wrinkles were a stark contrast to the Capitol fashions worn even by the Avoxes.

The older man cleared his throat and sat on the arm of one of the plush chairs. "So, Plan A was to get Sweetheart to team up with you so you could protect her." Peeta nodded and Haymitch continued, "Now we need Plans B and C. I say Plan B is you trailing her and watching her back for as long as you can. If you can stay out of sight, you might be able to step in and help if she needs it. She'll be pissed about it, though."

Peeta chuckled humorlessly. "She'll be pissed if I do anything other than try to win for myself."

Haymitch stood and began to pace about the room. "So, that leaves Plan C. You've made a good impression with the Careers. Do you think you could convince them to let you join them?"

Peeta drew his eyebrows together. "I don't think so. I might have caught their attention during training, but with my score, they probably see me as a target now."

"Katniss got the highest score," Haymitch responded. "They'll most likely target her after the initial bloodbath."

Peeta winced and looked down at the floor. "How do I keep them away from each other?"

"Join them," he stated. Haymitch sat down on the coffee table in front of the tribute and leaned forward, causing Peeta to look up. They locked eyes and the mentor narrowed his. "If you want to protect your sweetheart, you've got to lead the Careers away from her. You know how she thinks. Tell the Careers that, and they just might let you in. It's risky, but if you can get in with them, you have a shot."

Peeta sat back and thought his options over. None of them sounded too promising. Katniss would never go for his prefered Plan A. And she would lose it if he went with Plan B. He hated Plan C, knowing he might have to do some awful stuff to convince the Careers he was on their side. But if it meant keeping Katniss's biggest competition away from her…

"Okay," Peeta asserted. "Plan C it is."

"Alright," Haymitch nodded at him. "Let's work on your interview."

* * *

Peeta shifted nervously from foot to foot. Thresh was up on stage, giving one word answers and grunting when words didn't suit him. Caesar would cut his interview short for sure. Katniss was up next and Peeta worried for her. He knew she wasn't a people person. He and Haymitch had talked about it earlier. Katniss may have gotten the highest score, but sponsors were still wary of her. His mentor said it was because she wasn't very "likable." It didn't make sense to Peeta, he thought the opposite.

That's when Haymitch had voiced his intentions for the interviews. He made a big spiel about how popular Peeta was, and that if he confessed his love for Katniss in front of the entire country, other sponsors would fall in love with her too. It didn't make a lot of sense to him, but Haymitch was more familiar with Capitolites than he was.

Katniss glanced back at him and he offered her a reassuring smile. She was stunning in her flame inspired dress. He noticed the jewels covering her dress were very similar to the ones on the sleeve of his suit jacket. He wondered if their stylists planned to dress them similarly for a reason.

"You look amazing, Katniss." Peeta whispered.

She blushed and he thought she looked even more beautiful. "Thanks," she muttered back.

"Hey," he said just as she was turning back around. She paused, turning her head back slightly. "Whatever happens tonight," he told her, "will you meet me up on the roof tonight?"

She turned to face him directly. "The roof?" She asked, confusion pinching her eyebrows together. He nodded and she tilted her head to the side. "But, why-"

"Katniss!" Effie squealed. "It's time."

Peeta watched her walk unsteadily towards the stage. When she was out of sight, he turned to the screen that showed a live feed of the stage. He watched as Caesar asked her questions. She was doing surprisingly well. Then he saw her twirl around and his breath caught in his throat. The light reflecting off the jewels on her dress resembled a flickering flame. The audience cheered wildly for her and Peeta felt his lips pulling into a smile. And then it was over and Effie was gesturing him to the stage.

He smiled and waved at the people as they cheered for him. There were a lot of them and although it was slightly overwhelming, Peeta kept his expression cheery. His mind went on autopilot as he told Caesar a story about his first Capitol shower. The audience laughed louder than he thought they would and Caesar went along with the whole thing, prolonging the joke. When the laughter died down, the hard question came.

"So, Peeta," Caesar began. "Do you have a girlfriend back in District Twelve?"

Peeta looked in the audience and caught his mentor's eye. Haymitch nodded once and Peeta shook his head and looked down at his feet. He felt his cheeks color as he thought, _This is it._

"Really?" Caesar asked, lifting his eyebrows as high as they would go. There are a few catcalls from the audience and Peeta felt his lips quirk up. "I find that hard to believe," Caesar continued. "A handsome guy like you must have a special girl! Come on, what's her name?"

Peeta sighed. "Well, there is this one girl. I've been in love with her for a while, but I'm pretty sure she doesn't feel the same way."

The people in the audience "awed" and Caesar beamed. "No problem! Win the Games and she'll fall in love with you for sure!"

"Winning won't help me…"

"Why ever not?" Caesar asked, frowning.

"Because she came here with me."

* * *

After the interview, Katniss avoided everyone, especially Peeta. She went straight to her room and skipped dinner. Peeta sat at the table and avoided eye contact with the people around him. Effie kept trying to console him, saying things like "she'll come around" and "don't worry about it so close to the Games."

Peeta excused himself from the table early and made his way to the roof. Haymitch had showed it to him the day before. From the roof of the building, Peeta could see the people below. They were shouting and dancing in the streets. Screens were set up in regular interviews and each showed something different. He noticed his and Katniss's face showed up more than the other tributes and hoped that meant they would get more sponsors.

The concrete barrier was cool against his skin as he leaned against it. Peeta wasn't sure how long he had been up there, but it was long enough for the sun to start to disappear behind the skyline. He stood and watched the colors dance off of the metal and glass sctructures around him.

He felt her approach from behind. He had hoped she would come here, but until this moment, he wasn't sure she would. She stopped just out of his line of sight, standing at his shoulder. He was afraid to face her. What do you say to the girl you confessed your love for in front of the entire country? His mind was drawing a blank. All he could see was her face when he saw her after the interviews were over. The look of betrayal she gave him before turning in early for the night. She hadn't said a word once the interviews were over.

Peeta angled his head towards her, but kept his eyes averted. "Katniss, I'm so sorry-"

"Don't apologize." She said softly. He looked up at her. Her dark hair was loose around her shoulders and her cheeks stained with tears. Was that his fault? He was surprised when she gave him a tentative smile before moving past him to sit on the bench carved out of the cement barrier.

She looked up at him expectantly and he took the seat beside her without a second thought. His heartbeat picked up speed when she inched closer as she adjusted her position. She was angled towards him, but her focus was on the city before them. She stared down at the twinkling lights and jubilant people celebrating below. He stared at them too, anxiously waiting for her to say something. It was several minutes before she did.

"Is it true?" She asked softly, keeping her eyes on the Capitolites below.

Peeta turned to face her, shifting his body so that he was sitting sideways on the bench. He swallowed the lump in his throat, determined to give her the truth she deserved. "Yes." He choked out, resisting the compulsion to look away.

She turned her head slowly to face him. Her gray eyes shone bright in the city lights. It looked as if she wanted to say something, but she remained silent. Her eyes narrowed as they searched Peeta's. He held under her gaze, refusing to back down. When he could no longer take the silence, he spoke.

"I love you." He declared. Her eyes widened and her lips parted to speak but he pushed on. "I've loved you for awhile now. Well, I've _liked_ you for as long as I can remember, but I fell in love with you within the past couple of months. I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I should have. I was just afraid of your reaction, especially after what you said about not wanting to get married."

Katniss turned her face away again. She drew her knees up to her chest and hugged them tightly. Peeta considered saying something else, but he wasn't sure if that was a good idea. Luckily, Katniss picked up the lull. "I think I have… feelings for you." She admitted so quietly, Peeta thought he had misheard. She looked back at him. "I'm not exactly sure what I'm feeling, but I know it's more than friendship. The only person I've ever loved is Prim. It's the only love I can compare it to, and it's different, so I don't know..."

Peeta was sure his chest was about to burst with happiness. He reached out to stroke her cheek with his fingers, and she nuzzled into it. "It's okay. You don't have to analyze anything." He smiled at her, feeling the happiness bubble over. "I'm just happy you feel anything for me at all."

"But, tomorrow-"

"Don't worry about tomorrow, not right now." He interrupted her. "There's just one thing I want to know."

Katniss tilted her head to the side, out of his reach and sat up straighter. "What?"

Peeta let his hand fall into his lap and looked down at it to hide his nerves. It was something he had been wanting to ask her since her birthday, since she told him she didn't want to get married. He cleared his throat and looked back up at her perplexed expression. "If we hadn't been reaped…" He began, pausing briefly to take a deep breath. "If none of this had ever happened, would there have been a chance between us? I know you said you didn't want to get married, but was there any chance that we might have just… been together?"

Katniss looked away and furrowed her brow. "I never wanted to get married. And I still feel that way. If by some miracle I make it out of this alive, I'm sure I will never get married." Peeta felt his stomach drop. When she looked back at him, her expression was filled with grief and uncertainty. "When my dad died, it was rough on me and Prim, but it completely destroyed my mom. She would lay in bed for days and not eat or anything. Prim and I almost starved to death, and she would have just let us. All because she couldn't deal with my dad's death. I… I never wanted to be like that, so I told myself I didn't want to get married or have kids or anything like that, because I don't want to risk losing myself in grief."

Peeta hurt for her. She has lived through more pain than any one person should have to bear. He shifted closer to her and pulled her into a hug, rubbing her back gently. "I'm so sorry, Katniss." He whispered into her hair. "I didn't know."

She let him hold her for a few moments before pulling back slightly and wiping her eyes dry. "I've never told anyone before, but I feel like I can tell you anything."

He smiled at her. "I'm glad."

Katniss smiled in return and chuckled quietly to herself. "I never answered your question."

"What are talking about? You just told me…"

Katniss took a deep breath and turned her head to lay it on his shoulder. "I told how I felt before and how I think I feel now… But part of me just gravitates towards you. I already know I'll never be the same if you die. That's why this has been so hard for me. I think I can honestly say that if we had both survived all the reapings, I might have considered it… Eventually. And not necessarily marriage, but just... being together."

"Really?" Peeta asked her, feeling his aching heart stitch itself back together. Katniss nodded. She was still in his arms and before he lost the nerve he asked, "Can I kiss you?"

"You've never asked before." Katniss laughed, leaning back.

"It's been hard." Peeta said, thinking about the times he had let himself kiss her over the past few days. "It's hard to be near you. To know that I'm about to die and not be able to say goodbye to you the way I want. But if you let me kiss you now, I can die happy."

"You don't know if you're going to die." She said fiercely, her fingers digging into his arms. "Stop saying that!"

"Katniss…" Peeta whispered. "I don't want to live without you. I'd rather die than go back to District Twelve alone."

"Don't sacrifice yourself for me, Peeta!" She argued, her cheeks flushing in frustration. "You could win. And the money you would get as a victor could help all the starving people in the Seam. Think about all the people you could help!"

"What about you?" He asked. "You have a better chance at winning than I do. You have the highest score!"

She sat up and away from him. "I'm not giving up. I want nothing more than to go back to Prim."

"Then let me help you." Peeta pleaded, scooting closer to her. "Let me protect you so you have a better chance of going home."

He saw her eyes fill with tears. "I can't ask you to do that." She breathed.

"I want to." He insisted. "I'm going to, whether you ask for my help or not."

"You can't do that!" She exclaimed angrily.

"What? I can't kill off every other tribute until we're the only two left and then just kill myself?" He questioned loudly.

"Stop it!" Katniss shouted. Peeta instantly felt guilty.

"I'm sorry." He said quickly. "Let's talk about something else."

"No." She declared. "We need to talk about this. We need to figure it all out. And then we need to say goodbye."

"I don't want to say goodbye."

She sighed and closed her eyes. "Peeta, we have to. Why not now? While we have the time. Who knows what will happen in the arena?"

Peeta wanted to argue with her. He wanted to tell her he wouldn't leave her side until it was time for him to die. His plan was a good one, he knew it. He just had to keep her alive as long as possible. Instead, he asked, "You still don't want to team up, do you?"

Katniss hesitated before shaking her head. "There's only one victor. If we did make it to the end, I think watching you kill yourself would be worse than watching someone else do it."

_One victor_. The phrase echoed through Peeta's mind and he started to think. The ludicrous rule had been ingrained into their heads since they were old enough to understand what it meant. But did it have to be that way? What if there were no winners? No victor for the Capitol to exploit and flaunt in front of the other Districts. No victor. It was crazy, but it might just be enough to start a revolution. _Revolution?_ Peeta thought. _Where did that come from? Do I really want a revolution? Yes. At the cost of Katniss's life?_ He paused. He couldn't ask her to sacrifice her life for the off chance that it would cause the people to uprise. It was selfish, but he tucked away all thoughts of rebellion and focused on Katniss's beautiful face.

She caught him staring and he saw her cheeks colored slightly. Her lips were upturned at the corners. Peeta gave her a reassuring smile. She returned it shyly and cleared her throat.

"So…" She began haltingly, her face reddening more. "You still want that kiss?"

Peeta straightened immediately, his eyes growing wide. "Really?"

Katniss nodded and averted her eyes. Her cheeks were still flushed and Peeta could feel his pulse pounding in his veins. He eagerly leaned toward her and she did the same. When their faces were just inches apart, Peeta paused and scrutinized her. Seeing openness in her features, he reached up to cup her cheek and closed the remaining distance between them.

Her lips were softer than Peeta could have ever imagined. He pulled her head closer to press deeper into her lips. And as much as he wanted to recreate every fantasy he had ever had of Katniss, he restrained himself and pulled away after a few seconds. When he leaned back to take in her reaction, she followed him, keeping her lips pressed to his for a second longer.

"That's it?" Katniss exclaimed when they parted. She blinked up at him, disappointment evident in her eyes. She was positively radiant when she blushed.

Peeta couldn't help the small chuckle that escaped his lips. He stared down at her in wonder as he whispered hopefully, "Did you want more?"

Her chest heaved with her labored breaths and she smiled at his playful tone. "I just thought…" She stammered. "It's probably the only kiss I'll ever get," she whispered.

He furrowed his brows in concern. "Not if you win."

"Even then…" She admitted.

"Katniss-"

He never got to finish his argument because Katniss pressed forward suddenly and captured his lips in a fiery kiss. Peeta blinked his surprise at the feeling of her lips on his. He soon recovered and wrapped his arms around her. Their mouths moved against each others vigorously and he pulled her closer until their torsos were flush. Katniss's hands found their way into his hair and he groaned when she tugged on the strands at the base of his neck.

Katniss turned her head to the side and drew in a large breath. Peeta started to pull away, but once again, Katniss pulled him back to her lips. He readily responded, capturing her bottom lip between his own. He barely heard her sigh when he nipped her.

An obscenely loud horn sounded from the streets below and the two jumped apart with a start. They glanced at the scene below them and saw the screens lit up and flashing colors. In bright red lettering the words "12 HOURS!" blinked on all across the square. More words and pictures of tributes blinked on the screens so rapidly, Peeta could feel his head start to ache.

"Their counting down the hours until our deaths." Katniss whispered hotly.

Peeta looked over at her, his expression sobering. He knew the anger she felt. He felt it too. But it was one thing to think these things, and another to think them out loud. Peeta laid a hand on her shoulder, drawing her attention to him.

"Come on," he said. "We should get to bed."

She sighed deeply and took one last look at the people dancing in anticipation for their deaths. Her face became neutral, but Peeta could still see the fire in her eyes. When she nodded her assent, he took her hand and led her down the multiple flights of stairs to their floor. Outside her bedroom door, Peeta made to say his goodbyes.

Before he could speak, Katniss wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug. "Thank you, Peeta. For tonight and everything else."

He smiled at her when she pulled away. "Anytime, Katniss." He replied. "If I don't see you, good luck… And I love you."

Katniss blushed and nodded. "Good luck to you too, Peeta. Don't give up."

"I won't." He told her, unsure about how true it was. He leaned forward and brushed his lips across her forehead, unable to keep from thinking it might be the last time he kissed her. "Goodnight."

Katniss opened her door when he pulled back and stepped inside. Peeta heard her whisper "goodnight" before the door closed.


	12. Let the Games Begin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry! I know it's been like five months. For some reason I thought being a SAHM would allow me to write more, but of course it doesn't. As I'm writing this, I have a psycho toddler hanging off my leg and screaming for god knows why… To top it all off I now have to get a job. Sigh…
> 
> Sorry, enough about my problems, here is the next chapter! And we finally made it to the hunger games! :D Get ready for some action! Most of this chapter will follow the same plot line as HG, but of course there will be some minor changes. Totally understand if this isn't quite as exciting as a true AU, but I felt it was necessary.
> 
> Also, Happy Thanksgiving to my fellow Americans!
> 
> Enjoy! :D

 

**Chapter 12: Let the Games Begin**

Katniss was still a little dizzy from twirling onstage, but she thought she had heard correctly. She replayed the words in her head. She wasn't mistaken, Peeta just told all of Panem that he was in love with her. _Her._ She felt her cheeks burn as she focused heavily on the floor in front of her. It couldn't be true. There was no way Peeta had those sort of feelings for her.

Her eyes narrowed in concentration. Was this one of Haymitch's plans? She wouldn't willingly go along with the fake romance, so now he was forcing it. But how could that possibly help her? Would people think they would team up? Her mind raced with the possible implications. Could this be a plot for Peeta to gain sympathy and more sponsors?

Annoyance and betrayal crept up into her mind and soured her expression. She barely registered the closing song and Effie urging them into the elevators. While waiting for the doors to open, she chanced a glance at Peeta. His hopeful eyes searched her own and she looked away quickly. When they reached their floor in the training center, Katniss ran to her room as quickly as she could.

Fighting back angry tears, she removed her dress. The delicate fabric tore in some spots, but she didn't care. As soon as the Capitol finery was discarded on the floor, Katniss entered the bathroom and jabbed random buttons. Hot, fragrant water rained down from spout nestled in the ceiling. It reminded her of home, the forest during a thunderstorm. She stripped completely before stepping under the water, breathing deeply. She watched as gold glitter and black runs of eye makeup ran down the glass walls of the shower.

It wasn't until she tried to run an hand through her hair that she realized it was still done up in intricate braids. Sighing in frustration, Katniss began ripping the pins out of her hair and throwing them on the ground, not caring if they went down the drain. She silently hoped they would, and cause a little of damage too. What does it matter anyway? In a few days she would either be dead or a victor. Neither would be cause for retribution. _Or celebration_ , she thought, dismayed.

Once her body was clean, she stepped out and dried herself off. While dressing, Katniss let her mind wander. She thought back to a few months ago, when she pretended to tutor Peeta. Her mind pointed out all the small, sweet gestures he had made- bringing her family food from the bakery, listening to her when she needed to talk, taking her mind off her stresses, her birthday present. She thought back to a few days ago when Gale had exploded about her friendship with Peeta. _Anyone with eyes can see he's in love with you!_ He'd said.

Was it really true? She had shrugged it off that day, reminding herself that Peeta had had plenty of opportunities to confess his feelings. Then again, there had been a few small signs of his affection. She recalled the way he would occasionally rub her cheek with his fingers, or when he held her hand on her birthday. But she also remembered the way he casually mentioned they were _just friends_ after she had panicked at the meadow. All these thoughts muddled her mind, she didn't know what to think anymore. It was getting harder to tell truth from imagination.

There was one thing she could do. She could confront Peeta and ask for the truth. What had he said before the interviews? _Whatever happens, will you meet me up on the roof tonight?_

Decision made, Katniss ordered an array of food from the mouthpiece and planned what she would say to Peeta when she finally mustered the courage to go up to the roof.

* * *

As Katniss closed the door to her room, she finally felt her heart slow its pounding. She had kissed Peeta! Not just a peck, but a _real_ kiss. It wasn't what she was expecting when she met him up on the roof, but when he confessed that it was true- that he loved her- she couldn't help it. Her heart had burst with happiness while the back of her mind reminded her that one of them would be dead in a few days. And while she couldn't imagine ever getting married, she could imagine being in Peeta's arms. And now she had the memory of kissing him.

Under the covers, she thought about the next coming days. It took her awhile to stop thinking about Peeta and his lips. When she finally did, she went over the basic survival tips she knew. Find water, get a feel for the arena, keep hidden. She went over the list of knots she learned in the training center as well as the ones she learned from Gale. She went over how to make a bow from scratch in case there wasn't one in the Cornucopia.

After thinking of everything she needed to keep in mind, she thought about various scenarios. If she ran into the careers, Peeta, or Rue. She decided to run from the careers unless she had a bow, avoid Peeta as much as possible so that she wouldn't have to watch him die, and she decided to keep an open mind about Rue. She wasn't looking to join up with anyone, but if the girl from Eleven had some useful tricks, it might be a good move.

Katniss began slowing her thoughts and preparing for sleep. A quiet mind was always conducive to a good night's sleep. She hoped she wouldn't have any nightmares and finally allowed herself to drift to sleep.

* * *

The morning was slow. Katniss followed Cinna to the roof and did as she was told. The ladder to the impressive hovercraft locked her in place as it retracted inside. Her arm still hurt from where the tracker was placed. She ate as much food as she could without making herself sick, and she took sips of water every few minutes. When a small package arrived, Cinna helped her into the plain but practical clothes. He warned her to look out for cooler nights because the jacket was designed to hold in body heat.

Then he surprised her by bringing out the mockingjay pin Madge had given her. She had forgotten about it. They must have retrieved it from the clothes she was wearing before she arrived in the Capitol.

"For good luck," Cinna said as he pinned it to her jacket. "It's your token, right?"

Katniss nodded. "Yeah, my friend, Madge, gave it to me."

Cinna smiled warmly at her. "She's betting on you to come home. So would I, if I could bet."

This shocked Katniss. Could there really be people rooting for her? Of course her family would. Gale's family would too. But a Capitol stylist?

"Really?" She asked before she could stop herself.

"Of course," Cinna chuckled. "There's something about you. A fire in your eyes that's brighter than any synthetic fire I could make for you."

The sentiment warmed Katniss and she breathed deeper. She fidgeted nervously on the couch while they waited to be called to the launch pad. Her stylist handed her another glass of water and she drank it slowly, making sure not to over-do it. Finally, after what felt like hours, a pleasant female voice called her to the circular launch pad.

"Don't forget what Haymitch said." Cinna reminded her as she climbed onto the raised platform. He took her hand. "Run. Find water." Katniss nodded and stood on the small circle. "I'm counting on you, girl on fire." He said as a glass cylinder dropped around her, breaking her contact to Cinna.

The platform began to rise and Katniss could feel her heartbeat pick up. Her stomach churned and she fought to keep her food down as she continued to get higher and higher. She looked above her to see light shining. It became brighter as she approached it, until suddenly, she was outside.

Katniss surveyed the scene in front of her. The Cornucopia stood towering in the center of the circle of tributes. Flowing out of it's mouth were packs, weapons, and food. Anything and everything one would need to survive. Her eye caught the glinting silver of a bow and she thought she could make it there if she sprinted. She was pretty fast. But Haymitch's voice came back to her: _run, find water._ She glanced at the tributes beside her, breathing a sigh of relief when there were no careers in her immediate vicinity.

Then she spotted Peeta, a few tributes to her right. He was looking at her, concern written all over his face. _I kissed you last night_ , she thought briefly before turning back and eyeing the bow again. It tempted her. With a bow, she could easily find food and defend herself. She chanced a look back at Peeta and swore she saw him shake his head. But before she could wonder what he was thinking, the gong rang out.

Katniss burst into action, losing a couple seconds as she debated going for her weapon. Her legs carried her towards her prize, but she had lost too much time. She settled for an orange pack a couple feet away. As soon as her hand wrapped around one of the straps, she felt it being pulled in the opposite direction. She looked up to find the boy from District 9 on the other end.

Katniss tugged back and was relieved when he suddenly let go. Then she saw him slump to the ground, a knife hilt protruding from his back. Fear struck her core as she scrambled back, backpack in tow. A dozen yards away stood the girl from District 2, a wicked smile on her face as she drew another knife from her belt. Katniss surged to her feet and ran as fast as she could towards the woods, her safety net.

She expected to hear a knife whistle by, and that fear made her throw her backpack over her shoulder to offer a little protection. When no knife came, she chanced a peek over her shoulder without slowing her pace. She saw that the girl from District 2 had been distracted by something. Or rather some _one_. Peeta stood of to the girl's right, a large knife in hand. They were speaking and Katniss felt her feet slow as she watched them interact.

She was too far away to hear what they were saying, but it seemed the Career had had enough of his talk because she turned away from him just as the boy from District 1 grabbed Peeta by the arms and forced him to drop his weapon. Stricken with fear, Katniss stopped in her tracks and turned towards Peeta. At that moment, a knife flew by, narrowly missing the back of her head. Without another thought, she began to run again and hiked her backpack up to cover her head.

Her instincts rewarded her with a knife in the pack. She continued running, making it past the line of trees and deeper into the woods. She didn't stop sprinting until her lungs protested. Even then, she alternated between walking and jogging, checking over her shoulder for any signs of pursuit. But she was virtually alone. Except for the small animals she occasionally frightened.

As she made her way through the trees, she kept an eye out for any source of water. Besides the lake by the Cornucopia, she saw none. Katniss kept walking, observing the forest and taking note of things that could help her out later. Like pine trees she could collect soft bark to curb hunger, and tracks of small game she could set traps for. It was hours before finally stopped and pulled the knife from where it was lodged in her pack. She then found a good spot to rest and removed her pack.

In the evening shade of an oak tree, Katniss sat and opened the florescent orange backpack. Inside was some wire, crackers and dried meat, an empty water bottle, a thin sleeping bag made of the same material as her jacket, and a few other things. While her stomach growled, she dared not open the crackers or meat. Instead, she used the wire to set traps and used her knife to harvest some soft pine. That should keep her until morning, even if it was hard to get down.

It was well into the night when Katniss heard the Capitol anthem ring out. She had jerked awake at the sound. From her position in her willow tree, she could just make out the images in the sky. Earlier in the evening, she had counted the cannons that signaled eleven tributes had died in the initial bloodbath. Katniss had hoped and prayed that Peeta was not one of them.

The image of Peeta being restrained by the tribute from District 1 brought a wave of fresh tears to her eyes. All afternoon, she had mentally kicked herself for running away like a coward. _But at least you're still alive._ A voice told her. She quickly shut it down and watched the sky for the tributes' faces. As face after face appeared in the sky, her heart pounded louder in anticipation. She counted the dead on her fingers: the boy from District 9 made ten and she held her breath as the last face appeared in the sky. A vaguely familiar feminine face flashed and the words _District 10_ appeared beneath her image. Katniss let out a relieved breath.

_Peeta is alive!_ She thought as she buried herself back into her sleeping bag. The knowledge that Peeta had made it passed the first day made her breathe a littler easier, but she still worried about the days to come. Katniss hoped she wouldn't run into Peeta for the rest of the games. Although a smaller, romantic part of her wished she could see him one last time. She wanted to hold him, kiss him, love him the way she knew she could… Eventually.

The sound of a snapped twig brought her back to the present and Katniss froze. Fearing the worst, she dared not move. The slightest movement could give away her position faster than the orange backpack would. She listened carefully as more branches snapped, seemingly on purpose. She then heard rocks striking together and knew instantly that someone was building a fire. _Idiot!_ She thought, panic rising through her.

Before long, she could hear the subtle sounds of a fire crackling and could even smell the smoke. Whoever built the fire was close. Too close for comfort. Gathering her courage, Katniss eased her head slowly out of the sleeping bag. Her eyes immediately settled on the soft glow of the fire, just any other tributes' eyes would. She could see a girl huddled close to the small flame. _You will die tonight,_ Katniss thought grimly. There was nothing she could do, not if she wanted to survive and make it back to Prim. So she wrapped herself up in the thin sleeping bag and tried to get some sleep.

* * *

A high pitched scream jerked Katniss from her sleep. She cursed herself for the movement her surprise caused and stilled her limbs. As her mind woke completely from her groggy state, she realized someone must have come across the girl with the fire. There wasn't any light coming through the thin fabric above her head, so it was likely before dawn. Katniss debated whether or not to look. If she moved, it could give away her position, but if she was already found, not having a visual could put her in danger.

Taking a deep breath, Katniss inched her sleeping bag down to uncover her face. In the distance, she saw the fire, and figures scattered around it. Closest to the blaze, the girl from last night was being held down by a large boy with a sword in his hand. _Careers,_ Katniss thought. It didn't surprise her. Building a fire was one of the worst things to do when the Careers were still on their killing high. She could count five more figures standing around the fire, but it was too dark to make out their faces.

She watched in apprehension as the Careers goaded the girl that was pinned to the ground. Katniss could hear the girl whimpering, begging for her life. Other voices followed- laughing, a few rough words. But they were too far away for her to make out their words. And then it happened- the boy holding her down drew back the blade and plunged it into the girl's stomach. Katniss turned her head at the last minute, willing her empty stomach to stay calm. A few seconds passed before the cannon fired and she heard footsteps approach her position. She turned her head without thinking, and watched as six Careers walked past.

_Six Careers?_ She thought. Something was off, Katniss could feel it. She went over the list of dead tributes from last night. She furrowed her brows when she remembered that the boy from District 4 was on that list. That would mean there were five Careers left, not six. She counted them again, making out three feminine figures and… yep, three masculine. Someone must have convinced the Careers to let them join up.

They were close enough to Katniss's position to hear their word. Mostly laughing and sharp retorts. Katniss strained her ears to make out their words.

"Where to now, Cato?" One of the girls asked. The group stopped and Katniss could see them through a break in the branches.

"I guess we could circle back to the lake," he answered. "Although, I was hoping to find the guy from 11. He's our biggest threat- after that girl from 12."

Katniss's blood ran cold at his words. They were looking for _her_. Of course she knew it would be a possibility with her getting the highest score, but she had hoped they thought it was some sort of fluke. Apparently not.

"Any thoughts, Lover Boy?" The ring leader asked.

"I already told you, she's hiding," an achingly familiar voice replied. "We won't be able to find her unless she wants to be found. And if that happens, we're all done for."

Katniss clamped her hand over her mouth to keep any sounds from escaping. That voice belonged to Peeta. What was he doing with the Careers? _Hunting you_ , her inner voice said. No. That wasn't possible. There's no way the boy from last night- the boy who confessed his love for her- threw in with the Careers. Anger and betrayal bubbled up inside Katniss. _How could he?_ she thought, _After last night…_

"That good, is she?" The one called Cato teased.

"You saw her score," Peeta said evenly. Silence followed and Katniss could see light appearing on the horizon. Dawn.

"Cato, a word." The dark haired girl from District 2 said, gesturing towards Katniss's tree. Katniss held her breath, hoping that they won't get too close. She let it out when the stopped just outside the curtain of willow branches. "I don't think we should trust him." The girl told Cato, folding her arms over her chest.

"Why not?" Cato retorted. "He's our best shot at finding the girl from 12."

"I don't trust him," she reiterated, flinging her arms wide. "He told the whole country he was in love with her two days ago!"

"And he said she turned him down and practically spat in his face. He's out for revenge, Clove." Katniss furrowed her eyebrows. Why would Peeta tell them that? "Besides," Cato continued, "we can always use him as bait if it doesn't work out."

"Fine," Clove relented. Katniss stared after them as they made their way back to the rest of the group. She was too caught up in her thoughts to hear what they decided to do, but their footsteps snapped her out of her thoughts and she looked up. She saw Peeta trailing behind the rest of the Careers, keeping his eyes on the trees around him. He stood facing her tree, eyeing it for one long moment before turning and following the others.


End file.
